Black Widow and the Sandman
by silver-footsteps
Summary: Haruno Sakura hates nosy people. In fact, to make sure her privacy is maintained, she turns to a rude, violent, chain-smoking boy to help her guard her secrets. Gaasaku. AU Modern.
1. Flux

I went back to read the previous chapters of my story and I realized that Sakura is not what I planned for her to be.

She was supposed to be a girl struggling to be a strong woman. She missed her older brother but acted like a cruel person to achieve her goals. I planned for her to be a desperately fragile person who forced herself to be strong. This is what caused her split personality and inability to trust anyone outside of Akatsuki.

So I'm giving myself time to rewrite.

And I'm also giving Sakura a personality change because I'm getting very sick of her horrible attitude. I mean, as a girl, I like writing about female characters that work hard and achieve their goals. But it seems that this Sakura that I've written about has a case of permanent PMS.

So I'm sorry to anyone reading, but this story will be rewritten.

Here's the new first chapter of "Black Widow and the Sandman".

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 1: Flux

Smoke curled into the air. Haruno Sakura took a long drag on her cigarette, ignoring the curious stares from people walking on the sidewalk. Her pink hair fluttered as an office lady rushed by, juggling a laptop bag with a briefcase and a Styrofoam cup of coffee. Sakura exhaled a gray ring in front of her face as she ground the cigarette out under her heel. She sprayed herself with a bit of perfume to cover the smell and popped a stick of gum in her mouth. Hiding the habit had become second-nature to her. Teachers usually made a huge fuss when they smelled smoke on her.

"Ready to go, Hime?" Kisame asked as he watched the girl stand, brushing stray bits of dirt off the back of her dark blue plaid skirt. Ignoring his question, she hopped down from the stoop that led up to her new apartment building. Kisame remained seated on the bottom step, watching her with a faint smile.

"Geez, I don't get why you and Sasori keep calling me that," Sakura sighed, even though it was well-known that she secretly loved the childish nickname. When Kisame still didn't stand, she turned around to give him a questioning stare. She found him rummaging in his jacket pocket, searching for something. He finally fished out a bent cigarette along with a handful of wrinkled bills. The cigarette he stuck in his mouth. But he held out the money to Sakura, grinning.

"Give me a light, will you? And here's some money for lunch today," he mumbled. Sakura rolled her eyes as she reached for the silver chain around her neck. She pulled it out of her shirt, revealing a small rectangular Zippo lighter attached to the other end. It had an ornate letter 'D' etched into the side.

Sakura flicked open the top with ease, watching the little orange flame jump to life. She leaned over to let the flames lick the tip of Kisame's cigarette. The tobacco and paper smoldered, releasing a musky and bitter scent into the air. Sakura quickly drew back, wrinkling her nose.

"I don't want the smell all over me," she complained as she took a few steps back. Kisame smiled unapologetically, as he tossed his jacket over his shoulder and lifted Sakura's school bag with his free hand. He shoved the wad of bills into her hand, leaving no room for argument. Sakura sighed as she inspected the money and then leaned over to stuff it in her bag.

"You know, Kisame. I'm pretty sure I don't need 12,000 yen just for lunch," she commented as they walked down the street together. They were the strangest, most mismatched pair. Kisame, at 6' 4", towered over Sakura who struggled to claim that she was 5' 5". With his dark blue hair and gravelly voice, it was no wonder that people gave Kisame a wide berth. And Sakura had her bright pink hair (conveniently recessive in every other member of her living family except herself) and green eyes, which stood out immensely.

"You sure you'll be alright, Hime?" Kisame asked as they stopped at a crosswalk. Just across the busy street was Konohagakure High School. It was still a little before classes began so the schoolyard was mostly empty. The building was white. It had rows and rows of windows that gleamed in the early morning sun. The big clock at the top of the school reminded students of the time as they entered the gates. It was an average school in what seemed to be an average city.

Sakura scowled.

"I really have to go here for the next year?" she muttered, earning a chuckle from Kisame. They crossed the street together. Sakura quickly scanned the roof, then the school's outer walls and then she glanced over her shoulder. Kisame snorted.

"Relax, Hime," he said, pushing the girl forward. Once they entered the school grounds, Sakura glared at Kisame until, with an exaggerated sigh, he ground his cigarette out under his foot. They walked up the cement path up to the glass double doors. Kisame held the door open with a mock-bow. Sakura ignored the large man's teasing as she stepped into the high school. There were several rows of lockers meant for students to put away their outdoor shoes and their books. They took a right and walked until they reached a door with a rectangular sign glued under the glass window (Main Office).

"Excuse me," Sakura said as she slid the door open. Several heads popped up at the sound of her voice. The teachers stared her down, made silent observations and then pretended to go back to their work. But the keyboards were oddly silent and the eyes that should have been reading class materials forgot to move across the pages. A woman with blond hair in low pigtails stood up and crossed the room. Her strides were long and confident as she approached the teenage girl and the tall man.

"I'm Tsunade, the principal. Welcome to Konohagakure High School, Haruno-san. And you must be… Haruno-san's father?" the woman said, shaking Kisame's hand. Her eyes quickly darted between the people in front of her. Her expression was carefully composed as she waited for something.

And then, Kisame chuckled.

"I'm her second cousin and guardian, Takahashi Kousuke," Kisame said, reciting the information they had given the school when Sakura had registered four weeks ago. Tsunade's wary expression disappeared when she realized that the man was Sakura's guardian. Sakura suppressed an eye roll. Kisame was so good at manipulating women.

"It's very nice to meet you. You're early. Would you like me to give you both a quick tour of the school facilities?" Tsunade asked. Sakura glanced over at Kisame, giving him a minute frown.

"Ah, I'd be very happy to. But I have to get to work soon," Kisame said, shaking his head. He turned to Sakura, handing her the schoolbag.

"Will you be okay by yourself, Sakura?" he asked, turning to Sakura. Sakura smiled.

"I'll be fine, Kousuke-san. I'm sorry that I made you come along with me today," she said. With his back to the principal, nobody could see the words Kisame carefully mouthed to her. Sakura nodded once and then gave him a quick one-armed hug.

"I'm sorry that I have to leave. Please take good care of Sakura," Kisame said. He gave a quick bow and then hurried out of the office, glancing at his wristwatch. Sakura watched him leave the room with a small smile. After a moment, Tsunade put her hand on the girl's shoulder.

"He seemed like a very nice person. What does your cousin do for a living?" the woman asked, leading Sakura into the hallway. They began walking towards the classrooms.

"Oh, Kousuke-san works at a shipping company at the docks," Sakura said as they arrived in front of a classroom. Tsunade nodded, noting that the girl's story matched up with the file she had been reading earlier. But something about this new student didn't feel so right. Pushing the suspicion to the side, Tsunade slid the door open and poked her head into the classroom. The sound of idle chatter spilled into the hallway as the principal said something to the teacher. Sakura stared out the window, letting the meaningless noise wash over her. After a minute, the teacher joined them in the hallway.

"Kakashi-sensei, this is Haruno Sakura. She's a new student," Tsunade said, snapping Sakura from her reverie. Sakura smiled politely as she shook the teacher's hand. He was tall, with messy silver hair and differently colored eyes. His mouth was covered with a white mask but she heard him perfectly when he said, "Brace yourself." Sakura started to ask him what he meant but Kakashi slipped back into the classroom and smacked his book down on the desk.

"The bell rang! Get to your seats," he hollered. With a unanimous groan, the babbling in the classroom faded to a low buzz. Tsunade sighed.

"Have a nice day, Haruno-san," Tsunade said as she turned and left.

"I'd like to introduce a transfer student to you little monsters. Sakura-san, please come in," Kakashi said.

Sakura took an extra minute to swallow her gum and arrange the appropriate expression on her face. Then, she stepped into the classroom, feeling the scrutinizing glares and whispered comments envelop her. Twenty pairs of eyes were riveted to her as she stood next to the teacher.

"This is Haruno Sakura. Sakura, why don't you tell the class about yourself? Like where you're from and your hobbies."

Sakura resisted the urge to reach out and smack the boy in the front row who was eyeing her chest with interest. Instead, she took a deep breath.

"I'm Haruno Sakura. I moved here from Otogakure High School. My hobbies are…. Reading… and running, I guess," she said, purposely avoiding meeting anyone's eyes. There was a small snort from the back of the room and then a few people burst into blatant laughter. Kakashi turned around to write something on the board.

"Ino, Karin, detention today after school," he said without looking at the laughing students. The laughter immediately stopped, replaced by two female voices grumbling.

"Sakura-san, take a seat in the back next to… ah… Uchiha, raise your hand," Kakashi said, peeking over his shoulder. Very slowly, a hand rose in the air, connected to a pale boy with spiky black hair and a frown. Sakura's eyes took in the strangely familiar features for a second. The gears in her head processed the dark eyes and the shape of the face. And then…a voice in her head spoke.

'_Itachi Nii-San's younger brother: Uchiha Sasuke.'_

Sakura walked up the row and sat in the empty desk next to him. She was in the far corner of the room, allowing her to avoid the curious eyes of her new classmates and giving her the liberty to study everyone without being noticed.

'_That guy next to Uchiha. His eyes…. He's a Hyuuga. And that blond girl who laughed: Yamanaka. Farther up front, that guy with spiky hair: Akimichi. The person sleeping next to him: Nara.'_

Her eyes went up and down the seats, observing and memorizing. She recognized most of them, something that she found both good and bad. The person sitting in front of her twisted around and gave her a cheeky grin.

"Hey there. I'm Uzumaki Naruto. Nice to meet you," he said as he extended his hand for a shake. But before he had even opened his mouth, Sakura had known who he was. She held his gaze, silently willing him to recognize her. But when he continued to remain oblivious, she ignored his hand and went back to analyzing everyone in the room. Naruto seemed unfazed by her cold attitude.

"Hey, you have the same name as this girl I used to know. Can I call you Sakura-chan? Are you busy after school Sakura-chan? Do you want to hang out? I know this really good place where we can buy ramen," Naruto babbled. Sakura's eyes slowly focused on his face. She wondered how he had the lung capacity to say so much at once without taking a breath. His trivial words flew right past her. In fact, she had stopped listening after he had begun to call her 'Sakura-chan'. She stared at him with a blank expression until Kakashi threw a piece of chalk at the back of Naruto's head and instructed him to "stop flirting with the new student".

The rest of the class laughed at the sheepish blond until Kakashi smacked his desk again to restore order.

Sakura endured the hour-long lecture on some ridiculously archaic book. She vaguely recognized the title and had she cared enough, she could have probably remembered the plot. Instead, she spent her time writing copying the notes on the board and then recopying everything in English. By the end of the period, the first three pages of her new notebook were filled with equally neat notes in two different languages. As the bell rang, Kakashi instructed the students to read the first three chapters of the book and write summaries of each section to be collected the next day. With a casual wave, he picked up his materials and left the room.

The classroom erupted into gossip once more. As the other students turned to friends to talk, Sakura skimmed through the first few chapters of her book. After a quick look, she easily remembered the characters and plot of the story. She flipped to a fresh page in her notebook and jotted down the summaries due for homework.

Naruto turned around again, mouth poised to speak. His bright blue eyes flickered down to her full page.

"Whoa, Sakura-chan! Did you just finish all the homework for Kakashi-sensei?" he blurted out. The classroom went silent as all eyes turned to Sakura once more.

Sakura's expression didn't change, but she silently cursed Naruto from the very depths of her soul. She continued to write, knowing that there were too many people watching her.

"I've already read the book before… I figured it would be easier to finish now," she quietly explained as she finished writing. After a minute, the low buzz of talking started up again and Sakura felt the prying eyes turn away. She let out a little sigh of relief. As she leaned over to tuck her notebook back into her bag, she felt the thin hairs on the back of her neck stand.

Someone was staring at her.

When she straightened, she thought she saw Uchiha Itachi's eyes watching her. She blinked to clear her vision. And she realized it was actually Uchiha Sasuke studying her.

She tried to smile, despite his blank expression.

"Um… hi. You're Uchiha-san, right? I guess we'll be seeing a lot of each other," she said, extending a hand. To her surprise, his dark blue eyes grew even colder. He scoffed a little with an arrogant tilt of his head.

"Why? Have you decided to join **them** already?" he shot back, jerking his chin towards the group of girls in the middle of the classroom. They were crowded around Yamanaka Ino's desk, giggling and waving at Sasuke. A girl with red hair and dark brown glasses met Sakura's eyes and gave her a venomous glare. Sakura tried to hold back the derisive snort that left her lips, but Sasuke still heard it. His head snapped around and his eyes widened as he watched the pink-haired girl **laugh at him**.

"Ah, the plight of a popular boy. Relax, I have no interest in people like you. I was just saying that since we're sitting next to each other, we might see each other a lot," she explained, trying her best not to break out snickering at the boy's arrogance. Sasuke frowned.

' _A person **like me**? What the hell does she mean by that?'_

Before he could demand anything else, Kurenai-sensei walked into the room, claiming everyone's attention. As she began a lecture on pre-calculus, Sasuke's focus was drawn from the new girl's puzzling words to long problems and trigonometric equations. After that, there was English with the ever-enthusiastic Maito Gai-sensei. As the only remaining heir of the Uchiha Zaibatsu, Sasuke was forced to pay extra close attention to everything. International relations called for fluid English. He had to excel, even if it meant staying awake through Gai-sensei's rather repulsive flourishes and trills.

* * *

When it was time for lunch, Naruto pounced on the brooding Uchiha and half-dragged him to the cafeteria to eat. Unsurprisingly, the blond was juggling four bowls of cup ramen and laughing about something trivial. Shikamaru and Chouji quickly joined them. They were cramped around one table, digging into the huge lunch that Chouji's mother had prepared for them, while they dodged half-chewed pieces of Naruto's ramen. Complaining, laughing and hitting each other, the old friends enjoyed lunch.

* * *

Back in the classroom, Ino, Karin and their friends shoved several desks together and ate their lunches. When they turned around to politely invite the new girl to join them, she was already gone.

"Where did she go?" Ino demanded. Her eyes turned to Karin, who shrugged as she popped a piece of shrimp in her mouth.

* * *

Up on the roof, Haruno Sakura threw her arms back and she let out a loud shout of frustration. She pulled at her new uniform, her bright pink hair and threw herself against the metal fence set up around the edges of the roof so nobody would fall over the edge. She kicked at the fence once for good measure. She half-heartedly chewed on the bread she had bought for lunch. It tasted lumpy and bland on her tongue.

The school was already suffocating and boring. Sakura thought back to her previous school. Students carried around weapons in their bags and punched each other without warning. At least one major brawl had to break out a week or somebody would start a fight simply to have someone to hate. Otogakure High School had been a terrible, violent and dangerous place.

And Sakura missed it dearly. She clung to the fence and heaved a giant sigh.

"This is stupid," Sakura muttered. After a quick peek over her shoulder, she contemplated climbing the fence and hopping over to the other side. It probably wouldn't be too difficult to climb back down three stories as long as she focused a little chakra to her fingertips. But she forced her body to stay still and remember that she had appearances to keep up.

Sakura took another bite of her ridiculously unappetizing lunch when her cell phone rang.

"I hate you," she snarled as soon as she answered. A loud guffaw exploded from the other end of the line. Kisame's obnoxious laughter was easy to recognize. The laughter grew fainter, like the phone was travelling away from the blue-haired man.

"Hime, how are things?" Akasuna no Sasori quietly asked. Sakura felt her meaningless anger deflate completely. She crouched down and raked her free hand through her long hair. She felt so damn irritated at everything. But it was neither the time nor the place to vent. Sasori's eternally calm voice reminded her of that fact.

"It's… miserable but manageable," she finally sighed.

"That's good. Did Kisame relay the news properly?"

Sakura's fingers froze between strands of pink hair. She sucked in a sharp breath as she remembered what her "guardian" had mouthed to her in the office that morning. It was suddenly a little too hot outside.

"_Hime… there's a new target tonight."_

To anyone else, it could have meant a million different things. But to Haruno Sakura, barely seventeen years old and wearing a public school uniform, it meant another sleepless night and more bleach filling her bathtub.

Finally, clenching her hands to hide the shaking, Sakura replied, "Yeah. I know. Where do I need to be?"

She hated that her voice wavered a little. She hated that Sasori had probably heard it. She hated that she felt the hot anxiety clenching at her throat as she waited for the reply.

And she really hated that things hadn't changed one bit since her first assignment four years ago.

"Why don't you just go home? I'll have a car pick you up at around 5," Sasori said. He carefully chose his words. It would be disastrous to reveal details only to find that their line had been tapped. Sakura exhaled through her nose. The nervousness faded to a raw gnawing in the pit of her stomach. She stuffed the rest of her bread back into the plastic bag. Looking at food suddenly made her feel sick to her stomach.

"Good luck," Sasori said and then he hung up. Sakura listened to the line crackle for a minute and then she slid her phone shut.

Burying her face in her hands, she took in a deep breath and waited for the bell to ring.

* * *

After a rather hectic lunch period, Sakura sank into her seat back in the classroom. She forced herself to sit up straight and not look as if she had just been given an assignment to ruin someone else's life forever. Over the course of a few minutes, the students trickled back into the room, some still munching on the last bites of their food.

Uchiha Sasuke was one of the last people to return to his seat. He shoved Naruto away, hiding a smirk. He paused to look over at Sakura. But something in her forced casual expression made him forgo speaking to her at all. He walked past and slouched in his chair, waiting for the history teacher to walk in.

Sakura carefully looked open and her eyes met with Sasuke's. She nonchalantly turned away, ignoring his eyes burning into the side of her face.

And for some reason, his expression made her really want to vomit.

She barely paid attention to the two afternoon classes. Instead, she sat in her seat, her shoulders a little too tense and her eyes trailing from the clock to her desk and to the window in a dizzying cycle. But the teachers simply assumed that Sakura, as a new student, was too shy to participate in class discussions. If they noticed her inattentiveness, they didn't say anything.

When the final bell rang, dismissing the school, Sakura practically ran out the door. Naruto turned around in his seat to ask her to hang out after school again. To his surprise, the desk was empty. He exchanged a confused look with Sasuke. And then, in a typical Naruto-fashion, he put on a wide grin and moved on to another topic.

* * *

Sakura was back at her apartment in less than 20 minutes. With trembling fingers, she unlocked the door and slipped into her new home. She fumbled around in the dark for a light switch, but she couldn't find anything. After bumping against a few boxes, she managed to stumble her way to the window and rip the curtains open. The sun had begun to sink below the horizon. The sky was a blur of purple and crimson with swirls of deep orange outlining the clouds. Sakura pressed her forehead against the sliding glass door and she forced herself to breathe deeply.

It was 4:15 pm.

Sasori's car would be there in forty-five minutes.

It was so hard to accept what she was about to do. But, gathering up courage from deep inside of her, Sakura pulled down a steel wall in her heart and closed off the feelings of guilt and fear. And a ritual that had been carved into her very soul began.

Sakura dropped her school bag onto the black leather couch. She stripped down to her underwear and hung up her uniform in her small bedroom so that it wouldn't be wrinkled the next day. She went into the kitchen and set a pot of water on the burner to boil. Then, stretching her arms as she walked, Sakura went to the bathroom and took a freezing shower. Her entire body ached with the cold and her teeth chattered until her jaw ached. But the icy water pouring onto her head helped clear her mind. It gave her clarity. There was no time to think.

She stepped out of the bathroom with a light blue towel wrapped around her body just as the water came to a boil. A packet of instant udon along with the bag of seasoning hissed as it hit the hot water. Sakura stirred the noodles once and turned down the heat. Steam rose into the air and a salty, slightly sweet smell permeated the apartment.

As she waited for her dinner to cook, Sakura pushed aside the street clothes in her closet. At the very end, behind the jeans and jackets, there were several articles of clothing that melted into the darkness. Sakura's chest tightened as she pulled out the black pants made of some sort of form-fitting synthetic material. Next was a black mesh shirt and a tight black tank top. After a little more rummaging, she found a pair of black boots that laced up all the way to her knees. She dressed quickly and then ran to turn off the stove as she heard the broth hissing angrily in the pot. She ate standing in front of the stove, gulping down the noodles and chewing without really tasting anything. The small pot and chopsticks were thrown into the sink for a later time.

It was 4:45 when Sakura sat on her bed, lacing up her boots and buckling straps. Her wet hair hung in her eyes when she reached down to secure the top buckle on each boot. The black clothing fit her perfectly, molding against every curve, insuring speed and practicality. She took time to blow-dry her hair and put on a heavy layer of eyeliner. She stood in front of the mirror, staring at the image of a cold-hearted woman ready to destroy another human being.

And the woman in the mirror smirked.

Sakura turned on her heel and grabbed her trench coat. She tossed it over her shoulder, walking in long, fluid strides. Just as she reached out for her cell phone, there was a sharp knock on her front door.

"It's time, Hime," a man whispered. And then heavy footsteps retreated down the walkway, down the stairs and towards the waiting car.

Without hesitation, she walked out of the apartment, close behind the unknown man whose sunglasses hid his face well even though it was after sunset.

It was so familiar.

He held the back door of the car open and waited for her to get in before circling around to the driver's side and starting the car. They drove onto the highway, watching as the street lights flickered to life and bathed the streets in a soft shade of orange. Sakura took a deep breath and watched the world flash past. She clenched her hands together, waiting and watching.

All the while, she felt her heart race, anticipating the events that would unfold that night.

And a faraway part of herself felt sick to her stomach again.

* * *

Reviews are very appreciated and helpful! Any suggestions or comments are also encouraged.

I'll try to make this a weekly thing so wish me luck.


	2. Anachronism

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 2: Anachronism

It was an easy mission.

Or at least, it was supposed to be easy.

The driver had pulled up in front of an old antique shop. He handed Sakura a thick manila envelope that held a file on some rich business tycoon who apparently owed a large sum of money. Two blocks away, he was sitting in an elegant restaurant eating stuffed lobster and drinking ridiculously expensive wine. A few friendly visits hadn't convinced him to cough up the dough he obviously had the ability to pay off.

That was where Sakura came in.

She read the information, memorizing name and appearance along with some other facts before she resealed the envelope and handed it back to the driver to be disposed of. After a quick farewell, Sakura stepped out of the car and watched it speed away. It was still early spring so the air was a little chilly. Sakura tightened the Velcro of her black gloves and pulled on the white porcelain mask that had been waiting for her in the back seat of the car. The dark red tattoo etched into the skin above her heart seemed to grow a little hotter.

So, like the ink on her skin, Sakura became a spider. She let her body melt into the shadows of silent buildings. The heavy weight of the katana on her back was comforting as she slipped down a narrow alley and focused a small amount of chakra to her hands. Wedged between the two brick walls, she barely had enough room to turn around in a circle. But it was just wide enough for her to stick her hands to the walls and quickly scale the side of the building. There was a loud snap from the street, making Sakura flinch. She bolted up the wall and swung her legs over the edge of the roof just as a bulky figure peered into the alley.

Sakura gave herself a minute to calm down when her earpiece crackled a little. She waited for the transmission.

"Hime… the target will leave the restaurant soon. He's just called for the check," a young man's voice hissed. Sakura let out a little sigh.

"Thanks…Ukon?" she replied, unsure as to which twin it was. There was a low chuckle.

"Naw, it's Sakon. Good luck, Hime."

Sakura heard the earpiece buzz again and then it went silent.

She took a deep breath and then she began running. Haruno Sakura had always been a runner. Before she had even learned to multiply and divide, she had been running. Long-distance runs were the perfect time to clear the mind and just run for the hell of doing something physical. So when Sakura ran, there was nothing around her. There was the wind whipping against her face and the crunch of concrete under her boots.

When she came to the edge of the roof, she jumped. There was no hesitation and no fear. When she came to another edge, she jumped again. Each step closer to the restaurant brought the steel wall in her mind closer to sealing up the other side of her mind. The gears screeched and ground against each other while a voice in her head screamed for her to stop. The voice begged her not to go. It begged her not to hurt anyone anymore.

So Sakura didn't feel sorry at all when she felt the wall finally block out the part of her that was afraid. She felt the familiar anxiety and excitement and she pushed her legs to go a little faster. She could almost taste the adrenaline in her mouth. It was hot and metallic and bitter and it intoxicated her. When the posh restaurant came into view, Sakura felt her heart pounding in her ears. Her lips, acting of their own accord, pulled up into a vicious smile.

"I'm here," she murmured, knowing that the microphone hooked onto the strap of her bra would pick up the sound.

"Target is leaving the premises," Sakon croaked, his voice tense with excitement.

Sakura looked down at the building across the street. She scanned the faces of the portly, well-dressed customers leaving the restaurant. Some of them shook meaty hands while others exchanged business cards. After a moment, Sakura spotted the balding head and the suspicious briefcase she had been looking for. Her eyes were glued to the man as he greeted his fellow business partners and then started walking the two blocks to his car. She kept close to the edges of the roofs as she moved with him. Each of his cocky steps was met with another one of Sakura's silent lunges. As dull as he looked, he seemed to sense something. He stopped just as he was about to open his car door to look up. He glanced around the nearby streets and then looked up at the sky. This seemed to relieve him of his suspicion. He gave a satisfied nod, as if doing so had just vanquished an evil demon.

His fat fingers reached for the car door again and then Sakura took a running jump and landed on the roof of his car. The force of her impact dented the imported metal. The fat man seemed to cry out in pain as he watched the expensive Italian car crackle and scuff under the soles of Sakura's boots. It took him an extra second to process the girl actually on the car.

"Wh-What the hell have you done to MY CAR? YOU BITCH!" he bellowed, swiping at her with his keys wedged between his fingers. Sakura moved slightly to avoid the jagged edges of metal. She was in a crouch, balancing on the balls of her feet. Her lips parted in a sneer that revealed her even, white teeth. It was then, it seemed, that the man actually realized what danger he was in. He looked from side to side, frantically searching for one of his business partners to defend him. To his horror, everyone was already gone, taking their muscled bodyguards with him. His eyes slowly dragged back to the long-haired demon on his precious car. Her hair shone silver in the bright moonlight that poured down on the street.

"Hello, Fujimura-san," she greeted as if they were meeting for a casual lunch. She reached behind her. With a crisp click, she began to pull her katana from his ornate sheath. The man's eyes bulged as he tried to calm his breaths.

"I hope you enjoyed your dinner tonight. I've heard good things about that restaurant," Sakura continued, her tone light and pleasant. In one smooth motion, she swung her katana in the air and pointed it toward the restaurant. Her leer only widened when the man began to cry. His little whimpers sounded like a wounded dog crying for help.

"I see that you realize why I'm here. My associates and I were very concerned when you didn't return our calls," she said. Fujimura fell to his knees, sweating and shaking.

"Please! Pleasepleaseplease! I have a family! I have four kids! Please! I have to raise them! I can't die yet! Please give me some time!" he sobbed, throwing himself upon the ground. Sakura rubbed at the blade of her sword with a thoughtful expression. She regarded the sniveling man for a moment and then she eyed her lovely katana again. Moonlight glinted off the shiny metal and she caught sight of her cruel face reflected back at her. A far away part of her seemed to flinch.

When she opened her mouth to speak, there was a crackle in her ear. She expected Sakon to warn her about her actions. She prepared a few choice words as to where he could shove his cautiousness, someone else spoke.

"Sakura… You know protocol," a man murmured.

It was a voice she couldn't oppose. And the part of her outside the wall, the part that wanted desperately to beat the pathetic, crying, liar into the pavement until his brains spilled out, snarled.

"Fine," she snapped. Startled by the anger in the voice, Fujimura looked up. He saw the anger in her face and immediately feared the worse. But he was too frozen in fear to run away. Instead, his eyes were locked on her long fingers as she fiddled with the sharp sword in her hand. Finally, she met his gaze and the most sickening smile spread across her lips.

"Four kids, huh? I know Ami and Setsuna. There were two others? Or…are you… **lying to me**?" her voice was so silky and pleasant that it made her own skin crawl. Fujimura let out a choked squeak. Snot and tears mixed in slimy trails down his face. Sakura's smile faded as she hopped off of the car. She turned to the petrified man.

"You were given six months to pay. You were fully informed of the interest charges yet you agreed," Sakura recited as she remembered the information she had read just half an hour earlier. On the ground, Fujimura nodded furiously, like telling the truth would negate his lies.

"And… when my associates so _politely_ went to retrieve the money after six months… you begged and promised to pay in another week… This has gone on three times, Fujimura-san. We are people of business, you see. And we have to make a living too," Sakura said, her tone gentle again. She smiled again. Fujimura shuddered.

"So, I believe we have been more than reasonable. And I'm sorry to say… that your time is up."

In one swift motion, Sakura swung her arm in an arc to render the man unconscious. At the same time, he seemed to realize the danger he was in and scrambled to his feet. That was probably the biggest mistake he could have made. Sakura, with her deadly aim, would have knocked him out and given him some peace (at least, until he arrived at the place Sakura was going to take him). Instead, Sakura's eyes narrowed.

She flew at the pudgy man, her katana raised. Before he could run again, the handle of Sakura's katana smashed into the side of his face. Something cracked as he flew sideways, knocking into the door of his already damaged car. Blood began trickling from his face as Sakura advanced. Her katana was held out at arm's length, glistening. With a terrifying grin, the blade sliced through the air. Fujimura scrambled away again, tripping over his own feet. But he didn't move fast enough. The katana sliced cleanly through the backs of his ankles.

He hit the ground without as much as a scream. He was too frightened to make much more than a low moan. Out of the corners of blurry vision, he could see her black boots approach. His entire body tensed, ready for more pain, ready for another assault. Instead, she sighed. It was the sort of response you would give to a five-year-old throwing a tantrum about going to bed.

"Fujimura-san… this could have been so much easier. I was planning to knock you out so you would at least have a little peace. Since you've been bad, that's not going to happen. But if you make another noise…"

Suddenly, she was bending over to look right into his unfocused eyes. Her sharp green eyes screamed death. The metallic smell of blood clogged his nostrils and filled his mouth with bile.

"…I'll cut out your organs one by one. And then I'll find your family and I'll be sure to give them the same wonderful treatment," she whispered.

Fujimura let out a strangled sob. Fresh tears streaked down his cheeks as he furiously shook his head. She smiled, revealing her perfect teeth again.

"Good. Then we'll have to get going," she said, her voice pleasant again. She slid the clean katana back into its sheath and dusted off her hands. Without much effort, she picked up the portly man and sat him up against the side of his car. She produced a strip of black fabric from nowhere. She used it to cover his eyes, making a neat bow in the back. After a second of thought, she used another rag to tie up his ankles. This would prevent the blood from dripping all over the place. Then, without another word, she picked him up, like a giant dead animal and threw him over her shoulder. She smirked.

"Target procured. Bring the car around. And get a clean-up crew. There's a teensy bit of blood on the pavement and I need this car destroyed," she said. There was a harried sigh at the other end.

"Geez, Hime. You're too good at this. Can I have the car? It's a Ferrari, right?" Sakon said.

"Sakon," she barked. Her voice was suddenly as sharp as her sword.

"Sorry, Hime. I'll send someone over right now. We'll have the car disposed of," he replied. With another buzz, the line went silent again. Fujimura wheezed a little, obviously crying again.

Sakura carried the large man about two blocks when she spotted a nondescript gray van parked on the side of the road. The headlights barely flickered on and off to signal her. When she approached, the driver stepped out of the vehicle and scrambled to open the back door.

"Quick work, Hime," he said as he helped Sakura carry the victim over. He grunted as he heaved Fujimura into the back of the van and then closed both doors. The driver glanced over at once, not meeting her eyes.

"Do you need a ride, Hime?" he asked. Out of the corners of his eyes, he saw Sakura give a jerky nod. Without another word, they both climbed into the front seats of the van. The driver had left the engine running and immediately began heading in the direction he had come from. Sakura sat in the passenger seat, about as expressive as a marble statue. After a couple minutes of silence, Fujimura, seemingly resigned to his fate, gathered the courage to speak.

"What… what's going to happen to me?" he whispered in a hoarse voice. Sakura barely glanced back at him. She looked bored as she thought of what to say.

"Nothing that you don't deserve," she finally replied, effectively shutting him up. The driver bowed his head a little, feeling the weight of her terse words.

It took about an hour to get to the huge warehouse by the docks. The van screeched to a halt in front of a cargo bay. Sakura motioned for the driver to stay put as she slid out of her seat and walked around to open the back door. But when she reached the back, she was met with an unexpected guest.

"Good work today, Hime," Akasuna no Sasori quietly greeted as he leaned over to give her temple a light kiss. Sakura would have normally taken this as a huge complement and beamed. Sasori was definitely on her list of favorite people. But her pleasantry switch was not on that day. In fact, that had been locked away behind the steel wall in her head along with her sympathy and the little voice that pleaded for peace and quiet. Sasori saw the hard look in her eyes and seemed to understand. He studied the pudgy man lying on his side on the cold metal floor of the van. His honey-colored eyes lingered on the crude bandage.

"You've injured him," Sasori pointed out. Although his tone was quiet and even, Sakura heard his irritation.

"I could have gutted him. You're lucky," she sniffed, not meeting his piercing eyes. Sasori stared at her and finally let out a sigh.

"Yes, you're quite right," he relented. He dragged Fujimura by his pant leg to the edge of the truck and then dumped him onto the hard concrete ground. The captive let out a breathless whimper and then fell silent. Even though Sakura wasn't exactly in the most affectionate state of mind, she leaned against Sasori and he gave her a light hug.

"Drive Hime back," Sasori called up to the driver, who gave a nod. Then, turning back to the girl in his arms, he couldn't help but sigh again.

"Where are you going tonight?" he carefully asked, knowing how bristly she could be. Sakura's icy green eyes turned up to him.

"Shut up." Her two-syllable answer was cutting, letting him know that she wasn't happy with him at all. Sasori's arm squeezed a little, not hard enough to hurt, but enough to remind her of where the hell she was and who she was talking to. Sakura's glare softened a little.

"Sorry… I know…. I'm sorry. I'm just all messed up right now," she whispered. This time, Sasori's arm tightened around her, but it felt comforting rather than reprimanding. Sakura was quiet for a long time. They stood, watching, as a big, muscular man emerged from the warehouse and bowed low to them. He then dragged Fujimura by the collar of his shirt into the building to be "processed". Sasori shook Sakura a little.

"Hime, you should go home," he ordered without much conviction because he already knew what her answer was going to be.

"I can't… It's too cold," Sakura replied, not referring to the temperature of her apartment. At first, Sasori protested a little and tried to sway her to listen (for once) but Sakura was too tired, too angry and too scared to listen. So, with a reluctant sigh, Sasori released the girl and kissed her cheek.

"Sleep tight, Hime."

And for the first time that night, she smiled at him.

"You know I won't, Sasori," she simply said before she pressed her lips against his cheek and then climbed into the van. The red-head watched the van rumble down the street and then turned to find Kisame watching him from the back entrance of the warehouse.

"Our poor Hime," Kisame sighed. And nothing else needed to be said.

Sasori didn't comment. Instead, he trudged back into the warehouse and got down to the business for that night.

* * *

There was a specific building about a 20-minute drive from Sakura's own apartment. From an outside glance, it looked like any other place. It fit in perfectly with its neighboring office buildings and apartment complexes. But when the driver dropped Sakura off at the place, he gave the place a nervous glance and hurried away.

It was headquarters.

Instead of using the front doors (which led to a normal-looking apartment complex), she snuck up into the side alley and knocked on a thick metal door. She could feel eyes on her back, watching from several hidden locations. After a moment, there was a metallic groan as the titanium-enforced door opened.

"Hime," an unknown man greeted as he bowed to her. His dark hair covered his right eye when he straightened to full height. Sakura's mouth tightened into a frown as she waited for him to move aside. But he remained an immovable fixture in the doorway. He was obviously new if he didn't realize how close to dying he truly was at that moment. Sakura's hand twitched as she considered using her katana. But before she could decide, there was a swift movement behind the man and Sakura's problem was knocked to the ground.

"Move, fucking asshole. Hime's waiting outside!" Hidan barked. Sakura stepped inside and although she usually had very little love for the silver-haired man, she smiled at him.

"Thank you, Hidan," she quietly said. Hidan turned to her, ready to give her some lewd comment and then start his usual game of trying to offend her. That night, however, he seemed to notice her outfit and the strange look in her eyes. He swallowed his words.

"Is he here?" Sakura inquired. It didn't take a rocket scientist to figure out who she meant. There were only three people in the entire world Sakura would ever completely rely on and one of them was currently missing. Hidan couldn't bring himself to be mean to her that night.

"Still out. You can go ahead though," he muttered, letting her pass.

Sakura thanked him again as she slipped past him and walked down the hall. The dark red walls seemed to waver a little with each step Sakura took. Her head was too chaotic to actually lead her to the room she desperately wanted to be in. Instead, her mind wandered as her feet automatically moved.

The narrow hallway led to a spiraling flight of stairs that led all the way to the third floor. The climb was a boring one with nothing but gray walls and equally gray steps to look at. At the very top of the stairs was heavy steel door with no handle. Sakura molded chakra to her fingertips and slid her hand down right side of the door. There was a loud click and then the door swung open. The dark wood floors reflected pools of soft orange light from the elegant sconces on the walls. The crimson wallpaper swirled around her and she sucked in a deep breath.

There were ten doors in total that led to bedrooms. An eleventh door led to a large kitchen as well as a study and a conference room. Hidden somewhere in the place was another flight of stairs that led to the top floor. But that top floor had always remained a mystery to Sakura and she knew better than to pry. The third door from the right was locked, but Sakura knew that before she even touched the metal knob. She knew where the key was and how to open the lock so that the booby traps wouldn't be set off. But the room had sat empty for nearly ten years and Sakura had never been able to bring herself to open the door.

So for the 57th time, Sakura walked away from the door and instead slipped into the room two doors down. She had been in this particular room so many times that she didn't even need to turn on the lights. Instead, she slipped off her boots and lined them up next to the door. In one fluid motion, she tossed her black jacket on a black leather armchair along with her katana. She pulled off her mesh shirt, leaving only her tank top and tight black pants. The microphone and earpiece were thrown on top of her clothes.

"Sakura?"

Sakura didn't even have to look to see who it was. But her eyes were automatically drawn to him. He was wearing a white wife beater under a black leather jacket. The knee of his black jeans was torn and his black shoes were scuffed. His dark hair hung in his face, free from its usual ponytail. His red eyes took in her clothes and her weary expression.

"Why are you here?" he asked, even though he didn't expect an answer. Sakura held his gaze for a moment and then she went into the adjoining bathroom to wash her face free of make-up. The spare toothbrush she kept in the bathroom was still sitting in the ceramic cup next to his. He walked in the room and leaned against the doorway as he watched Sakura brush her teeth.

When she was finished, she brushed past him to climb into the king-sized bed.

He sighed. He was powerless against her.

So Uchiha Itachi changed his clothes, brushed his teeth and climbed into bed beside the girl. She was curled up on her side facing him. In the dim light that filtered through the window, he could see that she was crying. Her tears ran in glittering trails down her cheeks and soaked into the pillow. Itachi's long fingers touched her face, wiping away the moisture.

"Is… he dead?" she asked in a quivering voice. Itachi's grim expression answered her question.

"I hate you," she whispered. Fresh tears stung the corners of her eyes. She hated him for being so understanding and gentle. She hated Sasori for being so compassionate. She hated her life where she was forced to make people like Fujimura suffer. She hated herself for caring.

Itachi pulled her close and felt her tears warm his skin.

The steel wall in Sakura's mind fell away. And the voice that had been suppressed for so long tore free with a shrill scream.

'_MURDERER! YOU'RE A MURDERER! WHY DID YOU DO IT? WHY?'_ it wailed. Sakura shuddered and Itachi's arms tightened around her.

"I want to die," she whimpered against his chest.

It was a little before 10 pm when Sakura had first arrived in Itachi's room. But it was past midnight when Sakura finally drifted to sleep in the older man's arms.

* * *

The sun wasn't out when Sakura regained consciousness. She hadn't slept. She had passed out from sheer emotional exhaustion. She pressed her face against the clean cotton sheets and she inhaled. There was a quiet rustle from somewhere nearby. Even though her entire body protested, Sakura sat up and she half-opened her eyes.

"It's four, Sakura. Go back to sleep," Itachi murmured. The mattress dipped as Itachi sat on the bed next to her. Sakura shook her head and then wrapped the blanket around her body. Itachi's lips pulled into what might pass for a smile.

"Nii-san…" she mumbled as she reached out with her hand. After a moment, she found Itachi's warm, calloused hand.

"Go back to sleep," he repeated. With his free hand, he smoothed back her soft pink bangs. The ends of her hair reached down past her shoulder blades. Sakura lay back down and silently watched Itachi pull on his white dress shirt and button the cuffs. When he had gathered his jacket and his cell phone, he turned one last time to look at her. Sakura's big green eyes were no longer sleepy. She watched his every move with startling intensity.

And the cold determination from the previous night had faded from her gaze.

Satisfied, Itachi touched her forehead and then left the room, closing the door behind him.

* * *

The second time Sakura woke, she was curled up on her side and there was someone else in the room. This time, Sakura didn't open her eyes. But she felt the hand against the side of her face and she knew who it was.

"Sasori," she simply said.

There was a low chuckle and the hand fell away.

"It's 6:30, Hime. I will escort you home. You will have a busy day at school today," Sasori said.

True to his word, Sasori drove Sakura back to her apartment in his shiny new car. Even in her sleep-dulled state, Sakura had enough energy to remind herself that she was still a little angry at the world. But when the red-head even took time to walk her up the flight of stairs to the door of her apartment, she felt the vestiges of her anger slip away. She was still wearing the outfit from last night with her katana slung over one shoulder and her jacket draped over her shoulders.

Sasori squeezed her hand.

"The payment for last night has been transferred," he informed her. Sakura's face pulled into a tired smile.

"Go, Sasori. I can't be near you right now," Sakura replied, easing out of his grip. Even though Akasuna no Sasori could have easily killed her with one jerk of his hand, instead, he bowed to her and took his leave.

Once she was in her new apartment, Sakura washed the leftover dishes from the night before. She took a hot shower to cleanse away the smell of Fujimura's cologne and the soothing scent that clung to her body after spending a night in Itachi's bed. She scrubbed her skin, trying to wash away the events of the previous night. The automatic coffee maker brewed a fresh pot of strong, black coffee, filling the apartment with the rich smell. As soon as she was out of the shower, Sakura fished a cigarette out of her bedroom drawer and had a nice, long smoke. The heady scent of French cigarettes soothed her nerves as she dressed and dried her hair. After two cups of hot, acrid coffee, Sakura doused her cigarette in the sink and brushed her teeth.

At 8:00 am, Sakura picked up her school bag and left the apartment.

She forced herself to smile twenty minutes later when she walked through the school gates. She waved to a few people she recognized from her class. At her locker, she swapped her shoes for indoor canvas slippers. She followed the steady stream of students to the classrooms and took her seat in the back of the room.

When Uchiha Sasuke walked in to sit down beside her, Sakura smiled so hard that she thought her jaw might break.

She spent the whole day smiling and responding to her classmates' friendly attempts at conversation. The day was tiring and she begged for it to be over.

So at the end of the day, as she entered her apartment, she threw her things across the floor, fell to her knees and sobbed until she thought her heart would burst from her chest.

She really wished it would.


	3. Mood

Sorry, guys, but this chapter is a bit shorter than usual. I've been kind of lazy since summer vacation is just starting. I promise that next chapter will be better because honestly, this chapter is pretty horrible. It's a little slow but it's necessary to get the plot moving along.

Enjoy! And before I forget again, Naruto and all related characters are the property of Masashi Kishimoto.

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 3: Mood

The entire week was miserable.

Friday afternoon, still stewing in her foul mood, Sakura lay on her stomach in the grass during gym class. She watched some of the other students play a quick game of soccer. Uchiha Sasuke scored a goal against the other team.

How shocking.

What was startling was that after her won, Sasuke walked straight over to her and sat next to her. Sakura reluctantly sat up, mussing her long pink hair. She watched Sasuke casually drink some water and then wipe the sweat off his forehead with the back of his hand. Sakura wondered if he was really oblivious to Yamanaka Ino and her friends staring at him or he was ignoring them. At any rate, she was confused, annoyed and not in any mood to deal with him.

"Can I help you, Uchiha-san?" she asked. She didn't have the energy to give him a fake smile.

"You were alone," he replied without meeting her gaze. Sakura frowned.

"Ooh, big shock," was her snippy reply. Sasuke looked amused as he glanced over at her. Her glare intensified.

"You're not flirting with me…. Or trying to confess your undying love," he suddenly commented. Sakura hated the way his eyes lit up with interest. She inwardly pleaded for him not to say what she thought he might say. She cringed as she anticipated his next words.

"You're… interesting, not annoying like the other girls. Want to be my girlfriend?" He said all this in a tone that implied that his offer was some sort of great honor. A nonchalant smirk was on his face, like he knew what her response would be.

'_Damn,'_ Sakura thought.

She felt Sasuke watching her. She felt Hyuuga Neji staring at her from across the field. She felt the angry gazes of fan girls burning into the back of her head.

'_Goddamnit.'_

Scraping up some amount of patience and civility, Sakura turned to Sasuke.

"I'm sorry. I'm going to have to decline."

Sasuke's smug expression fell. His eyes went wide, making him look like a bewildered child.

"Why?"

'_What do you mean, 'why?' dumbass?'_

"I can't date someone I barely know. I met you four days ago. Besides, you're not my type," Sakura replied through gritted teeth. Her nasty mood had brought her other personality close to the surface. She was creatively dubbed 'Inner Sakura' and she was the one who enjoyed those late-night assignments. She loved to fight, she loved to scare people and she hated pretty much everybody.

Sakura hated her.

"What is your type then?" Sasuke probed, genuinely curious. It became clear to Sakura that this boy had never been denied anything before. His eyes demanded an explanation. Sakura felt her other persona sigh.

'_Let me handle this.'_

Very reluctantly, Sakura let her control slip. Like a cat waking from a long nap, Inner Sakura stretched and filled their head.

A half-smile touched her lips, making the hairs on the back of Sasuke's neck stand.

"I prefer something a little less… tame," she finally said. With a polite nod of her head, Sakura stood and stalked off to the other end of the field.

'…_..Thanks… for once.'_

Just when she thought that the worst was done, Hyuuga Neji jogged over. She resisted the urge to roll her eyes. He was handsome enough but his long, well-groomed hair, smooth, soft hands and his designer sneakers were more than enough to repulse her.

"Haruno-san," he politely greeted. Sakura gave a respectful sort of nod. She crossed her arms over her chest and stared off into the distance, determined to give off an air of 'I don't want to talk to you right now'. Neji seemed to carefully gather his words. As he opened his mouth to speak, the teacher blew the whistle and shouted for the girls to play.

Without another word, Sakura ran off to join her team.

'_Are you playing?'_ Sakura asked herself. Inner Sakura smirked as she stretched her arms and legs and jogged in place to get her heart pumping.

"It's time to get dirty," Inner Sakura replied out loud. And, with a weary sigh, Sakura let her play.

To put it lightly, Sakura kicked ass. She didn't talk and she didn't hog the ball. But every time she got near the goal, the ball sailed past the goalie's hands into the net. She was fast on her feet and her aim was deadly. The force of her deadly kicks drew attention from the boys resting on the sideline.

After 10 minutes, the score was 9-1. Exhausted and humiliated, the other team gladly left the field to get some water. Sakura's teammates congratulated her as they passed. Yamanaka Ino (although grudgingly) even commended her skills.

'_Chemistry next.'_

"Boooooring," Inner Sakura drawled as she slipped to the back of their shared mind, pushing the normal Sakura to the front. With a sigh of relief, Sakura followed the other girls to the locker room, trying her best to ignore the stares that trailed her.

* * *

At 4:08 pm, Sakura was walking out of school. She felt the two presences trailing her but she feigned ignorance. After a quick trip to the bank, she stopped at the grocery store. There were eyes following her as she examined vegetables and walked up and down aisles. When she passed a large ramen display, she noticed the two boys hiding… poorly. She sighed.

Why were Uchiha Sasuke and Hyuuga Neji following her?

As she walked back to her apartment, her plastic bag holding dinner in one hand, her cell phone rang.

"Hi," Sakura quickly said into the receiver. Noting her terse greeting, Sasori grew concerned.

"Is someone following you, Hime?" Sasori demanded.

"Yup. Don't worry. It's just a small problem," she replied. Sasori didn't sound happy but he backed down.

"There's a small assignment. We need you to handle one of our underlings. He's been selling information to our rivals in Sound. He's got a spy higher up but we can't figure out whom."

Sakura stopped in front of her apartment, acutely aware of her two unwelcome guests watching her from behind a tree.

"Hm… when?" she said, trying to sound as casual as possible.

"Tonight at 10. I'll pick you up personally."

"Sure. Bye," she said and hung up without waiting for a response. Tucking her phone into her pocket, she unlocked her mailbox and grabbed the envelopes before slipping into her home.

Her sneakers squeaked as she fumbled around for the light switch. She tossed her bag on the sofa and changed into a pair of sweatpants and long-sleeved shirt. Rolling up her sleeves, she unpacked her groceries and set a pot of boiling water to boil. She sliced up a few tomatoes, some garlic and an onion and let them simmer. When the big pot came to a boil, she poured in a box of linguini and added a handful of salt.

Twenty minutes later, she was curled up on the couch eating her dinner and finished up the rest of her math homework. It was 6:30 pm when she washed the dishes and tidied up her apartment.

She showered, feeling the familiar anxiety build in the pit of her stomach. She cut her nails and even took time to paint them black. While the nail polish dried, she took a quick nap.

It was 8:00 pm and she had nothing left to do. So she read her mail and vacuumed the living room.

Still just 8:25.

She did some stretching and dried her hair.

8:47.

She dressed slowly. Tonight wasn't a night for stealth. Tonight, she had to get answers. So the anxious knot in her chest wasn't as big as usual. She didn't feel the urge to scream or break things. She just felt hollow.

Sakura fell asleep staring at the clock. She was startled awake when there was a knock on the door.

"Hime… it's me," Sasori said. Sakura grabbed her katana off the bed and followed Sasori to his car.

It was a quick task.

The traitor sobbed and swore on his life that he didn't know who the spy was. He kneeled on the floor, claiming that he had worked through an informant. After nearly losing one of his ears, he had stuck to his story. After getting a name, Sakura let Hidan into the room and left before the screaming started. She knew that he would die. Pein hated disloyalty and Hidan hated leaving people alive. There would be no mercy for the traitor.

Inner Sakura reasoned that it was what he deserved. Sakura earnestly tried her best to believe that. It was easier to believe a lie. It was easier to forget.

To forget.

* * *

Over the next several days, Sakura noticed Sasuke and Neji continually trailing her. They were there when she stopped by a convenience store to buy a newspaper. They were there when she walked to and from school. They never failed to show up whenever she went out in public.

It wasn't that annoying.

Until they nearly caught her talking to Kisame.

She easily pretended that she was only talking to her guardian. She steered conversation towards their "family" and the weather and her new school. Kisame seemed to get the hint and he complied. After a few extra minutes, he handed over a thick envelope, calling them "family photos".

They were really profiles on every single student in her class at school. They recorded everything from birthplace to the places the people were most likely to be at during any given time. In particular, she found Uzumaki Naruto, Hyuuga Neji and Uchiha Sasuke to be the most interesting.

"Members of the Konoha Team during the Annual International Martial Arts Tournament," Sakura read as she lounged on the floor in the living room. Her eyes flickered over some more information until something caught her attention again.

"So… Uchiha has a rivalry with the Sand Team…" Sakura muttered. She picked up her cell phone and dialed a number she knew by heart, even though wasn't in her phonebook.

"Zetsu," she said when the other end of the line stopped ringing. There was a low grumble.

"Sorry, were you sleeping?" Sakura asked, feeling bad for him. Zetsu was always out gathering information. He hardly slept and when he did get the opportunity, it was not a wise decision to disturb him. But like anyone else in Akatsuki, he had a soft spot for her.

"What's wrong, Hime?" he mumbled, his voice still rough from sleep.

"I need you to gather information on the Sand Team for me," she said. Zetsu mumbled something under his breath and then he cleared his throat.

"Talk to Uchiha. You're going somewhere with him tonight," he replied. Sakura's eyebrows shot up.

"Really? Well… thanks, then. Sorry for waking you up."

"Night, Hime," Zetsu yawned before hanging up.

True to his word, about an hour later, Itachi called.

"Hime, get dressed. I'm taking you to a fight tonight," Itachi ordered, his voice typically stern. Sakura sighed into the receiver. She rolled onto her stomach and groaned, thinking of all the lecherous, fat men she would have to greet and act civil towards.

"Wear something fancy. I'll be there at 8," Itachi instructed, ignoring her grumbling.

Sakura forced down a dinner of cup ramen and took a hot shower. She dug through her closet and at the very end, behind her favorite gray parka, she found her fancy dresses. After a few minutes of extreme indecision, she settled on a strapless black piece that ended just above her knee. The back laced up like a corset, one that she struggled with for several minutes until she managed to use her teeth and fingers to tie it tightly. She tried a few different hair styles in the mirror before she left it alone, sleek and shiny and perfectly straight.

Itachi was a few minutes early but she was still unhappy about being dragged along to the fight so she made him wait outside. She outlined her eyes in smoky gray and dusted the same shade along her upper eyelid. After a coat of red lipstick, she dumped her cell phone and wallet in a black purse before hurrying outside to join Itachi. It was raining and unsurprisingly, he was ready with an umbrella. Itachi was always prepared for everything. He looked over her outfit and gave a nod of approval before he led her out to the car.

The thirty minute drive was quiet but not because it was uncomfortable. Sakura was happy to listen to the quiet purr of Itachi's car and listen to the rain beating down on the windshield. When they arrived at the abandoned warehouse, Itachi parked but he didn't make any move to get out. Sakura gave him a questioning stare.

"Hime, Zetsu told me you asked about the Sand Siblings," Itachi began. Sakura blinked several times.

"They're siblings?" she demanded. Itachi slowly nodded, wary of her thoughtful expression. Sakura didn't say anything. She settled for staring out the window, thinking.

"We should go inside," Itachi finally said after a few minutes. Sakura very reluctantly agreed. She forced a nonchalant expression as they passed the bouncer and descended the steps into the fighting arena. The general roar of chatter filled the underground stadium. In the very middle of the room was a raised platform. There were already to contestants beating each other to death on the platform, reeking of blood and sweat. The entire room thrummed with tension and excitement. Sakura could almost taste the adrenaline pouring from the audience and the fighters.

Just a year ago, it would have been her standing in the ring.

**The Black Widow**. The name had been whispered among the crowd each time she had mounted the platform and faced off a new adversary. It had been intoxicating. The blood, the pain, the suffering, and the victory and the feel of crisp dollar bills being shoved into her hands as she staggered into the locker room to spit up blood.

All that had stopped of course when an opponent had smuggled in a knife to the fight and stabbed her in the chest. That was what the tattoo was for. To cover the ugly scar and to hide the ugly memory. After the incident, Itachi had forced her to stop fighting for good.

Sakura was frozen for a moment as she took in the sheer energy filling the room. If she thought hard enough, she could remember the feel of the hot stage lights beating down on the back of her neck and the low roar of the crowd each time she landed a blow.

Itachi took Sakura's hand, pulling her from her memories, and led her up the stairs to the VIP box. Inside were a few big-time gang lords and some extremely rich people looking for a quick thrill. Itachi and Sakura took their reserved spots in the very front row and watched as the two obviously inexperienced fighters took petty jabs at each other. It took a few minutes but one finally managed to smash his knee into his opponent's face, sending him sprawling. A roar of approval rose from the crowd as he was announced victor and the unconscious loser was carried out by his coach and a medic.

"Why are we really here?" Sakura whispered into Itachi's ear as they waited for the new fighters to enter the ring.

"We're scouting for potential recruits. You have sharp eyes, Hime," Itachi explained. As he spoke, Sakura spotted a lanky boy with messy silver hair walk out of the locker room. He was so skinny that his ribs stuck out as he climbed into the ring. His much more muscular opponent sized him up, laughing.

"Him," Sakura said, pointing at the thin boy. Itachi looked a little doubtful but he didn't question her decision. But after two minutes, the boy Sakura had chosen had completely destroyed his opponent, leaving him a bloody, gasping mess. Sakura couldn't help but smirk.

When he climbed out of the ring, Sakura met his gaze and beckoned him over. He stopped in front of the VIP box, his expression a little wary.

"I like you. Call me sometime," Sakura simply said as she pulled a white business card out of her purse along with one earring. It was a small, flat, black disk with a silver spider etched in the center. She pressed these things into his hand with a smile. He gave a jerky nod and then an equally stiff bow before hurrying off.

"You scared him, Hime," Itachi murmured as they watched him run.

"Oops," she retorted without an ounce of sincerity. But she forgot what else she was about to say when she spotted a flash of red hair approach the stage. At first, she thought it might be Sasori, but then she saw the burning green eyes outlined in black and she almost forgot to breathe. His very presence was suffocating. His lip curled into a sneer as he eyed his opponent. He was shirtless, leaving the audience a very clear view of his perfect muscles rippling as he stretched his shoulders. Sakura sucked in a shaky breath.

"Who… who's that?" she demanded, her eyes glued to the red-head as he lunged at his opponent.

"That… ah, that's the youngest of the Sand Siblings. He's Sabaku no Gaara. He's… the same age as you, I believe," Itachi explained, also following the fight.

Sakura was captivated. He moved so fluidly in the ring as he dodged his opponent's blows. There was a sickening crunch as he blocked a punch and rammed his fist into his opponent's nose. Blood spurted into the air as the red-head continued to rain blows on his unfortunate victim. Eventually, the man collapsed on the floor of the ring, cowering and whimpering. The red-head smirked as the ref raised his right hand and announced his victory.

The arena exploded into applause.

And Sakura could barely contain her glee.

The next day was a Tuesday but Sakura didn't go to school. Instead, she unfolded the slip of paper she had received after the amazing match the previous night. It had taken some serious patience and persuasion, but after flashing her tattoo, the owner of the arena had given her the address of the red-head. She rolled out of bed, showered and munched on a piece of toast as she looked through her closet. Finally, she settled on a long white tank top and faded skinny jeans under a black hoodie. It was the beginning of September and it was starting to get chilly outside. Sakura hated the cold.

She tucked her cell phone into her back pocket, ready to head out. But she stopped. She couldn't stop smiling. Because she had found the answer to everything.

Thinking again, Sakura dialed a number and waited for the person to pick up.

"What the fuck! It's too early for this shit!" Hidan snarled as soon as he answered. Sakura would have cringed if she hadn't been accustomed to his foul language.

"Hidan, can I borrow your bike?" Sakura asked, ignoring his angry mumbling. But the cursing stopped as soon as he realized who it was.

"Ah, hime… Yeah, I'm not going anywhere today. It's at Hayate's Garage," Hidan replied in a much quieter voice. Sakura scrawled the name down on her hand with a pen and then thanked him before hanging up.

Hayate's Garage was famous in the underground for handling **everything**. Hayate was known for fixing cars will bullet holes without asking questions. He handled vehicles equipped with guns and flamethrowers without batting an eye. When Sakura walked into the garage, he greeted her with a rasping cough and a polite nod. She mentioned Hidan's name and his eyes went wide. He ushered her over to the sleek motorcycle with an extremely low bow.

Hidan's motorcycle purred like a giant cat when she started it up. It was painted black with swirls of silver running down the sides. The helmet was a little big but she tightened the strap around her chin and figured that it wouldn't kill her.

"Thanks," Sakura shouted over the motorcycle's engine to the mechanic as she sped off.

The place where Sabaku no Gaara lived was about 25 minutes away. That meant that Sakura got there in 15. When she pulled up in front of the address, she was surprised to find a rather large dojo. As she took off her helmet, Sabaku no Gaara, who had been sitting on the front porch, watched her. He was wearing a loose white t-shirt and a pair of sweatpants. He was leaning against a wooden beam, pressing an ice pack to his jaw. His bare feet rested on the wooden steps. Between his bruised knuckles was an unlit cigarette. To most people, he would have seemed relaxed, but his sharp green eyes took in Sakura's every move as she climbed off the bike and stuck the keys in her back pocket before walking over to him.

For some reason, he looked like a big lion staring down something he wasn't sure whether to welcome or to eat.

She smiled.

"Sabaku no Gaara, I have a deal for you."

* * *

Reviews please!


	4. Ignorant

Yay! One month anniversary! The plot is heating up as more and more about Sakura's elusive history is being revealed. And Gaara finally makes a real appearance! Thank you to all my loyal readers who review and encourage me to become a better writer!

Hope you all enjoy the latest chapter!

**Edit: And to readers, please check out the poll on my profile and give me some feedback. I'm really curious as to see what everyone thinks. Thanks in advance!**

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 4: Ignorant

Sabaku no Gaara stared up at Sakura like she was crazy.

He looked the pink-haired girl over once, his gaze calculating.

"I'm not here to threaten. I honestly just need to talk to you," Sakura said, her smile widening. Very reluctantly, Gaara stood and jerked his head, indicating for her to follow. Still cradling the ice pack against his face, he walked into the dojo. His strides were fluid and powerful as he stepped around a few people sparring and headed to a door in the back. Sakura shadowed him after she kicked off her shoes, her eyes taking in the obviously successful dojo. The gleaming wood floors squeaked against her bare toes.

There was an odd moment where she passed a man in his early twenties doing some basic judo kata. He was much taller and much heavier than her, but when he saw Sakura, his rough face froze into a numb stare.

"Jirobo," Sakura acknowledged with a dip of her head. Jirobo gaped for another moment. Finally, scratching his orange hair, he seemed to gather his wits. He stood up straight and bowed until his chest was at a 90 degree angle with his legs. When he straightened, Sakura was already catching up to Gaara again.

The back door led to a narrow hallway. There were separate doors for the men's and women's locker rooms. There was another door labeled "Employees Only" and another next to it without any sort of sign. Gaara opened the last one, revealing a set of wooden stairs.

Up on the second floor was apparently his home.

Or, that was what Sakura assumed. Her host was about as talkative as a deaf-mute. It was a nice place with gleaming wood floors, traditional rice paper doors and souvenirs from around the world arranged on the walls. Sakura took everything in while Gaara stood, analyzing everything she did. He crossed his arms over his chest, displaying impressive muscles. When Sakura turned to him, her eyes lingered on his perfect physique.

"So… this is your place," Sakura began, bringing her eyes back up to his face.

Without answering her, Gaara turned on his heel and went into another part of his house, leaving Sakura standing in the foyer. She considered following after him and smacking him upside the head for having no manners. But she stopped herself. After all, he was the perfect solution to all her problems. Instead, she reigned in her irritation and went to sit on the tan sofa in the living room. She took another minute to appreciate the tastefully decorated home. The wallpaper was a dark shade of teal that nicely contrasted the light wooden shelves and matching coffee table. After a moment, Gaara joined her with two glasses of orange juice.

'Okay… I take back the part about having no manners.'

He set a glass on the coffee table in front of Sakura and then lounged in an armchair across from her. He took a gulp from his own juice, his eyes never leaving Sakura. Finally, he put his glass down and leaned back in his seat.

He arched an eyebrow, obviously waiting for her to speak.

Sakura leaned forward, her eyes shining with barely suppressed glee.

"Are you a good liar?" she asked. Gaara's expression barely changed, but Sakura had spent enough time deciphering Uchiha Itachi's various emotions (or lack thereof). So it wasn't difficult for her to decipher his thoughts: He thought she was an idiot.

"Seriously," Sakura added, sensing his doubt. Gaara's intense green eyes burned into hers as he monitored her expression. He seemed satisfied by whatever he saw because he answered.

"…Yes."

"Wonderful because I'm going to need you to lie with me…. A lot," Sakura declared. She was unsurprised when Sabaku no Gaara glared at her.

"What?" he demanded in a venomous tone that would make the toughest man flinch. Sakura was quickly beginning to understand that this person was not the most eloquent… or willing to socialize.

"You don't recognize me, do you?" Sakura suddenly said, tired of being cautious. Almost immediately, Sabaku no Gaara's eyes narrowed. It felt like lasers might shoot of his eyes as he looked her over again with much more deliberation. Sakura smirked.

"I guess you might be too new to the area. You should know my name, though," she said as she unzipped her dark hoodie and pulled down at the collar of her tank top. The dark tattoo of a spider stood out against her light skin. And the bright red mark on the back of the arachnid made it easily recognizable as one of the most toxic spiders in the world. She loved the way the shock momentarily lit up his features as he processed the information. Sakura fixed her clothes and waited with a sly smile.

"I never thought I'd meet the Black Widow," he finally said, his tone slightly less disrespectful.

"Well, you have quite a reputation yourself, Sandman. I've done some research on you. You have an impressive record," Sakura said before she took a tiny sip of her juice. She let the flavor roll over her tongue and then when she was satisfied that it wasn't poisoned, she swallowed.

"So, I have these two people constantly following me. I may have stopped fighting underground, but I still have my own private affairs going on," explained Sakura as she swirled the remaining liquid around in the glass.

"I don't do assassinations," he cut in, his eyes fierce. Sakura stifled a snort of laughter at his burning expression.

"You're quick, but you're over thinking it. There would be a lot of people upset if I had the only sons of the Uchiha and Hyuuga families murdered. No. We're going to tease them," Sakura said, still smiling. She watched the gears turning in his head and then suspicion crept into his eyes.

"You have… Uchiha and Hyuuga following you… but you don't want to kill them," he slowly said. Sakura nodded.

"So… you want me to pose as your boyfriend?" Gaara said.

"You're smart. I knew I chose the right person for the job," Sakura simply commented. There was a long pause where neither of them spoke. Instead, Gaara scrutinized the girl sitting across from him.

"Oh and of course I don't expect you to do this for free. I hear your sister won't be able to fight in this year's tournament," the pink-haired girl added. Very slowly, Gaara nodded.

"Well, I would take her spot. And when you win first place, that would be a grand prize of one-hundred million yen*. What do you say?"

Her offer hung in the air, dangling a fortune in front of his nose. The money. The money would pay for so many things. It was a huge sum. It would maintain the dojo, pay for his older brother's college and pay his sister's medical bills. And as much as hated to put his trust in a stranger, he reluctantly extended his hand. Sakura practically beamed as she shook it.

"Perfect! You'll need my number so-"

And her cell phone rang. It was Sasori. That meant that there was another job. Her eyes darted from the caller ID to her new partner in crime. Her fingers hesitated for a moment and then she answered the phone.

"Hi."

"Hime, Danzo-sama has demanded your presence," Sasori said, his voice a little less composed than usual. Sakura's heart constricted and then sank to the soles of her feet. She could feel her face grow cold as all the blood drained from her cheeks. Her fingers gripped her phone a little too tightly to try and hide the fact that they were shaking.

Sakura sucked in a breath through her teeth before replying, "Oh…that was unexpected."

"Uchiha has offered to escort you," Sasori added, like he had almost forgotten to say so. Sakura felt the knot in her chest loosen a little.

"That's good. When?"

"He says he will pick you up at 6 pm," he said. Sakura took another deep breath, acutely aware of Gaara staring at her. He had picked up on her suddenly nervous tone and he was watching her every twitch with unnerving diligence. Sakura mustered a smile. She grabbed a pen off the coffee table and motioned for him to give her his hand. When he refused, she impatiently jerked his wrist towards her and began writing across the back of his hand.

"Okay. Actually, there's something I wanted to ask you about," Sakura said as she wrote her phone number across his skin. She tossed the pen back on the table and then mouthed the words 'text me later'. With a polite nod of her head, she walked down the stairs and out of the dojo. Once she was outside, she let out a deep sigh.

"Hime?"

"Sasori, can you arrange to have my motorcycle brought here?" Sakura asked as she leaned against Hidan's bike. The smooth chrome felt cool against her skin. There was a small pause and then Sasori asked her to wait for a moment. So she waited, tapping her fingers against the seat of the motorcycle and staring up at the dojo in front of her. Sasori picked up again.

"I'll send Kabuto over with it on Saturday morning. Anything else?"

"No. Thank you, Sasori," Sakura said and then Sasori hung up. With trembling hands, Sakura stuffed her phone into her pocket and put on her black helmet. She climbed onto the bike and started the engine, feeling the hot metal tremble against her body. She took off in a cloud of hot smoke and burning pavement. Speeding down the street, she let out a long scream of frustration that was drowned by the roar of the motorcycle.

**

* * *

**

Itachi was early, as usual. He slipped in to Sakura's apartment using his spare key. When he was greeted with an eerie silence, he immediately searched the entire place until he found Sakura lying on her back on her bed. Her eyes were still a little red from crying and her entire body was trembling. She had already changed into a burgundy cocktail dress and silver stilettos. The shiny fabric and the glittering shoes only accentuated how pale and fragile Sakura was. There was a cigarette clenched in her palm. Her silver lighter was in the other hand.

"I'm scared," she whispered, her eyes glued to the ceiling. Itachi sat on the edge of the bed. When he touched her cheek, Sakura finally met his eyes.

"I'm scared," she said again.

Itachi carefully pulled her into a sitting position, like she might shatter into a million pieces if he was too rough. He didn't make any empty promises and he didn't try to make her feel better. He pulled her close and held her until the shaking went away.

Afterwards, he sat on the bed and watched as Sakura finished getting ready.

She used eye drops to clear up the redness in her eyes. With a steady hand, she applied a layer of black mascara, some silver eye shadow and a coat of red lipstick.

"Hime," Itachi began, choosing his words carefully. Sakura turned as she put on a pair of dangling silver earrings. She would have looked perfect if she hadn't been frowning.

"When did you stop calling me by my name?" Sakura asked in a wounded tone.

"Should it matter? You are Sakura but you are also Hime," he replied, unruffled. Sakura pressed her lips together as she tried to contain her irritation.

"Liar," she replied without any venom in her voice. In fact, she didn't sound upset at all. She just sounded tired. She turned around and checked herself over in the mirror one last time. When she turned back, Itachi was standing. He looked impeccable in a black suit with a blue silk tie. Sakura tried her best to smile, but her lips wouldn't move naturally. Instead, she reached out and Itachi took her hand.

There was a twenty minute car ride. And neither of them spoke.

Sakura stared straight out the windshield with her hands folded in her lap. By the time they pulled up in front of the high class restaurant, Sakura had completely composed herself. All traces of fear were gone. When the valet went to park the car, she flashed him a demure smile that had him grinning like an idiot.

Inside the restaurant, they were greeted by marble floors and chandeliers hanging above every table. The walls were covered in dark wood and expensive paintings. The ceilings were covered in intricate mosaic tiles that made Sakura dizzy when she looked up.

"Welcome to Mont Blanc. Do you have a reservation?" the snooty maitre d asked with a belittling smile.

"Yes. Is Danzo-sama here?" Sakura asked with another smile. Immediately, the maitre d let out a strangled squeak.

"Oh of course! Right this way, please! I'm very sorry for holding you up," he babbled as he led them to the back of the restaurant. In a booth in the far back corner sat a person that made Sakura's skin crawl. Still, she continued to smile. Itachi and Sakura both bowed and then took seats across from Haruno Danzo.

"Good evening, Danzo-sama," Sakura greeted. Beside her, Itachi inclined his head. Danzo didn't even pretend to smile. He observed his daughter with an impassive look. He didn't even speak.

Haruno Danzo was a man in his early sixties. Despite his age, he was a handsome man. He had a sharp jaw and sharp brown eyes that judged everything he saw. His dark hair was going a little gray at the sides. Although he was physically attractive, his mere presence was enough to terrify someone. The weight of his stare was suffocating. So Sakura trembled at the mere thought of her father's name with good reason.

Danzo had already ordered food and wine for all three of them (although he was well-aware that his daughter was underage). When the waiter brought out their entrees, Sakura fumbled around under the table until she found Itachi's hand. He gave her fingers a faint squeeze, trying to reassure her.

Halfway through their individual filet mignons, Danzo suddenly looked up at Sakura.

"I have heard many good things about you, Sakura," he said, putting his fork and knife down. Itachi and Sakura copied him. No one ate while Danzo-sama wasn't. It was an unspoken rule.

"You are too kind, Danzo-sama," Sakura replied, bowing her head a little.

"My informants tell me that you are shaping up into a fine woman. That is why I have decided to name you as heiress to all my assets."

If anyone could have heard the inside of Sakura's head at the moment, they would have cried. There was a shrill, agonized screaming in Sakura's mind. Inner Sakura clawed at her own face and then she sobbed and sobbed until her throat was so sore that no sound came out of it at all.

But on the outside, she looked pleasantly surprised.

"I… I am honored, Danzo-sama. But I thought that position was supposed to be Onii-sama's," Sakura replied, suppressing the strong urge to throw furniture or to run far away.

Danzo's lip curled like he had smelled something repulsive.

"That child… is dead to me. You are my daughter and you will take my place running all that I own," Danzo replied in a firm voice. Sakura nodded. Danzo finished his dinner. Itachi did too. Sakura successfully picked at her food until it looked like she had eaten a lot of it. After a little agonizing small talk, Danzo announced that he had other plans for the night. He gave each of his dinner guests a nod before he strode off, his two bodyguards materializing out of nowhere to escort him.

Itachi and Sakura left a few minutes later. They drove in complete silence back to Sakura's apartment. Instead of simply dropping her off, Itachi parked his car and followed Sakura into her home. She barely had time to take off her shoes before she had to run to the bathroom and vomit the absurdly expensive dinner she had just eaten. Itachi crouched beside her, holding her hair back and rubbing her back when she began dry heaving. Afterwards, he supervised her brushing her teeth and washing her face. He helped her change into a pair of light blue pajamas, buttoning the shirt when her hands began shaking too much. And then, he stroked her hair until she fell asleep with a tear-streaked face.

**

* * *

**

Sakura didn't go to school the next day.

Or the day after.

Gaara texted her once to ask for her full name, school and home address. Sakura replied and then turned off her phone completely. She crawled back in to bed and slept. She woke up every few hours feeling exhausted, so she slept and slept until she was sick and tired of sleeping.

Itachi and Sasori were constantly dropping by to check on her. A few times, Kisame tagged along, cracking jokes and trying to make her smile. It didn't work. Konan visited once to leave a glass jar filled with folded paper cranes on her nightstand.

"My younger brother came to visit with that Hyuuga boy today," Itachi commented as he entered Sakura's bedroom. She was curled up on her side, staring at the white wall. Her eyes just barely flickered up to him.

"Phenomenal. He didn't see you?"

Itachi shook his head.

"Good," Sakura sighed and then she went back to sleep.

On the third day, Friday, Sakura finally woke up. It was 7:15 am when she checked the alarm clock. She took a hot shower and then toasted some bread while she dressed in her school uniform. It was sort of comforting to be absorbed in a process she was so familiar with: bra, underwear, white blouse, skirt and jacket.

Afterwards, she had a long smoke and three cups of coffee before she took off for school. When she walked into the classroom, there was a long, awkward silence. Yamanaka Ino pinched Karin hard and began hissing furiously into the other girl's ear. Everyone's eyes followed her as she walked to her seat and sat in the hard wooden chair. And as usual, Uzumaki Naruto was completely oblivious to the atmosphere of the room.

"Hey Sakura-chan! Are you feeling better now?" the blonde practically sang. Sakura didn't have the energy to ask him to stop talking. She nodded.

"Good! You know, me and Sasuke and Neji stopped by yesterday to check on you! But your cousin was there and he said that you had a fever! Come to think of it, you do look kind of pale," Naruto blabbered. Sakura nodded again, not really hearing what he was saying.

And unsurprisingly, Uchiha Sasuke and Hyuuga Neji stared at her the entire day. By the final period, Sakura wondered how they hadn't shot lasers from their eyeballs with all the strain they put on them.

"Hey! There's a really hot guy standing by the front gates!" Ino exclaimed as she looked out the window. All her friends immediately rushed over to see.

"Ooh! He looks cool!"

"I don't know. He looks kind of dangerous with that tattoo."

Sakura's ears perked up.

"I think that red hair looks hot."

Without talking to anybody, Sakura immediately grabbed her bag and slipped out of the classroom. Sasuke, who had been mildly interested in the strange visitor didn't notice her abrupt departure. And Neji was too busy wondering about Sakura to actually see her go. A minute later, Ino spoke again.

"Hey! That's Haruno! What's she doing talking to that guy?" demanded Ino.

Sasuke and Neji both whipped around to look at Sakura's empty desk. They exchanged angry looks with one another before they shoved some of the nosy girls away to get a clear look.

A story below, Sakura walked up to Sabaku no Gaara. He was wearing a clean white t-shirt over a pair of dark sweatpants and black sneakers. There was no school uniform in sight. His intense green eyes followed her from the moment she appeared in the glass door. The attention was a little flattering and a little irritating all at once.

"Hey," she greeted when she reached him. He nodded, taking a long drag of his cigarette. Sakura eyed the white stick for a minute and then motioned for him to hand it over.

"I hate people nagging me to quit," he muttered, giving it to her. To his surprise, Sakura put the cigarette in her own mouth, her expression faintly amused.

"Why are you here?" Sakura asked. Gaara's gaze travelled over her shoulder to the two mutinous faces watching them from the second floor.

"Uchiha and Hyuuga?"

Sakura nodded.

"I'm here to piss them off," he replied. In one smooth motion, he plucked the cigarette from her lips and pulled her in for a kiss.

There was an uproar heard through the glass windows.

Naruto (who had a not-so-secret crush on Sakura), Sasuke and Neji all looked absolutely thunderstruck. And although the girls shrieked in a wild frenzy, Ino and Karin were both secretly relieved that the pink-haired girl was no longer a rival for Uchiha Sasuke's attention.

From that day on, Sakura's "boyfriend" came to pick her up after school each day. He never wore his uniform, leading most of the girls to gossip about Sakura's boyfriend being in a gang. Sakura heard the rumors and laughed at the sheer irony. In fact, it was the complete opposite.

Because as of that excruciating dinner with Danzo, Haruno Sakura had become the heiress of one of the most powerful gangs in Japan. This meant that if Danzo died, Sakura would have unlimited money and power at her fingertips. And with Akatsuki as her personal agents, she would hold more influence than most leaders of countries.

Gaara, as Sakura found out, was not a delinquent.

"Hey," Sakura said one day as Gaara walked her home from school. It was growing colder so he had pulled on a gray jacket over his regular ensemble. He looked over at her as he lit a fresh cigarette. She sucked in a deep breath, loving the bitter, musky smell of tobacco lingering in the air.

"Don't you go to school?" she inquired.

"No. I run the dojo because my sister broke both her legs. I hate school anyway," he replied, shoving his hands into his pockets. Sakura was surprised. He was a completely different person from the vicious, confident warrior she had seen during underground fighting. She mentioned it to him too.

He snorted.

"You saw me? I guess when I fight… I become a different person," he explained, not meeting her eyes.

'That makes two of us,' Inner Sakura remarked with glee.

Sakura was satisfied with the arrangement because Sasuke and Neji stopped following her. It didn't stop them from watching her during school, but at least her private life was safe.

Most days after school, Sakura stopped by the Sabaku Dojo and trained. She beat up punching bags until they exploded in a flurry of white foam and sand. She sparred with opponents until they surrendered sporting bloody noses and fractured ribs. The only person who really posed any challenge to her was Gaara. They were matched relatively evenly. Sakura was faster but Gaara had more power. She was more flexible but he was more resilient. Eventually, their fights would become so intense and so serious that Gaara's older brother, Kankuro, would have to run out and restrain one of them and beg them not to cause any more property damage.

And Sasori continued to call to give her assignments.

There were a lot of jobs that involved locating people and threatening them until they pissed their pants and swore to do something. Every once in a while, she was sent to a lavish dinner with some local crime lord and she laughed, flirted and negotiated for a few hours while she inwardly decided whether or not to have him assassinated. A couple of times, Danzo-sama called for her again. Each time she would greet him with a smile and struggle to act normally in front of him. But as soon as she returned home, she would vomit violently, cry and not go to school for a few days.

And so time passed until it was December 23 and it was the end of the school term.

"It's nearly Christmas, Hime. Do you want anything?" Sasori asked as he drove her home from a late-night mission. Sakura slumped against the leather seat, listening to the latest victim thumping around in the back of the van. She stared out at the starless night, resisting the urge to cry.

And like every other year, she asked for the same thing.

"I want my brother, Sasori."

* * *

*Approximately $1,142,900

Reviews are very appreciated! Thanks!


	5. Likewise

Hey readers. I'm going away next week so I don't know if I'll be able to release Chapter 6 next Thursday. So I apologize in advance and I hope that the GaaSaku-ness in this chapter will be enough compensation. Hope you all enjoy this chapter.

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 5: Likewise

On Christmas day, Sakura sat in her apartment, staring out the window. She was sprawled on the floor, on her stomach, watching the snow fall. Sakura generally disliked her apartment. The wood floors were dull, the walls a bland shade of whitish-gray and the rickety washing machine always sounded like it was about to explode.

But the reason why she had originally rented the place was because of the living room. Like the rest of the apartment, it was small and plain. But the wall facing the street was one solid glass door that led to a nice if cramped balcony.

That day, she had left the door open, leaving the cold winter air to seep into the apartment. She wore black leggings and an oversized gray sweatshirt under a dark red afghan wrapped around her like a cocoon. A few snowflakes drifted inside, landing on her floor and melting away. The cup of hot chocolate she had brewed was already icy and forgotten.

"_It's nearly Christmas, Hime. Do you want anything?" _Sasori had said a few days earlier.

Sakura rolled onto her back and watched the snow fall from the dark gray sky. She took a deep breath of the crisp air, loving the way it almost hurt her throat.

"Shit," Sakura sighed. She groped around the floor until she found a carton of cigarettes. Her cold fingers stung as she fumbled around, trying to light it. Finally, the paper and tobacco smoldered, filling her mouth with the bitter flavor. It tasted familiar.

It tasted safe.

She relaxed a little as the nicotine flooded her system. Her fingers traced the lighter that hung from a chain around her neck.

"Shit," she said again. Closing her eyes, she took another deep breath and let her mind wander.

"_Sakura-chan, what do you want for Christmas, yeah?"_

_Sakura looked up from her mug of hot chocolate with a blank expression. She was sitting on her older brother's lap in some fancy café. He had bought her a thick slice of strawberry cheesecake and a few other cakes to take home with her in a pretty blue box._

"_Want? What Sakura wants?" she repeated, confused. She looked up into her brother's face, her nose scrunched up. _

"_Oni-chan will _buy_ you anything you want, yeah," he explained, stroking her hair. Sakura looked back down at her hot chocolate and poked at a few marshmallows. _

"_Sakura wants… Sakura wants Oni-chan to stay with her forever," Sakura finally said, her voice very quiet. The hand on her head suddenly grew very still. She turned her head to look at her brother, afraid that she had made him upset. Maybe she was being too selfish. She had only met her brother a year ago. Maybe he hated her now._

"…_Sakura-chan, I'll always be with you, yeah. You should ask for something else. How about a doll? Or a new dress?" he finally said. His blue eyes looked a little sad but Sakura didn't understand why. She watched as he pulled a cigarette from his pocket and used the silver rectangle that hung from a chain around his neck to light it. It was so pretty and it made a little clicking noise when the fire appeared. He released it, leaving it to settle back against his chest. Sakura reached out and she touched the shiny surface. _

"_Oni-chan."_

"_Hm?"_

"_Can I have this?" Sakura asked, pointing at the lighter. He took a deep breath from his cigarette and then blew out smoke like a dragon. She giggled a little. She loved the way it smelled because it was what her brother smelled like. He smiled down at her and smoothed her hair back. After a moment, he lifted the chain from his neck and then lowered it into Sakura's small hands. She smiled, her big emerald eyes lighting up._

"_Thank you, Oni-chan! I love you!" she exclaimed, throwing her arms around him. Pressed against his chest, she could feel the vibration as her brother laughed. She pulled away, still grinning._

"_No problem, yeah. You make it sound like this is the first time you've gotten a Christmas present."_

_Sakura suddenly sat very still._

"_Is that bad, Oni-chan?" Sakura whispered. _

"_Maybe… Sakura didn't get a present because she was bad. Maybe that's why Mommy left Sakura," she continued. Her eyes suddenly filled with tears. She heard her brother sigh loudly. _

"_No, Sakura-chan. You're a very good girl, yeah. Your mom was the bad one for not taking good care of you," he said, petting her head. It felt nice. His fingers were a little rough but gentle. _

"_Besides, Oni-chan will take care of you from now on. So don't cry, yeah." Sakura wiped at the tears in the corners of her eyes but they kept flowing. She felt dumb and she wished that she could forget her mommy. Because her mommy had been very nice and very pretty but she had cried a lot. And that scared Sakura. A year ago, her mommy had suddenly left Sakura with her father and gone off somewhere. Father never talked about her._

_But she felt safe and warm as her brother continued to stroke her hair and to tell her that she was a good girl. And the scent of French cigarettes and sweet coffee swirled around her as she rested her head against her brother's chest and listened to his heartbeat. The gentle rumble of his voice made her want to cry again. _

"_I love you, Oni-chan."_

Sakura held her cigarette between her fingers and gritted her teeth.

15 months later, he suddenly disappeared from her life.

"Damn liar," she muttered and then stuck the cigarette back in her mouth. The musky scent of Galuoises filled her head as she inhaled again. They were the same brand that her brother had used. She had even perfected the technique of blowing rings of smoke just like he had. Even then, it wasn't enough. Every day, she felt like she was slipping and losing another piece of her brother. It had been ten years and she clung to every memory of him that she could find.

She was lonely.

Her fingers tightened around the silver lighter. She hadn't even started smoking until she was fifteen. Even then, she had only done it so that she wouldn't forget what her brother had smelled like.

"Stupid Oni-chan," Sakura whispered as she opened her eyes and looked up at the sky again. She curled up on her side, facing the glass door and stared at the snow-covered streets.

"Merry Christmas," mumbled Sakura as she tossed her cigarette onto the snow-covered balcony. It sizzled against the ice. And Sakura lay staring at it until her phone rang nearly two hours later. She didn't move, though. She was tired of talking and she was tired of people. But when the answering machine kicked in, the person didn't even leave a message and simply hung up. This happened two more times before Sakura, irritated, finally picked up the phone.

"Hello?" she said. Her head spun as she suddenly sat up. She stared out the glass door, trying to steady her vision.

"…Haruno? It's Uchiha Sasuke."

"Oh. Hi," Sakura replied, unsure of what to say. Uchiha Sasuke and Hyuuga Neji had been relatively tolerable for the past few months. Of course, they still continued to stare at her during school and glare at any human male who happened to speak to her. But they had stopped following her around after school, at least. And of course, Sasuke (and a few times, Neji) had asked her out a dozen more times and Sakura had politely declined. So, Sakura shouldn't have been surprised at the next few words he said.

"Do you want to go see the Christmas tree with me?" he demanded. It would have been almost endearing if he hadn't sounded so arrogant.

Sakura stared at the snowy street below as if it could give her an answer. Didn't this guy get the hint? She had rejected him several times and she had even blatantly waved her "boyfriend" in front of his face. Why wouldn't he just leave her alone like almost everyone else in the school?

"Uh… Uchiha-san… Are you sure you have the right number? This is Haruno Sakura. Not Karin-san or Ino-san," she finally replied, holding back the insane urge to laugh.

"I know," the Uchiha replied in his infuriatingly calm voice. Sakura wanted to bash her head against a wall or something. Her fingers clenched the phone as she tried to reign in her temper.

"Uchiha-san, that's -" Sakura suddenly broke off as she caught sight of someone standing in the street below her balcony. He saw her through the opened door and he gave nonchalant wave.

"Gaara? What the- Hold on a second," she said as she stood and poked her head out the door. Sure enough, it was Gaara dressed in a black parka and a pair of faded jeans. There was a dark gray knit cap pulled over his red hair. He shoved his bare hands into his pockets, staring up at Sakura. She gave him an inquisitive look. But he just continued to stare up at her until she motioned for him to come upstairs. She listened to him crunching through the snow and then he ran up the stairs in the back that led up to her front door. He was polite enough to even knock on the door before Sakura let him in.

"What's wrong?" Sakura demanded as soon as he walked in, stomping his feet and shaking the snow off his shoulders. She suddenly remembered that she was still on the phone with Sasuke when Gaara pointed at her hand. It had been unplanned, but her unexpected guest had just solved her problem.

"Oh, sorry. My boyfriend just came over so I'm going to have to refuse. I'm sorry," she said, ignoring the smirk that Gaara gave her. He hung his park and hat on the coat hanger by the door and lined his boots up next to hers.

"…I see. Well… I guess I'll see you around," Sasuke replied and then hung up.

Sakura calmly set the phone back in its cradle and then turned around to face Gaara and then met his completely calm expression.

"You're a bitch," he simply said. And Sakura arched an eyebrow at him before as she passed him to go into the kitchen.

"Do you want coffee or tea?" she called. Gaara watched from the doorway as she filled a kettle with water and set it on the stove to boil. She brushed her bangs out of her eyes and then turned to face him.

"Tea. Why is your door open?" Gaara said while looking at her like she might be crazy. Sakura pulled a box out of a cabinet and fished out a tea bag. She placed it in a clean mug and crossed her arms over her chest, waiting for the water. After a few minutes, the kettle let out a shrill whistle and she turned off the burner. She poured the bubbling water into the mug and watched it turn a dark shade of amber. Before she could hand it over, Gaara grabbed the cup and took a sip, making a strange expression.

"What is it?" he asked, following Sakura into the chilly living room. She curled up on the floor just beside the sliding door and wrapped the burgundy afghan around her shoulders. Gaara sat beside her, taking another gulp of tea.

"It's Earl Grey. It's my favorite," Sakura finally responded. She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around herself. Gaara warmed his cold fingers on the hot mug, still wondering why any sane person would leave the door open on a snowing day. And suddenly, Sakura shifted and placed her head on Gaara's shoulder. He blinked a few times and then looked over at her but he didn't say anything.

He just sat quietly drinking his tea and watching the snow fall on the quiet corner of the city.

"Why are you here?" Sakura finally asked after a few minutes. She opened her eyes to stare up at the dark sky.

"My brother's off spending the day with his girlfriend, so my sister brought home some guy. I didn't feel like listening in on them all day," Gaara explained, his brows furrowing. He glanced over at Sakura and their eyes met.

"Are all your friends too busy to take you in?" she asked. Her tone wasn't teasing or rude. It was honestly curious and a little bit gloomy. But Gaara couldn't have known why.

"I don't have friends," replied Gaara, not looking sad at all. He seemed to have already come to terms with the fact. Sakura scoffed.

"That makes two of us."

Gaara finished the rest of his tea and set the mug down next to Sakura's long-forgotten cup of hot chocolate. His eyes took in the rest of the apartment. It was void of color and void of any photos or any personal objects. He found his gaze turning back to Sakura. She was watching him too.

"Why are you here? Really," she asked, her bright green eyes searching his face. Gaara heaved a sigh, jostling Sakura's head a little. He stared out at the snow-covered city for a minute, trying to gather the right words. Finally, he met her curious eyes with a half-smile.

"…Shit… Like I would know. I just ended up here," Gaara replied.

Sakura didn't say anything. She pulled the afghan a little tighter, trying to give her hands something to do. Because she felt like if she left them alone, her fingers would reach out and touch his face. Sakura clenched her hands around the edges of the blanket, willing them to stay still. If Gaara noticed, he didn't say anything. They sat in the cold together, not really doing anything until Gaara suddenly spoke again.

"Can I kiss you?" he suddenly asked. Sakura's eyes darted to his face.

He was completely serious.

Very slowly, she lifted her head from his shoulder to give him a withering stare.

"No," she firmly said, staring him straight in the eyes. He didn't look hurt or surprised. He simply nodded. Sakura reached over to grab a fresh cigarette from the crumpled box. When she straightened and lit the tip of the white stick, Gaara snatched the cigarette from her mouth and pressed a light kiss to her lips. She immediately smacked him away, feeling her face burn. Gaara had a bright red mark across his cheek. He leaned back on his hands and breathed a sigh.

"What the hell are you doing?" Sakura hissed. Her fierce glare didn't even ruffle him. Instead, he stuck the stolen cigarette into his mouth and sucked in a deep breath.

"What? It's not like it was your first kiss," Gaara said when he noticed Sakura still looking like she wanted to shoot lasers at him from her eye sockets. He blew a stream of smoke into the air, watching the white wisps curl around each other. Sakura stuck her hand out, looking ready to rip his head off.

"Cigarette. Now," she ground out between her teeth. Gaara stared her straight in the eyes and then he did something that probably put his life in peril. He smirked at her.

"Work for it, princess," he replied. He watched her eyes shift from light green to a blazing shade of emerald. The muscles in her body tensed like a lioness preparing to jump its prey. And Gaara calmly took another drag on the cigarette.

Sakura launched herself at him, half-snarling and half-laughing. She pinned him between her legs, groping for the cigarette that he dangled just out of her reach. It wasn't a real fight for the cigarette when there was a full box sitting on the floor. It was a battle for dominance and Sakura hated losing. Then again, so did Gaara. After a full five minutes of wrestling, Gaara blocked Sakura's flailing arms and stuck the cigarette in his mouth. Sakura shoved him down and snatched the white stick away. She smiled as she stuck it between her lips and took an exaggerated breath. Gaara lay on his back, staring up at her. He watched her take a few more puffs until he finally spoke.

"Happy?" he said. Sakura looked down at him from her rather awkward position. She was straddling him, leaving lots of room for innuendos. She sucked on her cigarette for a bit, thinking. When she finished, she tossed the smoldering butt onto the balcony, listening to it fizzle out against the snow. Sakura sighed a little and moved to climb off of him. But before she could, Gaara suddenly grabbed her arms and rolled over to reverse their positions.

Sakura let out a surprised huff but she didn't make any move to break free. Instead, she looked up at her unexpected captor and arched an eyebrow.

"Think of it as your Christmas present to me," Gaara explained as he leaned over and pressed his lips to hers. Sakura could have easily ripped away and broken his nose with her fist.

Maybe it was the cold. Maybe it was because she was feeling particularly vulnerable and lonely that day. For whatever reason, instead of pushing him away, Sakura tangled her fingers into his hair and pressed her body close to his. And for some reason, the feeling of a warm body close to hers and the familiar feeling of calloused hands made that Christmas seem not as horrible.

**

* * *

**

6:30 pm. Christmas day.

Haruno Sakura was lying on her back in the snow, listening to the eerie silence that only seemed to appear on snowy days. She listened to Gaara cursing and stomping around as he waited for his sister to answer his call. But after two tries, all her got was voicemail.

"She's probably busy entertaining her guest. Stay for dinner," Sakura said, practically feeling his frustration. Gaara left his sister a rather unpleasant voicemail that utilized a few choice four-letter words. When he was finished, he shoved his cell phone into his back pocket and turned around to see Sakura lying in the snow. Sakura met his gaze and stuck out her hand.

"Help me up, Casanova," she commanded with a smile. Gaara rolled his eyes but ended up pulling her to her feet anyway. Sakura brushed the snow off her leggings and the back of her white pea coat. They stood in the cold with identical poses: hands shoved into pockets and chins tucked into their chests. Finally, Sakura put her hands on her hips.

"I'm out of soy sauce. Let's go to the convenience store," Sakura ordered. Gaara muttered something under his breath but began trudging through the snow that just kept piling up on the streets. He was so immersed in his brooding that he didn't hear Sakura's footsteps crunching towards him a little too quickly. So he was completely unprepared when Sakura jumped onto his back. He automatically caught her legs and huffed a little when she put her arms around his neck.

"What the hell?" he snapped, half-considering dropped her. But Sakura snuggled against his back and let out a little sigh.

"Think of it as your Christmas present to me," Sakura said, spitting back his words from before. So, grudgingly, Gaara carried his fake girlfriend the four blocks to the convenience store. The entire way, Sakura was relatively quiet. She rested her head between his shoulder blades, feeling safe whenever she breathed in his distinctively male scent. A few yards away from the store, Gaara turned his head towards Sakura.

"Hey, look who it is," he whispered. Sakura, who had started to nod off, looked up. Just in front of them, Uchiha Sasuke and Yamanaka Ino walked in to the store, obviously just coming from watching the Christmas tree in the center of town together. Sakura snorted quietly. Obviously, Sasuke hadn't had any trouble finding another date.

"Put me down," Sakura quietly ordered. Gaara lowered her onto the ground, his eyes trained on Sakura's devious expression.

"You love torturing that kid, don't you," the red-head observed as they walked into the store together. Sakura grabbed his hand, smiling sweetly.

"It's just so much fun. What did I say I needed?" Sakura said, loud enough for the other couple to notice. She pretended not to see when Uchiha Sasuke gaped at her. Instead, she let Gaara put his arm around her shoulder.

"Soy sauce," he replied, smirking.

Sakura grabbed a bottle of soy sauce and handed it to Gaara before she dragged him to the cooler. As she mulled over the different brands, Gaara noticed Uchiha Sasuke and his blonde companion edging closer to them. They thought they were being subtle. Even Sakura, with her back turned, felt them blundering around.

"Ice cream? It's snowing," Gaara commented as he leaned in closer to Sakura. She smiled as she reached in the cooler and grabbed a quart of vanilla ice cream. Gaara slipped his hand around her waist and whispered against her ear.

"He's so pissed right now."

Sakura giggled, swatting at his arm. To anyone else (mainly Uchiha Sasuke) it looked like a boyfriend saying something dirty into his girlfriend's ear. The fake couple could practically feel Sasuke's irritation as he spied on them from behind a display of stacked toilet paper.

Gaara led Sakura to the cash register, his hand on her waist. He nuzzled against her neck and cheek as the rather uncomfortable cashier rang up the items and gave Sakura her change. Gaara was even chivalrous enough to carry the bag as they walked to the door. But Sakura suddenly stopped, tugging at his hand.

"Uchiha-san? Yamanaka-san? What are you doing here?" Sakura exclaimed, feigning surprise. The guilty duo slunk out from behind an aisle like children who had been caught with their hands in the cookie jar. Sasuke looked sulky while Ino looked positively thunderstruck.

"Hey… Haruno. Sasuke-kun and I were just at the Christmas tree. Is this your boyfriend?" Ino said. As she spoke, she eyed Sakura and Gaara's joined hands with envy. When she looked down at Sasuke's hand, he stuffed it into his pocket, obviously repulsed by the idea of holding hands with her. Ino pouted.

"Yeah. This is my boyfriend, Sabaku no Gaara. Gaara, these are my classmates, Yamanaka Ino and-" Sakura began, pretending not to notice the dirty looks the boys were giving each other.

"Uchiha Sasuke," Gaara interrupted, scowling at Sasuke. Ino was absolutely confused as she looked back and forth between the two enemies. She looked at Sakura, but Sakura shrugged, feigning ignorance. Finally, Sakura spoke up.

"Hey, it's snowing even more now. We better go. I'll see you guys around," she said, reaching up to pat Gaara's cheek. He glanced over at her and nodded. Shooting his hated rival one last glower, he pulled Sakura out of the convenience store. Well aware that the other couple was still watching, Gaara squatted down in the snow and jerked his head towards Sakura.

"Get on, crazy," he ordered. Sakura couldn't hold back her smile as she nestled up against his back. She hid her mischievous grin against Gaara's back as he began walking back to her apartment in the piling snow. A block away, Sakura snorted.

"And you call me the bitch," she commented, squeezing Gaara's shoulders with her hands.

"Because you are. But I'm an asshole so it's fine," Gaara replied. Sakura laughed. It wasn't condescending or cruel. It was light-hearted just like any other teenage girl's laugh should have sounded like.

"We make a pretty good team," Sakura concluded.

**

* * *

**

Sakura and Gaara spent New Year's Day at the Sand Siblings' dojo. They sparred, beat up equipment and hung out with his siblings. Temari and Kankuro positively adored Sakura. They spent most of the time heckling Gaara and begging Sakura to trade places with their younger brother, earning dirty looks from the red-head.

A week later, it was time for school to start again.

Sakura woke up a little before 7 am. She lay in her warm bed for a few minutes, just thinking. Following her usual morning tradition, she fumbled around until she found a box of cigarettes on her nightstand. Her older brother's lighter, as always, was hanging around her neck, ready to light. Smoking, she checked her cell phone and found a text message from Sasori that simply read 'Tonight. 5 pm. Weapon.' She slammed the phone back onto her night stand and cursed her life from the very depths of her soul. After a little while, she managed to calm down, she rolled out of bed, snubbed her cigarette out in the bathroom sink and had a long, hot shower.

Dry hair, brush teeth, face lotion.

Underwear, bra, white blouse, blue skirt, knee-high black socks, dark blue blazer, black boots.

A slice of toast, two cups of black coffee, grab bag, put on coat and leave the house.

It was the usual routine. Even if she hated her new school, it was the dull routine that helped her make it through the dismal days. But on the day, there was a kink in her usual schedule.

Sabaku no Gaara was leaning on the wall in front of her apartment. Sakura stared at him for a full minute, at a complete loss for words. Finally, she noticed his new school uniform and she punched him in the arm.

"You're transferring to my school?" she demanded, seeing the dark blue slacks and matching blazer peeking out from under his jacket. Gaara was in no mood to be cheerful so early in the morning. Instead, he ruffled his red hair and nodded.

"Why?"

"I was sort of expelled from my other school for breaking some kid's nose," Gaara said with an unapologetic shrug. Sakura rolled her eyes.

"And you also intend to wreck havoc at my school," Sakura added.

Gaara looked Sakura fully in the eyes and he grinned.

"Naturally."

* * *

Reviews are always greatly appreciated. Thanks to all my readers so far for their feedback. You guys are the greatest.


	6. Irresistable

I think there is definitely a correlation to what each chapter is like based on my mood. Right now, I'm dozing off at my computer so Sakura is absolutely insane.

Sorry for missing the update last week but I was away and now that I'm home, I've been writing like a crazy person. I really want to thank all of my readers, especially reviewers because you guys all make me feel really happy whenever I read all this amazing feedback and encouragement that you leave me.

Enjoy the next chapter!

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 6: Irresistible

Haruno Sakura walked in to school on Monday. She was holding hands with her boyfriend who was rumored to be a gangster. And he was wearing Konoha High's school uniform.

And the fodder for gossip spread like a wildfire in dead grass.

Students ran around whispering the news to their friends. And just as Sakura reached her locker, Uchiha Sasuke saw her. Sakura had been prepared to smile and tease him by flirting and giggling a bit with Gaara. But her heart clenched almost painfully in her chest when she noticed his expression.

Uchiha Sasuke looked like a kicked puppy. He stared at her with such a wounded expression that Sakura had to resist the strong urge to reach out and hug him. Something about his big, dark eyes in his pale face cried out, resonating deep within her.

Suddenly, Gaara's hands slammed down beside either side of her head, caging her in his strong arms. The sound of his palms smacking against the lockers drew stares. Sakura stared up at Gaara, half-annoyed and half-amused. Gaara leaned closer, throwing shadows across Sakura's small face.

"What are you doing?" she hissed. Gaara's aquamarine eyes focused on her pink lips. He didn't even make an effort to pretend that he was listening to her. Her mouth was small and almost always twisted in a frown or some disapproving expression. When she spoke, her even, white teeth flashed between her plump lips. She stopped talking and settled for glaring at him.

"Haruno," Sasuke said, taking a step closer. Sakura's eyes trailed to him, her expression apologetic. Gaara's glower intensified.

"Haruno," Gaara murmured and Sakura's face turned back to him. Her eyes widened as he crushed her mouth against his. It was nothing like Christmas day when he was slow and unhurried and almost gentle. His teeth scraped against her lips. His movements were so full of barely concealed violence that her knees buckled. Sakura whimpered when he dragged his tongue across hers. She forced her eyes open to take in his fierce, nearly bestial expression. And Gaara abruptly ripped his mouth away.

With a trembling hand, Sakura touched her kiss-swollen lips. Her wide eyes stared at Gaara, almost full of disbelief. Gaara's gaze was frozen on her face. He watched as a drop of blood welled up at the corner of her mouth. And he could have sworn that a single tear glittered on her cheek.

"Sabaku no Gaara? Please report to the main office," a teacher called, poking his head out of the office. He fixed the new student with a firm look before he retreated back in the room.

Sakura tore her eyes from Gaara, trying desperately to keep her composure. She felt Gaara sigh a little, blowing warm air against her cheek. He slowly lowered his arms, his eyes fixed on Sakura.

"Sorry," Gaara whispered.

Sakura looked up and she was startled by the intensity in his eyes and the sincerity in his voice. Very slowly, he leaned over and pressed a soft kiss against the corner of her bleeding mouth. He pulled back and licked his lips, tasting the metallic tang of her blood. Gaara touched her bottom lip with his thumb and then walked off to the main office.

As soon as he was gone, Sakura slid to the floor, feeling the cool metal lockers rub against the back of her jacket. She pressed her hand to her warm mouth and she laughed. Sakura was well aware of Sasuke staring at her and students that were walking into the school probably thought she was crazy. But just remembering Gaara's smoldering eyes made her chest expand with so many conflicting emotions that all she could do was laugh. She sat giggling uncontrollably until Sasuke finally took pity on her and offered a hand to help her stand.

"Are... you okay?" he asked, brow furrowed. Sakura managed to compose herself enough to stop the laughter. She raked her hands through her hair and then gave Sasuke a quick nod.

"Thanks," she said and then turned away to change her shoes and grab her books out of her locker. Without another word to Sasuke, she walked past him and headed to first period.

When she settled in her seat in the back, Ino and Karin walked up to her with short, almost angry strides.

"Haruno, let's talk," Ino said, sitting in Naruto's chair. Karin hovered over them, arms crossed over her chest. Sakura propped her chin up in her hand and waited with an expression of mild disinterest.

"Listen, I have liked Sasuke-kun since I was six and Karin has liked him since she moved here in middle school. He's never paid any attention to us! Ever! And suddenly, you move here and he can't stop looking at you!" Ino said with an utterly confused expression. Her pretty face was warped with jealousy as she spoke. Sakura didn't even blink. The blonde girl's lips pursed.

"Anyway, since you already have a boyfriend, I'd really appreciate it if you'd back off. I mean, I know Sasuke-kun is irresistible but you have to be fair," Ino said, flashing a beauty pageant smile. The classroom door slammed open and Uchiha Sasuke walked in, clearly having heard everything. He fixed Ino with a frosty glare as he shoved past Karin to sit at his desk next to Sakura.

"Morning, Sasuke-kun!" Ino chirruped, unfazed by his bad mood.

"Annoying," Sasuke muttered, looking away.

And Sakura, who hadn't spoken until then suddenly pushed back from the desk and stood. For some reason, she didn't seem as quiet and polite as usual. In fact, there was a definite sneer on her face. Unknown to everyone, as Ino's rant had gone on, Sakura had slowly lost her temper until Inner Sakura had finally taken the opportunity and broken loose. Somewhere in the back of her head, the real Sakura screamed in frustration. But on the outside, Inner Sakura's tough-girl aura demanded attention.

"Listen, Ino-Pig and 'Sasuke-kun'. It's lovely that you're all so frank about your feelings. Really. But it seems that all of you have terrible memories. Because you just mentioned that I'm taken so I really don't have any interest in this pretty boy over here. So take your stupid speeches and get the fuck out of my face," Sakura said, her voice coated in honey. Then, she gave a perfect impression of Ino's smile. Her little tirade was received with complete shock by the rest of the class. As the stunned silence stretched on, Kakashi walked in with the new transfer student. Sakura met Gaara's curious jade eyes and felt her cheeks grow a little warmer. Very slowly, she sat back in her seat, her eyes never leaving him.

"Ino, Karin, sit in your seats. Where's Naruto?" Kakashi said in an incredibly bored tone. When the class finally settled down and established that no one knew where Naruto was, Kakashi wrote "Sabaku no Gaara" on the chalkboard.

"This is Gaara and he's a new student. Why don't you introduce yourself to the class?" Kakashi said, directing the question to the teenager standing next to him.

Gaara's eyes bored into Sakura as he spoke.

"No."

Kakashi blinked once. He looked over at the new student once more and then shook his head, giving a weary sigh.

"Alright then. I've actually been meaning to change the seating arrangements. So," Kakashi announced as he pulled down a map in the front of the room, revealing a diagram of the entire classroom taped onto it. Each desk had a last name written on it, "Everyone change your seats and we'll get you settled in, Gaara."

There was a mad dash as everyone scrutinized the drawing and tried to figure out if they were near friends. In the midst of the chaos, Sakura quietly picked up her things and moved to her new spot. It was in the second to last row from the back, right next to the big windows. Ino and Karin were in the front row by the door, wedged in a group of their friends. And as the students settled into their new spots, there was one empty desk next to Sakura and one by Sasuke who sat right behind her.

Kakashi considered each seat carefully. When he turned back to Gaara, he saw his student exchanging absolute death glares with Sasuke. Very slowly, he turned his attention to Sakura who looked extremely amused and not willing to murder the new student. She pressed her lips together and met Gaara's fierce eyes.

Her smile widened.

And with a snort, Sabaku no Gaara relaxed and shoved his hands in his pockets. Kakashi heaved a sigh.

"Alright, Gaara, sit next to Sakura. You can share books with her for today," Kakashi instructed. And as Gaara walked up the aisle towards Sakura, she felt her inner persona break out in a cruel smile.

**

* * *

**

Haruno Sakura did not consider herself a sadist. She did, however, find extreme amusement in annoying Uchiha Sasuke. And of course, Neji was sitting two rows away so he had a clear view of Sakura and Gaara flirting the entire day.

Gaara's hands would touch Sakura's when they both went to flip a page. Their eyes would meet every once in a while and Sakura would smile. They had pushed their desks together so that they could share one book. Gaara's foot would rest lightly atop Sakura's, occasionally pushing her leg. They wrote silly notes to each other in their notebooks and secretly laughed over them. And then, whenever a teacher would leave the room, he would lean over and whisper something into her ear that would make her laugh. And the waves of hostility and anger from Sasuke and Neji would strike fear into everyone's hearts.

"Hey," Gaara suddenly said in between classes. And even though he had been speaking to Sakura, the entire class listened in.

"What are you doing after school?" he asked. Sakura cupped her chin in her hand with a demure smile.

"I have work. What about tomorrow?" Sakura replied, tilting her head to the side. She reached out and moved a lock of Gaara's hair out of his face. His hair was pulled back in a short ponytail but his bangs were still unmanageable.

"I'll take you to get your hair cut tomorrow," Sakura suddenly said. When she moved to take her hand away, Gaara turned his head to lightly kiss her fingertips. A few girls in the class gasped.

"Whatever you say, princess," he said with a mischievous grin. Sakura tried her best not to blush as she casually leaned back in her seat. The teacher walked in and then history class started. An hour later, the lunch bell rang.

Without warning, Sakura grabbed her bag with one hand and Gaara with the other and practically flew out the door. The entire classroom burst into furious whispering as soon as the couple was gone. The angry hiss followed them as they walked down the hall and down the stairs until they were outside the school building. Sakura let out a deep breath that sent her bangs fluttering against her forehead.

"Lovely classmates you have," Gaara commented as he fished a cigarette out of his pocket. He looked over at Sakura who merely huffed at him. She pulled on the long silver chair hidden under her uniform and revealed her cigarette lighter, still warm from her skin. The bright flame flickered to life, dancing around the tip of the cigarette until a musky smell filled the air. Sakura dropped the lighter back under her shirt with a half-smile.

"I know. They're absolute jewels," Sakura replied, watching Gaara suck in a deep breath. He caught her watching and offered the cigarette out to her. She gratefully accepted it and stuck it in her mouth. The bitter taste of tobacco spread along her tongue, clogging her throat and nostrils.

"Fuck your life," Gaara sighed, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"Fuck yours too, then. You're stuck here with me," she remarked. Gaara smirked as he put an arm around her.

"We're fucked then," he said. And they both stared up at the gray sky and watched as snow began to flutter to the ground.

* * *

After school, Sakura walked home alone. She jammed her hands into her pockets and snuggled up into her red scarf but the icy winter air seemed determined to freeze her alive. Gaara had offered to walk her home, but for some reason, she had refused and smiled, sending him off. Sakura half-ran the rest of the way to her apartment. Her fingers shook from the cold as she jammed her key in the lock and hurried in to the small but warm flat.

When she flicked on the light switch by the door, she nearly screamed.

"Kisame!" she exclaimed, stomping her feet with frustration. The blue-haired man lounging on her sofa grinned. Sakura resisted the strong urge to throw her school bag at him. Instead, she unwound her scarf and took off her gloves and left them in a neat pile by her shoes. Then she hung her jacket on the coat rack by the door and pried her boots off. Kisame sat content to watch until Sakura walked over and plopped down on the sofa next to him.

"Why are you here?" Sakura asked in a much softer voice. She leaned against his arm, instinctively seeking his warmth. Kisame had always been like a big, rather rude teddy bear. And despite his gentleness around her, the tattoos on his arms ensured that she would never forget that this man was also a criminal.

"We need you to do a hit, Hime," Kisame replied, his voice unnaturally quiet. Sakura pursed her lips, trying her best to quell the growing urge to scream at him.

"Who?" she finally managed to ask. Her hands trembled, but not from the cold. Kisame sighed.

"Some old guy. He's got his grimy hands in some of our business and Danzo-sama wants him out," Kisame explained. Unsurprisingly, Sakura looked absolutely miserable as she listened to the news. She stared down at her socks for a few minutes, completely silent. Something flickered across her face as she thought. Then, she suddenly sat up straight with a completely blank expression.

"Sasori said that he would send Yakushi over around 8. I've got to go, Hime," Kisame grunted as he stood. He turned around to look at Sakura for a moment. Her lucid green eyes stared up at him. For a moment, he was almost reminded of Haruno Danzo with his cold eyes that saw everything. A shiver ran up his spine that he was almost certain that Sakura noticed.

"Bye, Kisame," she quietly said. Her eyes drifted to the big glass doors in the living room. She watched the snow falling onto her balcony with a stillness that almost frightened her guest. So Kisame bowed his head and silently left the apartment.

Sakura waited for his footsteps to fade and for his car to start up and drive off. And then, she curled up into a small ball, wrapped her arms around herself and sobbed until her throat ached. Tears spilled from her eyes until her cheeks stung. And the pain in her chest felt like a knife that stabbed with each heavy throb of her heart. Still hiccupping, she reached into her shirt, grabbed the lighter and pressed the warm metal to her cheek. And if she focused hard enough, she could remember the feel of her brother's big hands as he carried her to his car and smooth her hair back. He would smell like tobacco and expensive cologne and coffee as he held her and promised to protect her.

The tears started again.

And that was the way that Uchiha Itachi found her. He had lent Kisame the spare key and when it had been returned, Itachi had probably received word of Sakura's reaction.

The door swung open with a gust of frigid air. Itachi walked in, his dark eyes immediately focusing on Sakura curled up on the sofa. She was still wearing her school uniform, complete with the knee-high black socks she hated. She didn't even look up at him as he took off his shoes and jacket and approached her.

"Sakura."

"Go away," she whispered, her voice rough from crying.

"Sakura, look at me."

"Get out," Sakura said. She clenched her hands, ashamed to look like such a mess in front of him. Itachi's cool hands took her shoulders.

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" she shrieked, flinching away from him. She buried her face in her hands. Her entire body shook and it was impossible to tell whether she was crying or not.

"Sakura, you're being unreasonable," Itachi stated. His dark brown eyes were softened a little as he stared down at her. Finally, with a faint sigh, Itachi sat down beside her.

"You've done this before. You know we've all done it before," he continued. The 'we' referred to the members of the Akatsuki. Sakura knew that she had grown up surrounded by murderers, arsonists and loan sharks. In some ways, it had made her wiser and stronger. But in other ways, it had made her desperately fragile. Her heart just couldn't take it.

Sakura continued to look away from him.

"I'm dirty… I don't want to do this anymore. I want to disappear," Sakura croaked, pressing her face against the arm of the sofa.

"Sakura-"

"I told you to **leave**. **Why aren't you going away?**" Sakura shouted. Tears rolled down her cheeks, dripping onto her lap. And Itachi, despite his seemingly unending supply of patience for Sakura, finally lost control.

"Look at me!" Itachi demanded, grabbing Sakura and spinning her around. Her eyes widened for a split second as she hung limply in his grasp.

Then, she threw countless insults on him. She pushed and punched at his chest and arms. But there was no malice in her words while her hands didn't have the strength to actually hurt him. Itachi kept a firm grip on Sakura while she struggled. And then, she suddenly drooped.

"Fuck you," she whispered, finally looking him full in the face. Her bright emerald eyes burned holes deep into his soul. They were so full of disgust and hatred that it almost made him feel sick. His fingers tightened on her upper arms, digging into her soft flesh.

"I hate you," Sakura said, her eyes brimming with tears again. And Itachi slowly loosened his grip.

"No you don't," Itachi simply said, finally reigning in his temper. Sakura's small mouth curled up into a smile that didn't quite reach her eyes. She grabbed a handful of Itachi's shirt while trying to hold back another big sob. And then, she took a big breath and Sakura began to laugh. She buried her face in his chest and giggled a little until she began crying again.

"Sakura," Itachi whispered after about an hour of indulging her wild mood swings. Very reluctantly, Sakura looked up at the man. Her eyes were bloodshot and puffy but completely trusting.

"You're going to do this. But I'll stay with you tonight and tomorrow," he carefully explained. Sakura sniffed a little and rubbed at her eyes with her shirt sleeves.

"Can you make it just through the next few hours?" Itachi demanded. Very slowly, Sakura nodded. She released his shirt and disentangled herself from his arms.

"Good. Go get ready," he said, leaning forward and pressing a light kiss to her cheek. And Sakura stood, brushed nonexistent lint off her skirt and walked into her bedroom like nothing had happened.

There wasn't much to do that night other than eat, shower and dress. Itachi sat on her bed and watched as she pulled her long hair into a ponytail and dressed in a black top, tight black pants and heavy black boots that came up to her knees. And for once, Inner Sakura was completely silent as Sakura crawled onto her bed and laid her head in Itachi's lap. She closed her eyes and listened to the silence in her apartment. Her chest was constricted with too many bitter emotions to really sleep. Instead, she relished the feeling of being protected and spoiled and fought to keep the tears at bay.

At exactly 8 pm, Yakushi Kabuto pulled up in front of the apartment and escorted Sakura to the location of her job. He opened the trunk of the car to reveal several different guns and weapons all neatly packed away in silver cases. Sakura chose her usual sniper rifle along with her katana that she always kept strapped to her back. As she loaded the ammunition, Kabuto bowed low and got back into the car.

Inner Sakura took control as she climbed up a building using the fire escape. She swung up onto the flat roof and stared out at a nearby street just as her earpiece crackled.

"Target will pass in approximately four minutes," a familiar voice announced.

"Shut up, Ukon," she snapped as she set up her rifle on the ledge of the roof. She peered down at her target and then carefully positioned her hands on the heavy gun. The cold metal burned her bare hands as she waited and waited. Finally, the black limo pulled onto the street.

Sakura's shoulders tensed as she waited for the fancy car to drive past. She absolutely hated that her finger pulled the trigger at the exact right time. The single bullet whistled through the air, piercing the darkened windows. The limo swerved and then quickly stopped on the side of the road. Three women stumbled out of the car, screaming and spattered with red brain tissue.

And Sakura lifted the gun onto her shoulder and sighed.

"I'm done, Ukon. I'm going home," she said. She tried desperately to ignore the hollow throb in her chest as she heard the ambulance speeding to the already dead man. And this time, it was Inner Sakura who, from the back of their minds, buried her face in her hands and sighed.


	7. Apathy

Uh, oops. I'm technically 8 minutes late. Oh well, let's just be lenient and say that this was posted on a Thursday! As always, I want to thank all my loyal readers and reviewers for all their support and input. Hope everyone enjoys this new chapter!

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 7: Apathy

"Sakura! Sakura, wake up!"

Sakura slowly turned her head in the general direction of the voice. She forced her eyes to focus and found a little Ino standing in front of her with an annoyed expression. The blonde girl put her on hands on her hips, frowning.

"Sakura, you better hurry up or Iruka-sensei's going to get mad!" Ino said.

Sakura blinked again and suddenly Ino was about nine years older.

"Did you hear me, Haruno? We have to go to chemistry!" Ino nagged, tapping her foot against the floor. Sakura's body felt oddly sluggish as she grabbed her bag and slung it over her shoulder. Ino's stern expression dropped and then she checked to make sure that none of her friends were in the room.

"Hey… are you ok?" Ino inquired, carefully looking at Sakura's pallid face.

"I'm fine," Sakura snapped as she stood. The room spun and she had to slap her hands down on her desk to stay standing. Her knees felt like overcooked noodles. On impulse, Ino reached out to steady her. Sakura pushed her hands away, grimacing.

It was the end of January and Sakura was beginning to feel tired and achy all over. She drank plenty of water and took vitamin supplements but she was ravaged by migraines and nausea that forced her to stay out of school some days. And for some odd reason, even after Sakura had given an angry little speech on the first day back from winter break, Yamanaka Ino was clinging to her like lint on a sock in the dryer.

"Hey Haruno, can I ask you something?" Ino asked as she followed Sakura's brisk steps down the hall. Sakura made a vague noise in the back of her throat, not looking over at her companion.

"You know at the beginning of the term… you got really mad and you called me 'Ino-Pig'?" Ino began in an unsure voice. Sakura froze in her tracks.

"I had a best friend in kindergarten and elementary school. But she moved away when we were little… and she used to call me that. In fact… she looked a lot like you… and I was wondering if that was you," the blonde admitted in an unusually quiet voice. Sakura's hands balled into fists as she stared down at the white-tiled floor. Very slowly, she lifted to her head to stare Ino straight in the eyes.

"I don't know, Ino-san. Do you still want to open your own flower shop?" Sakura replied and with a cold smile, she stepped into the chemistry lab. And Ino stood in the hallway, absolutely dumbfounded until the teacher yelled at her and pulled her into the classroom.

**

* * *

**

After school, Sakura lay on her back on a cold wood floor. She stared up at the ceiling, watching the lights and tiles blend into swirling patterns until her stomach heaved. She abruptly sat up just as Gaara, fresh out of the shower, walked over and plopped down beside her. His shaggy red hair was soaking wet, splattering water across the shiny floor.

"You'll catch a cold," Sakura said as she flopped back on her back. She relished the feel of the smooth wood against her aching muscles.

"Thank you, mother," Gaara retorted, even as he obediently rubbed his hair dry with the towel draped around his neck. Sakura pretended not to notice but she smiled. She rubbed at her tender neck and back, trying to release some of the tension in her muscles. Gaara tossed his towel aside motioned for Sakura to come closer.

"Let me," he ordered, leaving Sakura little choice but to obediently sit between his legs. Immediately, his long fingers pressed into her muscle and Sakura let out a little sigh. His strong hands patiently kneaded all of her sore spots, relaxing the knots and easing the pain away. His fingers paused once when they reached her shoulders.

"Hold on," Sakura said, leaning over to grab her cell phone. Her white tank top rode up, exposing her back.

"Sakura."

"Yeah?" she replied, sitting back up. She found Gaara's eyes fixated on her back and she scowled.

"What are you looking at, pervert?" she demanded, shoving him in the chest. But Gaara grabbed her with one hand and yanked up her shirt with the other. There was a faint mark on her lower back, just above the waistband of her sweatpants. But when he looked closer, it was a deep, jagged scar about the size of his palm. He spun Sakura around, ignoring her protest and found a matching shape on her stomach. Gaara carefully pressed his hand to the scar, his eyes wide with disbelief.

"Don't…" Sakura quietly protested, trying to wriggle away. Gaara's eyes snapped up to her weary expression.

"Who… are you, exactly?" he finally inquired. His eyes flickered down to her stomach and back up to her face. And Sakura responded by looking straight into his eyes and giving him the most mischievous smirk she could muster.

"No one, really," she replied. They watched each other, Gaara with suspicion and Sakura with amusement. Finally, Gaara grabbed her by the shoulders and smashed his lips into hers. His tongue scraped across the roof of her mouth with unmistakable violence.

He was angry.

Sakura responded by smacking her forehead into his. Gaara abruptly drew back, blinking and rubbing at his sore head.

"What the hell!" Sakura snapped as she got to her feet. She rubbed the back of her hand across her swollen lips with a disgusted expression. She hurriedly pulled on her coat and stomped over to the door to jam her feet into her boots. Gaara sat sprawled on the floor, watching her with a dazed expression. Halfway through opening the door, she paused and looked back at him. Her bright green eyes narrowed as she surveyed him for a moment.

"What's wrong with you?" she demanded in a harsh whisper.

And Gaara flopped onto his back with a sneer.

"Like I would know," the red-head retorted. He didn't even flinch when the door slammed shut, shaking the dojo walls.

Sakura half-ran to her motorcycle, willing her knees not to shake. She threw her leg over the cold bike and jammed the key into the ignition. Even the usual calm she felt while riding her favorite motorcycle didn't kick in. Instead, as she pulled on her helmet, she couldn't forget the feel of Gaara's lips roughly conquering hers. She let out a short scream of frustration as she sped down the street. The icy wind stung at her exposed fingers and neck as she veered onto the highway, receiving a chorus of angry car horns.

Sakura ground her teeth as she weaved between the slower cars and pulled onto her exit. The world whipped by in a blur of snow and frozen black pavement. Her cold-numbed fingers tightened on the motorcycle when she saw a suspiciously fancy car parked outside of her apartment building.

"Hime!" someone shouted over the roar of the motorcycle as Sakura pulled into the parking lot behind the building. She slammed on the brakes just in time to avoid hitting the man who had jumped in front of her bike.

"God! What are you doing, Idate?" she shouted as she pulled off her helmet and flung it at him. To her surprise, Idate wasn't even slightly apologetic. Instead, he grabbed her arm, desperation shining in his dark eyes.

"Hime, you need to come with me now. There's trouble," Idate said, the usual mirth in his voice gone. Sakura stared him in the eyes for a few tense seconds. Then, she gave him a jerky nod and snatched her helmet back. She shoved it under the seat of her bike and locked it in place with a thin metal cable.

"Where are we going?" Sakura inquired as she grabbed her keys out of the ignition and shoved them in her back pocket. But when Idate looked back at her with frightened eyes, she decided to drop the question. It was strange to see Idate so worried. Then again, it was rare for Morino Idate to be out and about in broad daylight. Usually he and his older brother, Ibiki, were running the warehouse by the docks for interrogations. Sakura could count the number of times she had seen Idate out of the warehouse on her hands.

As she had suspected, the car had been Idate's. Sakura climbed into the passenger's seat, noting the fuzzy dice hanging from the rearview mirror. There was a crumpled hamburger wrapped as well as a half-eaten carton of french-fries wedged into the cup holders. She had scarcely closed the door when Idate sped off, spraying dirty snow onto the sidewalk.

A few minutes into the completely silent car ride, Sakura's phone rang.

"Hime, don't answer that," Idate immediately said, not taking his eyes from the road. He seemed especially busy with checking all the mirrors, as if someone might be following the car.

"It's Kabuto," Sakura observed, checking the caller ID.

"**Really** don't answer it. He's been working for Orochimaru from the beginning," Idate spat. His face contorted with hatred and his knuckles turned white as they clutched the steering wheel. Sakura felt her phone crackle as her fingers tightened around it.

"…that… fucking traitor," Sakura hissed. She glared out the windshield, looking ready to positively murder someone. Her hands clenched in her lap, occasionally twisting into the fabric of her pants. Idate sighed.

"Listen, Hime, I don't know if you're bugged right now. So I'm going to be quick. I'm going to take you somewhere safe. We've already had your sick leave arranged for school. No matter what happens, don't answer your phone," he instructed in quick, choppy sentences. Sakura nodded as the car pulled onto a familiar street and stopped in front of an unexpected building. Idate jerked his head, signaling for Sakura to get out of the car. She touched his shoulder before stepping onto the street and closing the door. Idate immediately drove off, probably to go meet up with his brother.

Sakura tightened her hands into fists as she strode down the sidewalk and squeezed into a side alley. She approached the big steel door and knocked on it three times. After a moment, a rectangle of metal slid back and suspicious eyes stared down at her.

"Hime," a coarse voice gasped and the rectangle closed. The door clanked and groaned as it swung open, revealing Zetsu in black slacks and a white dress shirt. He bowed low as Sakura stepped into the building. The heavy door automatically swung shut behind her, locking and beeping as the complex security system reset itself. Zetsu revealed a slim black wand in his hand.

"A metal detector?" Sakura demanded, arching an eyebrow. Zetsu bowed again and then began waving it near Sakura, checking her arms and legs and even the inside of her jacket to be sure. After a few minutes, he declared her clear and shoved the metal detector into the hands of one of the security guards near the door.

"This way, Hime," Zetsu said, taking Sakura by the elbow. They hurried up the three flights of bleak, gray stairs and then Zetsu channeled chakra into his fingers and swiped the edge of the door. When the door groaned and slid open, Uchiha Itachi was standing on the other side. He quickly looked over Sakura.

"What's going on?" Sakura demanded as she was handed over to Itachi. She hated being passed around like some sort of helpless child. She quickly shut her mouth when Itachi led her through the door into the communal kitchen. Konan was sitting at the counter, quietly folding paper animals and speaking to Pein. Sasori was standing by the fireplace, tapping his toes and staring at the floor. Hidan and his rarely-present partner, Kakuzu sat on the sofa, for once, not arguing. When Sakura and Itachi entered, everyone stood at once.

"Ah, Hime is here. We should hurry," Pein announced. His voice was so full of authority and calm that it was impossible to disagree with them. Pein's movements were so majestic that Sakura almost didn't notice him walk up to the refrigerator and press a few buttons on the ice dispenser. The refrigerator clanked and then a grating, metallic sound filled the kitchen. After a minute, Pein opened the cabinet beside the refrigerator that was normally filled with dried pasta and rice. Instead, there was a flight of spiraling glass stairs that led up to the secret room that Sakura had always been kept from. Pein and Konan went up first, followed by the rest of the members of the Akatsuki.

"Sakura," Itachi said as he grabbed her arm. They were the only two that hadn't gone upstairs. Sakura's head turned and she watched him with a wary expression.

"You're ill," he realized. His brow furrowed as he took in Sakura's pasty complexion and the dark smudges under her emerald eyes. She half-smiled and took his hand.

"Let's go, Ni-san," Sakura whispered as she pulled him up the narrow stairs. At the very top of the stairs, Sakura exhaled through her teeth, trying to hide her surprise. She had always wondered what sort of place the secret meeting room had been ever since she was young.

The black tile floors gleamed reflected light off the matching black walls. In the very back of the room stood a giant glass display case filled with various weapons and artifacts. There was a long, narrow conference table in the center of the room. To Sakura's surprise, it wasn't Pein who was sitting at the head. Instead, he was sitting to the left of the empty chair. Itachi's fingers just barely squeezed hers.

"Go," he murmured in her ear when she hesitated. Her footsteps echoed ominously against the floor as she made her way to the table.

"Please, sit, Hime," Pein instructed, sounding as courteous as ever. Sakura slowly sat in the indicated chair, not liking the way that everyone's eyes were glued to her. Itachi sat directly to her right and he glowered at Pein. There was a long pause in the room until the normally silent Konan spoke up.

"Hime, we have news," the woman gently said. Sakura stared at her. For some reason, everyone's attitudes were making her heart clench in her chest.

"Danzo-sama… is dead," Konan announced. Her heavy declaration seemed to bounce off the walls and spin around the otherwise silent room. Sakura's eyes widened but she couldn't articulate any words to say in response.

"We have a copy of Danzo-sama's will and it appears that he has left not only his position, but all his assets to you. We're having Kakuzu working on your case already," Pein explained.

"Kakuzu?" Sakura repeated unsurely. She turned her head to look at Itachi instead who merely nodded his head.

"Yes, Hime. As you know, Danzo-sama had several lovers and several other children. There is no doubt that there will be those that contest your right to his estate. We are merely preparing for the battle in advance," Itachi explained with another nod. Something clicked in Sakura's head. She leaned back in her chair and crossed one leg over the other.

"So… I guess that means that… I-"

"Correct, Hime. You are now the leader of Root as well as Akatsuki. What are your first commands?" Pein cut in. His dark grey eyes shimmered with some sort of strong emotion. He leaned forward in his seat, ready to devour her next words.

And Sakura looked up at the glossy ceiling and sighed. She laced her fingers together as she mulled over different ideas and mentally made a list of things that needed to be done. Finally, she looked up at her companions who were all much older than her. Despite the age gap, she could sense their undying loyalty and their eagerness to hear her commands. And Inner Sakura spread her tendrils of conscience through their shared mind, taking full control. Outer Sakura gladly retreated into the farthest corner of her head and tried to absorb that was going on all at once.

"Where's Yakushi Kabuto?" she finally demanded, much to the surprise of everyone at the table. All eyes automatically turned to Zetsu.

"Kisame had him and his accomplices escorted to the docks. He is currently investigating the situation with Morino Ibiki," Zetsu reported. The eyes focused back on Sakura who nodded and seemed to silently debate something.

"Good. Then I need you to call an assembly of everyone involved in this organization in three day's time. I think it's time that we reassess the authority and root out any more possible weeds," Sakura said, finishing with a snarl. Her lip curled as she remembered Kabuto's fake loyalty and his supposed devotion to Danzo's objective.

"I assume that there will be people looking to take my life so I will stay here for a few days until this settles down," Sakura continued, naturally slipping into the role. Pein took in each sentence with a look of absolute awe.

"But tonight, I believe I have some business at the docks. So, if you will excuse me," Sakura said, standing. Everyone immediately stood along with her and bowed so low that their foreheads nearly touched the top of the table. And no one but Itachi saw her lip curl with utter disgust.

An hour later, Sakura walked into the drafty warehouse among a cacophony of whispers and pointing fingers. Even though she hadn't asked, Itachi was attached to her side like an overprotective shadow. He guided her through the complex maze of stairs and guarded doors until they finally reached a room at the very end of a narrow hallway. When they approached, Kisame heard the footsteps and poked his head out of the room.

"Ah, Hime. Welcome," the blue man said with a toothy grin. Sakura nodded her head at him and walked straight past, into the darkened room.

"Hi, Kabuto-kun," she greeted in her sweetest tone. Just the sound of her honeyed voice made the hairs rise on the back of everyone's necks. Sakura pulled up a metal chair in front of the capive and smiled. Her eyes took in Kabuto's bound hands and feet with relish. She eyes the dark purple splotch blooming across Kabuto's face with satisfaction.

"How are you feeling?" Sakura asked like she was at a tea party and not walking in an on a rather brutal interrogation.

"Forgive me, Hime," Kabuto wheezed. Sakura stood, shoving her chair back so quickly that it clattered to the ground. Before she could reign in her temper, her foot lashed out and smashed into Kabuto's chair. The silver-haired man, bound to the back of the chair couldn't even break his fall as the chair tipped over. The side of his head smacked against the cold concrete, making him groan.

"Oh, my mistake. Let me help you," she said with a feral grin. Her foot smashed down on Kabuto's ribs. He keened like a wounded animal as Sakura dug the heel of her boot into his side.

"Did you kill my father or did one of your cronies do it?" Sakura demanded, pressing more of her weight into her foot. Kabuto gasped, trying to hold back tears.

"Answer me, you lying son of a bitch," she hissed, jabbing at his side with extra force. Kabuto squealed.

"It was me, Hime! Please forgive me!" he blurted out with an agonized sob. Tears began streaming down his face and his chest heaved. Disgusted, Sakura kicked him away. She watched as Ibiki roughly set Kabuto's chair back up and demanded that the silver-haired man stop blubbering like a child.

"What should we do with him, Hime?" Ibiki asked, his eyes never leaving his prisoner. Sakura stared down at her nails for a moment. When she looked up, a cruel smile stretched her mouth.

"Give Orochimaru his head on a stick for all I care. Just get the message across," she snarled. With a curt nod of her head, she spun on her heel and stalked out of the interrogation room. Itachi quickly followed after her. Their brisk footsteps echoed in the otherwise quiet warehouse until Itachi finally caught up to Sakura. He grabbed her arm.

"Sakura."

"Let me go, Itachi," she demanded in a low, even voice. She refused to look him in the eyes.

"What are you doing, Sakura?" Itachi asked.

"…Like I would know," Sakura replied, using the exact same words that Gaara had said to her earlier in the day. And Itachi grabbed her chin, forced her to look him in the eyes and spoke.

"Don't do this. You're going to regret it later," he warned.

Sakura smirked.

"What? Being alive? I regret that every day," she retorted. She easily slid from his grasp and continued down the dank hallway. And Itachi's dark eyes burned into her back, following the thin shoulders that always seemed to be carrying far too much weight.

* * *

"Oi, where's Sakura-chan?" Uzumaki Naruto demanded.

Gaara looked up from his work to give the blonde a death glare. But for some reason, this didn't seem to faze Naruto at all. The stupid blonde just continued to stand there, waiting for an explanation.

"I don't know," Gaara finally spat like the very words tasted disgusting. Naruto made an angry noise in the back of his throat and stomped away, back to his friends. Out of the Konoha team, Gaara had always found Naruto the most tolerable. But still, after nearly two weeks of no contact from Sakura and Gaara's patience was threadbare at best.

"How do you not know? She's your girlfriend," Sasuke demanded from his seat nearby. Gaara didn't even dignify him with an answer. He was well-aware of the Uchiha's intense, burning hatred from him. And his collaboration in Sakura's journey to piss him off had not helped him gain much love in Uchiha-land. Usually, this wouldn't have bothered him, but with the tournament drawing closer and his teammate virtually unreachable, everything was grating on Gaara's nerves.

"Shut it, Uchiha," Gaara growled through his teeth.

And today was the day of the final so if Sakura didn't show up, she would essentially have to repeat the entire year. Gaara's eyes flickered to the door every few minutes until Kakashi, late as usual, sauntered into the room.

"Who are we missing? Sakura? Is that it?" he asked, looking around the room. Kakashi tried to ignore the malicious auras emanating from the general back area of the room. When he was met with silence, he turned around to get the tests from his desk to hand out to the students. The door slid open and Haruno Sakura quietly walked into the room.

"Sorry I'm late, sensei," she apologized in a quiet tone. Twenty pairs of eyes immediately snapped into her and the volume of gossip in the room swelled.

"Ah, Sakura, you're just on time. Have a seat," Kakashi said with his usual smile. Sakura bowed once and then quickly headed to her desk, ignoring the outraged looks from her classmates. Her eyes briefly met Gaara's but she didn't even acknowledge his presence.

"Alright, class, I'll start by handing out the answer sheet for the test. Write your name and the date in the spaces provided," Kakashi instructed as he began passing out the white sheets to the students.

Gaara nearly snapped his pencil in half when Sakura looked up at him and smiled. But it wasn't the normal smile that she usually gave him. It wasn't the smile of a partner-in-crime. Instead, she looked like she knew something that he didn't and was dying to rub it in his face.

"Sakura, are you sure you'll be okay after missing all that review?" Kakashi asked as he handed her an answer sheet. Sakura nodded.

"I think I'll be okay, sensei," she said and then he moved on.

As it turned out, Sakura was way more than fine.

She tied for first place in test scores with Sasuke and Neji. Jaws dropped as students gathered around the bulletin board to see their results. Although her classmates crowded around her desk to congratulate her, Sakura had an extremely detached expression on her face. Their inane babble seemed to pass right through her. Eventually, they gave up on trying to talk to her and left Sakura to think in peace.

"Haruno," Gaara called. And Sakura turned around to face him and she half-smiled.

"Where were you?" the red-head demanded.

"I was in hell rearranging the order of my demon underlings," she replied. Gaara bristled, ready to snap at her for giving such a stupid response. But something in her gaze stopped him. Instead, he nodded his head and watched her continue to stare out the window.

* * *

Reviews are always appreciated!


	8. Resigned

I'm baaaaack! I was away from home until today so I ran home (nearly hit my neighbor's cat with my car) and went to type this real quick!

I'm sorry that I didn't leave any notice but it totally slipped my mind while I was getting ready and I only realized when I was unpacking my clothes the first night. So as an apology, here's an extra long chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 8: Resigned (Gaara Side 1)

Sakura had grown unusually quiet. At least, that was what Gaara thought. After the final, she hadn't even given him that sly smile and rubbed her score in his face. She hadn't even teased him about only ranking 18th in the entire school. In fact, all she seemed to do anymore was respond to questions and sigh a lot.

"Hey, Haruno, what's wrong with you?" he suddenly demanded during lunch one day. Sakura barely looked up from her untouched food.

"What?"

"You've been acting weird," Gaara said with a frown. His eyes trailed down to her uneaten rice and shrimp tempura. Sakura stabbed at the rice with her chopsticks. She leaned back in her seat, heaving a deep sigh.

There was the sighing again.

"Haruno," he said, in a patronizing tone. Sakura didn't even look at him. She focused her eyes on the square ceilings tiles. In response, Gaara grabbed her wrist and dragged her out of the classroom. The hushed gasps of their classmates leaked into the hallway as 20 pairs of eyes followed them. Sakura stumbled as she was jerked along by the arm down the hall and a flight of stairs. Gaara sat her on the bottom step with surprising sternness.

"Talk," he snapped as he crouched in front of her. Sakura's bright green gaze finally looked straight at him. The corner of her mouth curled into a derisive smile. There were dark smudges under her eyes. Her face was definitely paler than usual and even her scornful smirk had lost some of its spark. Gaara put his hand on her shoulder and froze. She was definitely thinner than she had been a few weeks ago.

"Haruno…"

"Shut up, Gaara. I don't need to hear it from you," Sakura snapped as she shook his hand away. The red-head exhaled noisily through his nostrils as he sat on the cool tile floor. He leaned back on his hands, resisting the urge to just grab the girl and shake some sense into her.

"Haruno, you've got to tell me if you're sick," he began. To his surprise, Sakura immediately bristled.

"That's none of your business!" she snapped, her eyes narrowing. Gaara blinked a few times. He stared at Sakura's livid expression, partly startled by her outburst and partly relieved that she still seemed to have enough energy to be angry.

"…Yes it is. I need to know if this is going to mess up our group next week," Gaara replied, trying to counter her anger with some rationality. Unfortunately, Sakura's scowl morphed into a murderous glare.

"Fuck you, Sabaku. You know I'm fine," she hissed, clenching her hands into fists. Gaara glared back at her, feeling the weak control over his temper slipping away. Sakura read his expression and her muscles automatically tensed, preparing for a fight. Instead, Gaara decided to hurt her in a more effective way.

"You know, you're going to be alone forever if you're such a bitch all the time," Gaara said, his low voice cracking out like a verbal whip. He wanted to see Sakura flinch and look surprised and maybe even a little sad. He wanted her to cry just a little. He wanted to see her break and prove that her heart wasn't made out of impenetrable steel.

Maybe, just maybe, if he could hurt her, it would prove that he could reach her.

Instead, Sakura's fist lashed out and connected with his cheek. The force threw Gaara flat on his back. The ceiling spun and stars danced in front of his eyes. Sakura stepped on his stomach none too gently as she stomped off, spitting curses that would have made a nun cry.

"Holy shit," Gaara wheezed as he listened to Sakura's footsteps echo around the hallways. Finally, the front door slammed shut, shaking the walls. It took about ten minutes for his vision to grow steady enough for him to sit up. He leaned against the stairs as he prodded at his tender cheek. There would definitely be a giant bruise on his face in a few hours.

"And I thought Temari was scary," he hissed through his teeth. And his aching face seemed to throb in assent.

He stumbled his way back up the stairs to the classroom. He was met with the usual glares and whispers when he sat back down and swallowed the rest of his lunch whole. When one of the girls dared to look him straight in the eyes, he gave her a malicious scowl, effectively scaring her and any other people away. Still, he felt eyes linger on the rapidly darkening bruise on the right side of his face. And although his expression was quite calm, inside, he was burning with disgrace and anger.

The day passed at a sluggish pace. Teachers' sentences seemed to drag on forever. It was impossible that the second hand on the clock was moving so slowly. Somehow, Gaara managed to survive through the prolonged boredom. As usual, he snuck out of classroom cleaning duties and instead casually followed after his homeroom teacher.

"Yes?" Kakashi said without looking up from what looked suspiciously like a porn book he had confiscated from one of his students. The redhead heaved a sigh and then shoved his hands in his pockets as he fell in step beside the older man.

"I…need your help… Copycat," Gaara whispered, keeping his head down. He felt the teacher's mismatched eyes snap to his face. They both stopped walking. Kakashi shut his book and tucked it under his arm. And for a moment, it looked like he smiled under his mask.

"Girl problems, Sabaku?" Kakashi inquired as he opened his book again. He leaned against the nearest wall, seemingly engrossed in his novel. But his dark, mismatched gaze focused on Gaara with burning intensity. Gaara refused to rise to the bait. He trained his gaze on a random spot on the ceiling. He clenched his fingers, feeling the shame clogging his throat. But the image of Sakura's enraged expression as she punched him was forever burned into his eyes. He had to let go of his pride.

"…yeah. I need to get Sakura's new address… Sensei," Gaara finally choked out. It killed him to have to ask anybody for help. And it was even worse that it was a person like Hatake Kakashi.

Kakashi stared him down for a good minute. The bastard seemed to enjoy watching him suffer. Finally, he scratched at his messy silver hair and motioned for Gaara to follow him.

"You know, I shouldn't be giving you this kind of information, Sabaku," Kakashi sighed as they entered the main office. He sat down in front of his computer and paused for a moment to give Gaara a pointed look.

"Pft. Former Yakuza's shouldn't be teachers either," Gaara snorted as he watched the teacher type a few things into the computer. He felt his left eye twitch when the older man took his time finding a pen and then a scrap of paper.

"Hm… You're probably right," muttered Kakashi as he scrawled the address across an old post-it note. Gaara immediately snatched it away. His eyes widened when he read the address. He scanned the words again and again until it finally sunk in.

"Sakura moved **here**?" Gaara wondered out loud. Kakashi chuckled, leaning back in his chair.

"I was pretty surprised myself when she told me. Then again, with an inheritance like that, who wouldn't?" he remarked. Gaara's bright green eyes landed on him, full of suspicion.

"What's that supposed to mean?" the redhead spat. The home economics teacher who had been lounging in the corner looked up from her newspaper. Kakashi smiled and waved and she quickly went back to reading.

"Listen, Gaara, be careful when you're dealing with a Haruno. Things never turn out well," Kakashi whispered, leaning in closer. A sickening chill ran down Gaara's spine. He tried to cover up his reaction by scowling. He took a few steps back, stealing a quick glance at the door.

"Well, don't forget to do your homework, Gaara. See you tomorrow," Kakashi said in his normal voice. His eyes crinkled as he gave his usual smile.

"Tch," Gaara sneered, turning on his heel and walking out of the room. As soon as the door slid shut, Gaara broke into a run. He ignored the strange looks that other students in the hall gave him as he slid down a flight of stairs, crammed his feet into his sneakers and bolted across the schoolyard.

It was the beginning of March and all of the snow had melted. Still, the air stung his lungs and face as he blindly ran to the nearest train station. His bruised cheek ached each time he opened his mouth to gulp down more air. With the metallic screech of metal wheels grinding to a halt ringing in his ears, Gaara climbed into a train car and plopped down in an empty seat. As the train sped away from the platform, he let his head loll back against the seat.

"Whoa, kid, did you get in a fight?"

Gaara looked up and found that it was an old man sitting across from him who had spoken.

"No… my girlfriend got mad at me," Gaara replied with a smirk. A look of total horror spread across the man's face. He quickly averted his gaze and didn't speak for the rest of the ride.

Gaara half-slept all the way until the lost stop. He stumbled out of the car with the last few passengers. His head throbbed and his mouth felt as dry as the desert as he climbed up the stairs and emerged on the sidewalk. He was in the middle of Uptown Konoha where the richest of rich lived. A few women carrying shopping bags eyed him with disgust, shoving past him to get to their waiting limos. Cramming his cold hands into his pockets, he walked and walked until the bustling streets changed to rolling lawns and giant mansions.

At the very top of a hill, overlooking a sparkling lake, was a house that easily qualified as a small castle. The long pathway leading up to the front door was trimmed with well-groomed topiaries and beds of exotic flowers. The walkway curved around a giant stone fountain that spurted a jet of clear water into the air. Gaara slowly made his way down the path and up the set of marble stairs. He paused in front of the large wooden door inlaid with squares of stained glass. The brass door knockers were in the shape of lions gnawing on a bouquet of flowers. For a horrible moment, he wondered if he had come to the wrong place. After all, Sakura's last apartment had been small and somewhat of a dump. How had she come to live in the richest neighborhood in Konoha?

Before he could actually reach out to knock, one of the doors swung open and a snooty-looking old man greeted him.

"Good evening, sir. How may I help you?"

"I need to speak to Haruno Sakura," Gaara spat, his tone immediately souring at the way the butler eyed him.

"Haruno-sama is in a meeting at the moment. Do you have an appointment, sir?" the man inquired in as condescending a tone as he could manage. Gaara gritted his teeth.

"No. But if you tell her that Sabaku no Gaara is here, she sho-" he began, trying to reign in his temper.

"I'm sorry but I cannot allow you entry without a previous appointment. Please come back at a later time after you have arranged for your visit. Good day to you, sir," the butler interrupted. He smiled and promptly slammed the door in Gaara's face.

"Hey! Open the door, old geezer!" Gaara shouted, pounding his fist against the heavy door. But it was silent and the snotty butler ignored the enraged redhead. So Gaara glowered at the door for a minute and then stomped over to sit on the very bottom of the elegant stone steps that led up to the equally elegant door. He eyed the perfectly manicured lawn with hatred.

"She has to come out of her house sometime," he huffed, crossing his arms over his chest.

As it turned out, nothing happened for a full three hours.

Gaara sat in the same, stubborn position, even as dark clouds gathered in the sky, blotting out the sun. Thunder boomed, lightning split the sky and rain poured from the heavens.

Even then, Gaara didn't even flinch. The rain soaked his clothes, drenched his hair and froze his entire body. His hands clenched into fists and he gritted his teeth so that they wouldn't chatter. Everything shook with each ominous crash of thunder. His eyes hurt each time white-hot lightning streaked across the sky. The fabric of his soggy uniform clung to his skin.

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" **her** familiar voice shouted as the front door burst open. Her hurried footsteps sloshed down the stairs and stopped in front of him. Very slowly, he looked up at her furious face. He squinted as rain splashed into his eyes. Sakura's chest heaved as she stared him down. Her eyes were red, like she had been crying. Gaara raked his hair out of his face and then shoved his hands in his pockets so she wouldn't notice that they were shaking. He willed his aching legs to help him stand and they did.

He took a step forward but she didn't back away.

"I was lying," Gaara breathed. His chest clenched painfully as the words left his mouth. But Sakura didn't hear him over the sound of rain falling and bouncing off of everything and the deep boom of thunder that shook the ground. She looked a lot less angry and a lot more confused.

"I WAS LYING!" he blurted out, feeling his frustration overtake him. He grabbed her shoulders. He was so desperate to make her finally understand.

Her light green eyes were wide as they stared up at them. And then, she closed them, letting her dark, wet lashes fan across her pale cheeks. Her eyebrows furrowed together like she was in pain just from hearing him speak. She twisted a little, trying to free herself from his grasp. But Gaara kept his grip firm.

He saw the panic build in her eyes. She was like a caged animal. Sakura's fingers scratched down his arms and chest.

"Let me go! Let me go, asshole!" she shrieked as her nail scraped across his forehead, just above his right eyebrow. Gaara flinched but he tightened his grip on her, more for her sake than his own. Her fist caught him just below his ribcage and he wheezed a little.

"LET ME GO! I DON'T WANT TO HEAR THIS RIGHT NOW!" Sakura screamed as she dug her nails into Gaara's chest. It stung, even through the fabric of his shirt and he could feel as she broke the skin.

At first, he hadn't been sure because of the pouring rain, but as Gaara stared into her half-crazed face, he could see tears gathering in her eyes and spilling down her cheeks. In fact, Sakura was sobbing. Her angry hands instead turned needy and wobbly as they clung to the front of his now red-stained shirt. He pushed her up against the nearest wall so that balcony above would shield her from most of the rain. Just in case she started trying to claw her way away again, he made sure his hands were still restraining her properly.

"Haruno…" Gaara began and her waterlogged eyes flickered up to his face, "I only said that to hurt you…I'm sorry." Even as the words left his mouth, they felt heavy and clumsy. Gaara rarely apologized to anyone. In fact, he could count the total number of times with both his hands. But Sakura, with her tear-swollen cheeks, red eyes and nasty right hook made him want to apologize a million times over if it would just make her go back to normal.

He hadn't expected her to exactly smile and pat him on the back. But he also hadn't anticipated her ferocious glare.

"This wasn't part of **the deal**, Sabaku," Sakura spat like it tasted bad on her tongue.

Gaara felt his sudden streak of chivalry shatter.

"I don't care, Haruno," Gaara said in the same, snippy tone. She glared at him like she wanted to gut him.

As usual, he found his gaze straying from her livid emerald eyes down to her small mouth. Her lips were parted as she tried to catch her breath from all her struggling. They were soft and plump and they made him wonder if he would be able to taste rain on them. Gaara felt his head tilt just the slightest bit towards Sakura.

And she immediately stopped struggling.

Was she… anticipating a kiss?

Gaara tore his eyes away from her tempting mouth and then looked up into her eyes. They were no longer angry. She was watching him with a kind of resigned curiosity. She had stopped crying, at least. He couldn't help but smirk a little at how unpredictable she was. Her eyes narrowed.

"You're crazy, Haruno," Gaara observed out loud. Almost immediately, he could see her temper flare. She tried to jerk her upper body back so he would stumble and she would be able to head-butt him and make a run for it.

Not happening.

"Let. Me. Go," she snarled through clenched teeth.

"No way, crazy," Gaara breathed before he leaned over and caught her angry mouth in a soft kiss. Despite her anger, Sakura's lips responded. And like he had expected, she tasted like sweet rainwater. Her hands tugged insistently on his shirt, demanding that he bend over to accommodate her smaller height. His restraining hands turned exploratory as he smoothed his fingers over her neck and tangled into her long hair.

"Wait, Gaara," she whispered when they just barely pulled apart to breathe. Her breath was like a hot caress against his mouth.

"No more waiting," Gaara sighed as he captured her lips again. She made a little noise in the back of her throat as her hands slid up to link around the back of his neck. The second time they came up for air, Sakura was almost smiling.

"No, stupid. I meant, 'Wait, Gaara, you're bleeding on me," Sakura explained, rolling her eyes. She pointed to the drops of red on her cheek. Gaara slowly lifted one hand to feel the spot where Sakura's nail had scratched him. It stung and when he looked down at his fingers, they were slick with blood. He glared down at her. Even though it was her fault, she shrugged, not at all apologetic.

"Come inside," she ordered as she took his bloody hand. They hurried through the pouring rain and ran up the stairs, splashing themselves with even more water. Sakura's soggy socks squelched with each step. She rapped on the door and the same uppity butler answered. There were a couple maids huddled behind him.

"Sakura-sama, please refrain from such reckless behavior," the old man sighed as he watched Sakura step into the house. He glanced at Gaara out of the corner of his eye and made to casually close the door on him. But Sakura suddenly turned around and tugged on Gaara's hand.

"What are you doing? Get in here," Sakura said, pushing past the butler and yanking Gaara over the threshold.

"Sakura-sama, are you certain that it is wise to let such people into the house?" the butler asked as the maids hovered around him like hummingbirds. Sakura's face suddenly hardened. She turned on her soggy heel to face the suddenly nervous butler. Her fingers tightened around Gaara's. Gaara, who had been quietly slipping off his waterlogged shoes, resisted the urge to wince at her vice-like grip.

"You would do well, Sakamoto, to remember whose house this is. Sabaku no Gaara here is my honored guest and a very important friend of mine. In the future, you will treat him with respect. Is that clear, Sakamoto?" Sakura spat, her voice livid.

The butler quickly nodded. And even though they weren't the ones being scolded, the present maids nodded too like a trio of bobblehead dolls.

"Good. Send up some tea to my room," Sakura snapped and then she dragged Gaara along. She stomped along the hardwood floor, leaving wet footprints in her wake. Gaara stared up at the ornate white ceilings trimmed with gold paint and decorated with crystal chandeliers every few yards. On the dark red walls were paintings of posh, old people dressed in furs and diamonds. At the very end of the hall, Sakura stopped and pushed a pair of double doors open.

"I think I might have some clothes that would fit you," she mused as she stepped into the room.

"….Haruno... this is your room?" Gaara demanded as he cautiously followed after her. He stepped carefully on the plush white carpet, trying his best not to drip too much water. There was a huge four-poster bed that could easily fit three people placed against the left wall. The wall directly across from him was nothing but tall windows that overlooked the perfect front lawn. On the right wall, there were two glass doors. In between them was a large painting of a little girl wearing a light blue dress and clutching a teddy bear. Gaara eyed the pink hair in pigtails.

"Is this okay?" Sakura asked, suddenly emerging from the door on the right. Gaara caught a glimpse of several racks of clothing behind her. But he forced himself to focus on Sakura, who was holding out a white long-sleeved shirt as well as a pair of dark sweatpants.

"There's the bathroom. You can shower and change in there," Sakura said, indicating the other door on the left. Gaara grudgingly accepted the dry clothes and slowly made his way to the door. He pulled the silver handle and resisted the urge to say something.

Sakura's bathroom was more like a full spa.

The floor and walls were covered in matching blue and white mosaic. There was a big sunken tub in the middle of the room surrounded by a glass ledge. There was a giant standing shower that could probably fit several people at once. In the corner was a door that probably led to the toilet. On the opposite wall were white marble counters complete with an elegant glass sink that sported a faucet that was fastened directly into the mirror mounted above the counter. There was even a heated rack filled with fluffy white towels.

Gaara shut the door behind him and sighed.

He had never even been in a hotel this luxurious, much less a home.

Still, without protest, he shed his clothes and stepped into the shower, soaking under the hot spray. He considered washing his hair but he eyed Sakura's "Hydralicious" shampoo, he decided against it. Instead, he settled on borrowing her soap and scrubbed away the smell of sweat that clung to him after running for so long. He would have fallen asleep under the rhythm of warm water pounding against his sore muscles, but he knew that Sakura was just as cold and just as soaked as he had been. He reluctantly shut off the water, rubbed his hair with a towel and dried his body before slipping on the clothes. They fit surprisingly well and Sakura had even slipped in a pair of dry boxers (although Gaara was unsure of why a girl would have boxers in the first place). He opened the bathroom door, still rubbing at his hair when he was confronted with Sakura sitting on the edge of her bed.

Sakura's slim fingers were combing through her wet hair. Her cheeks were slightly pink, as if she had just stepped out of a warm shower too. When Gaara quietly sat down beside her, she looked up with a vague smile.

"That was quick," she commented. Gaara's eyes strayed to the flushed skin of her neck and chest over her white robe. Sakura didn't notice as she squeezed water from the tips of her hair with her towel.

"I thought you would shower next," he explained, crossing his legs Indian-style on the bed. Sakura peered over at him through her thick hair.

"Ah, I showered next door. You could have taken your time," Sakura said as she finished patting her hair dry. Gaara didn't say anything. He didn't know what to say that would make the conversation any less awkward. Apparently, Sakura didn't either because she fell silent too. She turned her head away to stare down at the floor.

"Excuse me, Sakura-sama," a voice called through the door, breaking the tension. Sakura slid off the bed, hiking up the front of her robe and opened the door just enough to poke her head out.

"Ah…um… Sakamoto-san instructed me to collect your wet clothes," the voice of a timid maid stuttered. Sakura said something in an annoyed, sharp voice as Gaara ducked into the bathroom and retrieved his clothes. He leaned over her shoulder to toss the wet garments at the terrified maid.

"Th-thank you. Here is your t-t-tea," the maid blurted out. With a quick bow, she clutched the clothes to her chest and practically ran down the hall.

"Are they all afraid of you?" Gaara inquired as he watched Sakura wheel the silver cart into the room. She parked it directly beside her bed and pulled the silver cover off of the top. There was a white and blue tea pot with two sets of matching cups and saucers as well as little glass canisters filled with milk and lumps of sugar.

"…yeah," Sakura replied after some thought. She began pouring tea into the cups. She handed a cup and saucer to Gaara before settling on the bed with hers. He eyed the dark brown liquid carefully as he sat on the edge of the bed near Sakura's feet.

"It's not poisoned," she assured him as she dipped her finger into the tea and took an experimental lick. She observed the tea for another moment before taking a long sip.

"You know how to figure that out?" Gaara demanded. The more he seemed to learn about Sakura, the more she seemed to surprise him. He set the untouched cup back on the cart and crawled over to sit beside her. Sakura's tongue darted out to wet her bottom lip.

"I learned when I was five after someone poisoned my chocolate milk," Sakura replied in an oddly tart tone. Her green eyes narrowed as she stared down at her cup, probably reliving an unpleasant memory.

"What happens if there is poison?" he prodded, even more curious. She looked up at her with such a cold smile that it chilled him straight to the bone.

"I eat anyway. I've been fed poisons since I was four. I'm immune to a lot of them," Sakura simply said like it was the most common thing in the world. She drained her cup and set it on the nightstand.

"Haruno, where are your parents?" Gaara suddenly asked, realizing that this girl seemed to be all alone in a huge mansion.

"My mother killed herself when I was five. My father was murdered," she responded with a shrug.

Sakura was all alone.

Gaara peeked at her out of the corners of his eyes. She was leaning against a big pillow, staring up at the ornate ceiling. The right side of her mouth was curved up into a smile that didn't reach her big eyes. His hand twitched in her direction one or two times. He wanted desperately to do something to make that half-hearted, fake expression disappear.

"Both my parents are dead too," he finally said, hating how lame it sounded to his own ears.

"I see," Sakura simply replied, not looking away from the ceiling.

"Haruno, stop looking like that!" Gaara snapped, grabbing her arm. Sakura stared him directly in the eyes.

"Looking like what?" she demanded.

"Like you're not even alive. Like you're ready to die."

"I don't look like that." Sakura looked a little hurt as she said so in a small voice. The corners of her mouth turned down. She turned her head away from him while roughly shaking her wrist free from his hand.

He had hurt her again.

Gaara raked his hands through his wet hair. He sighed.

"Haruno," he said. Sakura refused to look at him. Even when he nudged her arm, she remained limp and uncooperative.

"Haruno, you're being unreasonable," said Gaara. He had intended to sound a little nicer, but the words came out impatient and rough. Very slowly, Sakura's head turned in his direction. Tears were falling from her eyes again. Her breath came in shaky gasps as she forced her lips in such a fake smile that it hurt Gaara to watch her.

"I know. Here, let me treat your wounds," Sakura sniffed as she crawled off the bed and retrieved a first-aid kit from somewhere in the big closet. When she returned, she was still crying. She didn't even make an effort to wipe her tears as she rubbed ointment onto the scratch on his forehead with a shaking hand. When Gaara reached out to brush them away, she flinched. So he settled for waiting for her to finish sticking on a bandage.

"You're crazy, Haruno," Gaara whispered, repeating his words from before. But instead of being upset, she began to cry even harder. The tube of antiseptic cream fell from her fingers as she covered her face with her hands. She was so small and pale as she tried to muffle the sounds of her sobs. Gaara put his arm around her shoulders and pressed her against his chest. He hid her face so she wouldn't be ashamed of crying in front of him.

"You know, Haruno, I might sort of be in love with you," he sighed as he looked up at ceiling.

Sakura twisted her fingers into his shirt and she didn't push him away.

And for now, that was enough.

* * *

Oh man I didn't realize how depressing this was. Well, the next chapter is finally going to be the tournament so there should be minimal... angsting. From here on, everything will continue to be in Sakura's voice but I thought it would be nice to get to know what Gaara's been thinking.

And for anyone that noticed, but Gaara calling Sakura unreasonable is almost exactly what someone else said in an earlier chapter.

Hmm should I offer a prize for the first person who figures it out?

We'll see! (please insert obnoxious laughter here)

Anyway, as always, reviews are very-much appreciated!


	9. Typical

Life crisis averted and balance has been restored. In other words, I'll continue to post new chapters weekly from now on. I was tempted to actually have some of the tournament matches take place, but I do love a good cliffhanger.

Enjoy!

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 9: Typical

Time did whatever the hell it wanted. At least, that was what Sakura felt.

Because it felt like the day she had moved to Konoha, everything had unraveled. And the king, the one who should have been moving all the pawns on the battlefield, was dead and suddenly everything had been thrust into Sakura's shaking hands. Somewhere in between, she had roped Gaara in so that her school life would be marginally tolerable. It had been successful and she had kept Hyuuga and Uchiha from nosing their way into dangerous territory. But in the process, Sakura had lost something dear to her.

She had lost her purpose.

Sakura opened her eyes and she was lying on her back on the floor of her spacious kitchen. The ceiling lights were swirling around in dizzying circles. There were fluttering hands around her face and neck. High-pitched voices thrummed in the background. Several hands pushed her into a sitting position.

Her head hurt.

"Sakura, are you alright?" Itachi's familiar voice demanded through the vague hum of voices. Sakura forced her gaze to focus on the red eyes in front of her. She nodded her head once in an unsteady jerk before she closed her eyes again.

Sakura opened her eyes again. She was in school, sitting in her usual spot. Her head was propped up in her hand, angled towards the window. The clouds outside were fat and white. It was oddly quiet in the classroom. So she slowly turned her gaze to the teacher standing in front of the room.

"Well, Haruno-san? Can you answer this question?" Kurenai-sensei inquired, tapping the problem on the board. Sakura's limbs felt oddly sluggish and heavy as she stood and made her way to the front of the room. She stared at the long calculus problem etched in white chalk. There was a snicker from the front row and she instinctively knew it was Karin.

The teacher heaved a sigh and moved forward to pry the chalk from Sakura's limp fingers. But as soon as she drew closer, Sakura's arm shot up and she began scrawling numbers across the blackboard. The numbers blurred into each other as she let the left side of her brain soak in the figures and spit something back up. She finished writing the last few symbols and dropped the chalk on the teacher's desk before sitting back at her seat.

"Well… Like I said before, this is the type of math you can expect to see once you get into university. Apparently, Haruno-san has already encountered this sort of material," Kurenai said, a fake smile stretching her bright red lips. Sakura felt the entire class's collective gaze burning into her head. But worst of all, she could feel Gaara watching her intensely.

It made her headache worse.

Sakura felt her tired eyes ease shut again. When she opened them once more, she was in the secret meeting room at Akatsuki headquarters. All eyes were focused on her there too. She was vaguely aware of a sweet, cloying scent that filled her senses.

"Where am I?" Sakura whispered as she stared into Pein's searching gaze. He opened his mouth but it wasn't his voice that left it.

"You passed out in the dojo. This is our living room. Sorry it's such a mess," Kankuro's kind voice responded. Sakura blinked but she was still in the dark meeting room. She turned her gaze to Zetsu and he scowled.

"What's today's date?" she demanded.

"Did you hit your head? It's March 23rd. We just had the end of year ceremony today," Zetsu scoffed in Gaara's usual arrogant tone. Sakura pressed her palms to her throbbing temples as she tried to think. Finally, she sucked in a deep breath and opened her eyes again.

"I need a cigarette," she hissed through clenched teeth. There was a soft rustling noise and then something was pressed into her palm. But it was quickly snatched away before she could close her fingers around it.

"Sakura only smokes those French ones," Gaara's voice sighed as more rustling occurred. Finally, another cool cigarette was shoved into her right hand. Sakura fumbled around her neck for the familiar silver chain. A warm hand guided her fingers to the smooth metal links. She pulled until she felt the comforting weight of the rectangular lighter weighing in her palm. She ran her thumb down the side of the lighter and listened to the click that accompanied the sudden warmth near her finger. Sakura held her cigarette near the heat and heard the sizzle of paper catching fire.

She blinked again, and through the flames from her lighter, she could see Kankuro peering over Gaara's shoulder. She took a long drag on the cigarette, letting the nicotine seep into her scrambled brain. She exhaled and then blinked again. She could feel the perfume of her cigarette smoke overpowering the repulsively sweet scent filling her nostrils.

A thousand images filled her brain: Itachi half-smiling in a way that always seemed a little condescending, Kisame's sharp teeth as he opened his mouth in a loud laugh, Sasori's look of concentration as he read, her brother rubbing his hand over his stubble after a long night of work. She could see Danzo-sama's long, cold fingers holding the newspaper.

"Are you alright?" Sakura turned her gaze to the voice. She found jade staring back at her. Sakura blinked again. And past Itachi in his black blazer and white shirt, she could see the outline of Gaara's frowning mouth. Itachi reached into his pocket and pulled out a small gun. He set it on the table in front of him and inclined his head.

"What's wrong?" Gaara demanded. He frowned, creating wrinkles on his pale forehead.

Sakura grasped at the gun on the table. She felt the cool metal against her fingers. But another part of her knew that her fingers were clenched around air. Still, she couldn't stop herself from raising the gun to her head and pressing the cold barrel against her temple.

"Haruno," Gaara whispered. His hand grazed the side of her face.

"Do I pull the trigger?" Sakura asked out loud. Itachi laced his fingers together and nodded.

"What happens… when you pull the trigger, Haruno?" Gaara's voice inquired from far away. Sakura's finger froze against the cold metal. She felt her hand trembling. The metallic parts in the gun rattled. She sucked in another deep breath, feeling the hot smoke trailing down her throat.

"I wake up," she finally replied. She saw Itachi's mouth pull down into a frown. He reached out for her, mouthing words that she knew she wouldn't hear. And with Gaara's worried eyes burning in her, she let her finger curl around the trigger and pull.

* * *

"Haruno."

Sakura didn't open her eyes. Instead, she listened. There was the steady ticking of a clock somewhere in the room. Skin rubbed against fabric. Someone coughed but tried to muffle the harsh noise. She took a deep breath and recognized the smell of sandalwood.

"Gaara," she said. She felt a weight shift beside her. He let out an audible sigh. She couldn't tell if he was relieved or annoyed. His fingers ghosted over her temples.

"Where am I?" she demanded.

"My room. What's wrong with you? You were talking in your sleep," Gaara replied.

Sakura let her eyes finally flutter open. The room was dark except for the single lamp on Gaara's desk. The futon underneath her body was soft and clean, smelling faintly of cheap laundry detergent. She experimentally curled her toes and stretched her back. Her body felt surprisingly rested. Her eyes lingered on the tall bookcases taking up an entire wall. There were foreign titles, American ones that she recognized as classics. There were some manga crammed in between. Somehow, that didn't surprise Sakura at all.

A faint smile touched her lips as her gaze landed on Gaara. He sat on the futon beside her, an unlit cigarette resting between his lips. His back was pressed against the wall. Feeling her eyes on him, he turned his head towards her.

"These taste like shit," he complained, pointing at the cigarette in his mouth. Sakura noticed a pack of Galouises open in his lap. She snatched one out of the box and stuck it between her lips. Her fingers searched for the chain around her neck only to find it missing. Her eyes flew to Gaara who stood and retrieved the lighter from his desk drawer.

"We took it off because it was restricting your throat or something," he muttered, tossing it in her lap. Sakura carefully examined the lighter, running her fingers along the edges and checking the chain for any damage. Gaara flopped down beside her and watched her frantic inspection. When she deemed it unharmed, Sakura flicked the top open and lit her cigarette. She offered the orange flame to Gaara who made a face. Still, he poked the tip of the cigarette into the fire and let it sizzle a bit before sticking the other end in his mouth.

"What happened?" Sakura demanded after she sucked in a long breath. She exhaled smoke in a neat ring as she waited. Gaara scowled.

"We were sparring downstairs and you suddenly collapsed. We carried you up to the living room and Mr. Pre-Med said it was probably-"

"Stress, fatigue and possibly malnutrition," Sakura interrupted. She ignored the confused stare Gaara gave her. She sucked at the end of her cigarette and rolled the bitter flavor around her mouth for a bit before she exhaled.

Gaara's hand closed around her right wrist. It was a habit he had recently picked up. He would suddenly **have to** be touching some part of her body, like he had to confirm that she was really there. It didn't bother Sakura too much. But sometimes, it confused her. Like after sparring, they would be lying on the ground, aching and sweating and too tired to even stand. And he would reach over and touch the back of her hand. Just a light, gentle touch and then act like nothing had happened.

"It's what doctors always say to me. I'm not surprised that Kankuro thought so too," she whispered. Gaara's fingers squeezed a little and then fell away.

"The tournament's tomorrow," Gaara suddenly said. Sakura glanced over at his nonchalant expression and she was secretly grateful that he changed the subject.

"Yeah."

"We should leave at around seven or eight in the morning."

"Alright."

"Are you going to be ok?"

Sakura felt an arrogant smile stretch her face. It had been a while since she had used it so it felt rusty and awkward. Still, she tilted her head to the side, displaying confidence that she honestly didn't feel. And from Gaara's expression, she knew that he wasn't deceived at all.

"Are you really asking me that? Worry about yourself, Sabaku," she replied as she stood. Her legs wobbled a little but she quickly steadied her body. Gaara's narrowed green eyes stared into her face, letting her know that he had noticed. Sakura sucked in another deep breath through her teeth before she ground out her cigarette in the ashtray on Gaara's desk. She felt Gaara stand behind her. His breath felt too close, hot against the back of her neck.

"You're not fooling me, Haruno. What's wrong with you?" he whispered. His words fluttered across her skin before digging deep into her chest. She wanted to flinch away from him. Why did he always know exactly what to say to hurt her?

"I'm not trying to fool **you**. Good night, Gaara," Sakura replied. She turned around, only to meet Gaara's searching gaze. He reached out and pushed a stray lock of hair out of her face. She shivered.

"You remember right? I'm in love with you, Haruno."

Sakura slowly backed out of his reach. She walked until she felt the doorknob digging into her back. The intensity in Gaara's eyes scared her. It made her want to grab him and shake him until he would stop looking at her that way.

"You don't love me, Gaara," she said. Her voice sounded too small, too unsure. His eyes, full of childish innocence and old anger wouldn't leave her face. His expression hardened. His lips pulled into a smirk that seemed far too cruel on his face.

"You're right. I don't love you. I'm in love with you."

Sakura reached behind and twisted the knob. It slid underneath her sweaty palm before the lock finally clicked and the thin door swung open. Cool air from the rest of the home rushed into the room. Her face felt too hot as she slowly backed out of the cramped bedroom. To her dismay, Gaara followed her, matching each of her steps with his usual calm arrogance. In an instant, he was standing in front of her. The cigarette smoldered lazily between his full lips.

"What's the difference?" she managed to choke out. Gaara pinched the cigarette between his thumb and pointer finger as he slowly lowered his head towards Sakura's face. When he was eyelevel with her, he smirked.

"Good night, Sakura," Gaara simply whispered as he pressed his lips to hers in a chaste kiss. His lips tasted like tobacco: a little bitter and strangely addicting. And even though she had convinced herself that she didn't like kissing him, she felt a stab of disappointment when he pulled away. His thumb brushed against her cheek as he looked straight into her eyes. Then, with one last cruel smile, he left Sakura standing mutely in the hallway.

It took a full minute for her to be able to remember how to walk properly. She gathered her composure and what remained of her dignity. Her feet automatically dragged her through the hallway and to the foyer. Temari and Kankuro were peeking out of the kitchen, watching her with eyes burning with curiosity and a hint of fear. She lifted her hand in greeting as she pulled on her sneakers.

"Hey, Sakura, can you get here by seven tomorrow morning?" Kankuro inquired as he poked his head farther out of the kitchen. She nodded once before she opened the door and climbed down the narrow wooden stairs. She slowly sat on the bottom step, buried her face in her hands and tried to stop the hot tears from burning down her cheeks.

**

* * *

**

The two hour ride in Kankuro's car was awkward.

Sakura, sitting in the passenger seat, stared out the window the entire time. She never spoke; she never once turned towards her teammates. Her eyes were focused on the landscape that steadily grew drier and sandier. Gaara, sprawled across the back seat, occupied his time by "mediating", which meant that he closed his eyes and almost slept.

Kankuro mashed his lips together and silently wished for the ride to be over.

They were stopped once at the border between Konoha and Iwa. The guard had taken one look at Sakura's name, bowed repeatedly and politely ushered them through the checkpoint without even looking at Kankuro and Gaara's papers. Kankuro shot Sakura a strange look, which she pointedly ignored. Instead, she politely recited directions to their hotel. When Kankuro parked the car and unlocked the doors, Gaara jumped up, grabbed all the luggage (except for his brother's) and strode off into the hotel lobby, leaving Sakura confused and slightly amused. She left Kankuro to grumble about his little brother and followed the redhead into the hotel. He was already arguing with the man at the front desk.

"Excuse me. Is there a problem here?" she asked, smoothly cutting into the argument. The snobby man sniffed a little.

"This young man claims to have a room reserved under the name Haruno Sakura. We have no such records," he explained with a little toss of his head. Gaara snarled in response but Sakura calmly put her hand on his arm as she dug in her pocket. She extracted a clear credit card and set it on the counter in front of her. The man carefully picked it up like it was an ancient artifact. He read the name on the front, mouthed it once, and then glanced up at the pink-haired girl in front of him.

"Is something the matter?" she inquired with a cold smile.

"N-Not at all. Please allow me to get your keys," he sputtered, ducking under the counter. Sakura met Gaara's questioning stare with a shrug. When the man resurfaced, he handed over two plastic cards with trembling hands.

"Should I call for a porter to carry your luggage, ma'am?" he inquired, not quite meeting Sakura's eyes. She shook her head, bid him a good day and headed to the elevators with Gaara in tow. They waited in front of the gold doors as Kankuro ran up to them with a bag tucked under each arm.

"Thanks for taking care of the rooms, Sakura. It's been crazy just trying to manage the dojo and my baby brother," Kankuro said, jabbing Gaara in the ribs with his elbow. Sakura snorted when Gaara responded by slapping his older brother in the back of the head. Kankuro sidled up beside Sakura, using her as a shield from Gaara's wrath. She laughed even harder when Gaara dumped his suitcases into Kankuro's arms.

"Stupid brother," Gaara muttered as he put his arm around Sakura. She didn't even realize what the red-head was doing until she caught Kankuro gaping at her. Even then, she let Gaara pull her close as they watched the numbers above the elevator slowly decrease.

And then, the elevator doors opened and a few different things happened at once:

1. Uchiha Sasuke, Hyuuga Neji, Uzumaki Naruto and Hatake Kakashi were in the elevator.

2. Gaara stared at the other team like he wanted to commit homicide.

3. Sakura mentally let out a long scream of frustration.

4. Naruto's jaw dropped.

But on the outside, Sakura simply smiled and pressed herself a little closer to Gaara's side. She felt his hand slide down to her waist. By now, she was almost used to the way Sasuke's dark eyes narrowed and then flickered up to meet hers before filling with bitter hatred and burning holes into Gaara's smug face.

"Sabaku," Sasuke said, tight-lipped and unsmiling.

"Uchiha," spat Gaara with equal venom.

"Sakura-chan? What are you doing here?" Naruto blurted out as the team sidled out of the elevator. Suddenly, all eyes were fixed on Sakura who stopped smiling. She met Kakashi's mismatched gaze. His eyes crinkled, like he was laughing at her from behind his mask.

"Ah… I guess you'll see tomorrow," she said, quirking a half-smile in Kakashi's direction between lacing her fingers with Gaaras'. And then, she inclined her head in Sasuke's direction and slipped past the stunned boys into the elevator. As the silver doors slid shut, she saw realization streak across Kankuro's painted face. He fumbled with the bags in his arms as he shoved past the other team.

"Hey! What about m-"

"Haruno, you're a bitch," Gaara simply said as he watched the doors slam closed in front of his brother's face. The sound of Kankuro's fists banging against the doors faded as the elevator rose.

"Mhm."

* * *

"Do you hear that?" Sakura whispered. Kankuro, who had been winding bandages around his knuckles, looked up. He arched an eyebrow but didn't say anything. Sakura ran her hand along what had once been a vanity table. But the white paint was faded to an ugly shade of pale green and the mirror was cracked in half. She scanned the room, mentally noting the number of other teams milling around. The room had used to be a dressing room in a famous theatre but everything had been torn down and renovated and only this musty, crumbling room remained untouched.

"It's pretty loud in here, kiddo. I don't know what you heard," Kankuro replied. Sakura sat on the matching stool, peered into the broken mirror and met Gaara's gaze from across the room. He was sprawled across an ancient sofa that looked ready to collapse under its own weight. His jade eyes narrowed before they closed completely. Sakura copied him, pressing her palms to the tops of her thighs. She planted her feet firmly against the worn tiled floor.

There was a distant rumble, the sound of thousands of voices all speaking at once. The vibrations travelled up the soles of her feet, tingling against her fingertips. Sakura sucked in a deep breath, tasting the moldy air. She could feel her long hair tickling the back of her neck. She could hear the rustle of fabric rubbing against fabric. She could taste the sweat, feel the adrenaline, smell the metallic tang of blood.

"Let's go," Gaara said. Sakura felt the phantom pain in her chest under her tattoo. It throbbed. She could feel the thick, dark blood flowing down her chest. Her lungs worked frantically to breathe around the sharp, biting pain. But when she opened her eyes, she scraped her short nails down her skin, feeling only her own sweat. Gaara and Kankuro were standing in front of her. The other teams were already shoving their way to the metal door that led to the arena.

"Haruno?"

Sakura stared up into Gaara's pale face. His shaggy red hair was secured back in a short ponytail at the base of his neck. Before she realized what she was doing, she reached out her hand, beckoning for him to come closer. To her surprise, Gaara complied. He leaned over and she pressed her palm to his hot cheek. Gaara exhaled sharply as she pulled him closer, their mouths hovering so close together that their lips brushed against each other when she spoke.

"You're going to win," she whispered.

He lightly pressed his lips to hers before curling his mouth into his signature smirk.

"Who do you think you're talking too?" he replied as he pulled her to her feet.

Together, the three of them: Haruno Sakura, Sabaku no Gaara and Sabaku no Kankuro. They quietly exited the old dressing room and made their way down the long, narrow corridor. And at the very end of the hallway, Kankuro pushed the door open and sunlight beat down on them. The roar of the waiting crowd was deafening as they sat down in their reserved seats.

Sakura felt Sasuke, a few rows down, glowering up at her. Kakashi, who was sitting beside him, looked up from his orange book and saluted her. Naruto waved. Neji looked surly as ever. And Gaara, absorbed in conversation with his brother, kept sneaking glances her way.

Sakura sneered.

This was going to be interesting.

* * *

Review are always encouraged and appreciated!


	10. Irrationality

Sorry guys. Short chapter because I've kind of hit a wall with this part. I can safely say, however, that the story is drawing to a close. Enjoy!

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 10: Irrationality

It had taken 8 weeks to overthrow her father's entire empire. His old agents and the double-crossers were quickly disposed of. The drug trafficking and extortion was stabilized under strong leadership and the pharmaceutical company, Kunoichi, raked in billions of dollars in profits. This new empire had strengthened its grip on the financial word as well as the underworld.

And its leader wasn't even of legal drinking age.

Sakura crossed her right leg over the right and leaned back in her seat. She glanced down at the battle taking place in the arena below. The opponents were inexperienced and far too young to put on a good show. Sweat beaded across her forehead. It was far too hot in the crowded stadium. She shot a quick glance at Gaara and found his gaze focused on her. She uncrossed her legs and reversed the positions, revealing a generous slice off thigh to Gaara.

It had been a while since Sakura had worn her combat clothes. The sleeveless red shirt with the Haruno symbol on the back fit perfectly. The fabric was soft and stretchy and Sakura suspected that it would come out unscathed from a fire. Normally, she wore black leggings under her tan mini-skirt. Even though it was Iwa, land of rugged mountain ranges and land of nearly 6-months of snow, and it was too hot. A heat wave had settled over the area, leaving Sakura's arms sweaty whenever they made contact with anything or anyone. Determined to avoid heat stroke, she had abandoned the leggings, a decision that had proven both impractical and practical. She toed off her knee-high boots and wiggled her toes in the momentary breeze.

Sakura felt Gaara's gaze slide down to her leg. She kept her eyes trained on the match as she sensed his body heat move closer to her. His fingers tentatively brushed her skin once. She heard Gaara suck in a breath under the excited chatter of the crowd. He tried once again, this time pressing his entire hand on her outer thigh. His big palm felt hot against her skin. Very slowly, he slid his hand down an inch and then back up. His calloused fingers were rough, masculine.

"Winner! Iyami! Team Mist advances! Team Grass is eliminated!' the announcer shouted and the crowd exploded in deafening cheers.

Sakura slowly looked over to meet Gaara's clear jade eyes. He quirked the strangest smile as he lightly squeezed her thigh. He thought he had the upper hand. Sakura smirked and she licked her lower lip, watching his cheeks flush. His pale cheeks grew pink and looked away from her.

Sakura smiled.

So predictable.

"Team Suna versus Team Sound!" the announcer boomed. Sakura sucked in a deep breath and Gaara's hand relaxed against her leg. Kankuro stood, keeping his eyes trained on the arena below. The loser of the previous match was taken away on a white stretcher. Sakura met Gaara's eyes with a thin smile. He stood, letting his fingers brush against her skin.

"That's us," he quietly said.

Sakura stood and shoved her feet back in her boots. She felt Gaara's hand grip her wrist. His fingers were strong, unwavering.

"Are you nervous?" he whispered against her cheek. His gentle voice pierced her chest as she closed her eyes. She could feel the eyes on her: wary, curious, bitter. Kankuro cleared his throat and shuffled his feet.

"No," she breathed.

His mouth was cool against hers for a moment and then he took her hand and pulled her down the stairs to the arena. The stone steps echoed with their slow footfalls. Sakura rubbed her hand along the cold walls as she made her way to the waiting room. There were a few paramedics lounging around and a mousy man with a clipboard. He ushered the three of them to the locked steel door.

"Team Suna on standby," he muttered into walkie-talkie. There was a faint crackle and then someone replied back.

"Which one of you is going first?" he demanded as he scrawled something on his clipboard. Kankuro glanced at Gaara and then Sakura. His lips curled into a proud smile as he took a step forward.

"Me. I can't let my baby brother take the spotlight first," he said with a laugh.

Kankuro was knocked down in four minutes and twenty-three seconds.

It took a lot of brute force and he had taken a few strong blows to the face, but in the end, it was a brutal knee to the temple that sent him sprawling. Sakura and Gaara watched from the television screen in the waiting room. She unconsciously reached over and gripped his strong hand as they watched Kankuro's unmoving form on the ground. She felt Gaara's fingers tighten over hers. As soon as the referee announced Kankuro's loss, the metal door burst open and the medics dragged him inside. Gaara stood from his chair and shoved his brother in the seat. Sakura eyed the blood dripping down Kankuro's face with concern.

"Kankuro!" she said as she slapped at his cheeks. Very slowly, Kankuro's eyes fluttered open. He stared in a dazed way up at the ceiling and then noticed Sakura hovering over him. He blinked once and then seemed to register what had happened and lowered his eyes.

"Who's up next?" the man in the clipboard demanded.

Sakura felt Gaara's questioning eyes on her face. He slowly released her hand. Her fingers prickled as the blood rushed back in. With a faint smile, he made his way to the door.

"Gaara!" Sakura exclaimed, seized with a sudden fear. She grabbed his arm with a desperation that she didn't fully understand. But she needed to see his face one more time. She was terrified. Even though she had seen him fight a million times, it didn't matter. She was scared of seeing his strong back suddenly walk away from her.

Gaara turned to face her. He ignored the clipboard man's obnoxious coughing and cupped her face in his hands. Sakura's emerald eyes were wide as she stared up at him.

"Be careful," she whispered. She shivered when he pressed his lips against her forehead.

"Don't worry, Hime," he replied and then disappeared out the door.

Sakura felt her face grow hot. Had he just called her 'Hime'?

* * *

"What was so important that you called me at 3 in the morning, yeah?" he demanded as he pulled a cigarette out of his pocket and held it out to Sasori. Sasori accepted it with a grimace. He lit both their cigarettes and frowned when the rich smell of Gaulouises filled the air. Out of pure formality, he took a drag and then ground it out under his heel.

"Those taste terrible," Sasori remarked as he watched the smoke curl up from the smoldering end.

"If you're just going to complain about my smokes, I'm leaving," he sighed as he picked up his black trench coat.

"Just watch the next two matches. You'll see," Sasori replied as he wiped his hand across his mouth. And Deidara's icy blue eyes turned to the arena just as a tall red-head strutted in.

"Hm? You looking to recruit that one, yeah?" he inquired as the red-head's opponent joined him in the ring. They quickly shook hands and retreated to opposite sides of the round arena. From the safety of the VIP box high above, Deidara observed with mild interest. He tossed his coat on an empty chair and leaned his hip against the window ledge.

The referee blew his whistle but neither opponent moved. They slowly circled; drawing closer and closer to one another like some inevitable force was bringing them together. The crowd began to grumble until the opponent from Sound suddenly lunged. The redhead smoothly stepped to the side and avoided impact.

"He's playing around," Deidara mused as he watched the redhead step around avoiding the blows. It took just a few minutes for his opponent to wear himself out. When his opponent paused to catch his breath, the redhead smashed his fist into the boy's stomach, making him double over in pain. Without hesitation, he slammed his hand into the back of his neck, sending him sprawling across the ground.

"Abumi Zaku is unconscious! Winner! Sabaku!" the referee roared and the audience exploded into wild applause. As the paramedics ran out to drag the loser off the ground, Deidara turned back to Sasori.

"So…how is she?" Deidara asked after taking a long drag on his fragrant cigarette.

A sudden silence fell over the chattering crowd. A name rippled through the people, passing from mouth to mouth like a tsunami gathering strength. And then, with a resounding crash, someone loudly gasped, "The Black Widow!" Slowly, Deidara looked back down at the arena and his lit cigarette fell on the floor. It burned a hole in the carpet, sizzling angrily until Sasori stomped it out under his polished shoe.

Deidara pressed his palms against the window. He stared down at the tiny figure with a slim waist and long legs do a few simple stretches. The pink hair that flowed down her back made his stomach flip-flop.

"Sakura," he whispered, his dark nails scraping down the window.

And he watched her walk up to her opponent and felt his heart tear in two neat pieces.

* * *

"Sak," Tsuchi Kin sneered as she grabbed Sakura's hand. She squeezed like she was trying to break all the bones in Sakura's fingers. Sakura calmly squeezed back until Kin retreated, massaging her sore hand. Still trying to maintain her dignity, Kin smirked.

"I'm surprised to see you even made it here," Kin laughed, tossing back her long black hair. Sakura cocked her head to one side.

"I'm surprised you're not pregnant yet," Sakura shot back. The smile faded from Kin's face. Her face twisted into an ugly scowl. She tightened her hands into fists, taking an offensive stance. Sakura adjusted the Velcro on her gloves, flexed her fingers once and then casually looked up at Kin, waiting, taunting her.

The referee's shrill whistle pierced the air.

Kin began slowly circling and Sakura copied her. It was a macabre dance. Neither drawing closer, neither drifting away. An invisible puppeteer pulled them in a perfect waltz. And in the end, only one would be left with its strings intact. The audience watched with tense expressions. It was completely silent: no happy chatter or interested commentary. Dead silence.

"You've got guts showing your face here after running from Oto," Kin jeered, her dark eyes darting from Sakura's flexing fingers to the mild look of contempt on her face. Their quiet footsteps scraped against the dirt floor.

"Running? I moved on my father's orders. What was there to run from? You?" Sakura replied back in a completely calm voice. Kin growled but didn't break the deadly circle. She continued to slowly move around, matching each of Sakura's steady steps.

"You were jealous that I was screwing your Daddy," Kin spat, drawing senbon from her back pouch. Sakura's jaw clenched but she refused to rise to the bait. Instead, she forced her hands to remain steady as she reached back and slowly drew her katana from its sheath.

A murmur rippled through the crowd. This was the first match that was utilizing actual weapons.

Inner Sakura twitched, anxious to escape the tenuous hold that kept her from bursting forward and smashing the other girl's face into the ground. Sakura lightly drew her thumb across the edge of the sword. A thin stream of blood trickled from her skin, painting the side of the katana red. She glanced down at the crimson and looked back up at Kin.

They both stopped moving.

"He was good in bed, Sak. And he bought me anything I wanted. I'm almost sad the old geezer's dead," Kin continued with a high-pitched laugh. The sound made Sakura's head throb.

Sakura's hands began to tremble. She tightly gripped the sword, refusing to accept the other girl's words. But Inner Sakura slowly tore through her chest, threatening to burst free.

"Or maybe you were jealous that I had everything. What do you have? **Nothing**. Even your brother abandoned you," Kin whispered with a sneer on her lips.

There was a loud clang as Sakura lunged forward, swinging her katana in a high arc. It sliced neatly through the air, landing on one of Kin's metal arm guards. Sakura took a deep breath, feeling the strain in her arms and the hot anger building up in her chest.

'Let go,' Inner Sakura hissed, clawing angrily at her confines.

And Sakura closed her eyes and let the burning hatred consume her. The fury flowed into her limbs like hot liquid. When she opened her eyes again, she stared straight at Kin. She took a step back, taking a few experimental slices at the air. Inner Sakura sighed, reveling in the way that the bloodlust poured through her body. The adrenaline rushed through her veins, sealing away everything else until only the anger remained.

"No one cares what you say," Inner Sakura announced with a cruel smile. She brought her katana down on Kin's arm guard so hard that it cracked the metal. Blood welled up on her skin where the metal sliced her. It stained the edge of Sakura's katana, mixing with her own blood.

"It would be better if people like you **disappeared**," she hissed, pushing harder. Kin whispered as the blade of the katana dug deeper into her arm. She watched pitilessly as she sliced her sword cleanly across the skin, listening without reaction when Kin's scream of pain shattered the silent stadium.

She had known Kin: the pretty girl with an entourage of followers, as fake as her hair extensions. It was Kin who had pretended to be friends, Kin who had begged for a sleepover, Kin Sakura had found riding her father in his study. Even then, Danzou had said nothing, only smacked his hand across her face and thrown her out of the room. And Itachi, following the sound of her broken sobs, had found her slumped over on the ground. He had watched her cry wordlessly in his arms until, as if someone had thrown a switch, her sobs instantly stopped and she looked up at him with depthless, cold eyes.

Inner Sakura, Tsuchi Kin and Haruno Danzo's unintentional child, the spawn made of Sakura's hidden pain and the darkness in her heart, watched unflinchingly as blood spurted out of Kin's perfect arm.

"Disappear," Inner Sakura whispered again and Kin looked up at her with wide eyes. She clutched her bleeding arm, tears smearing her black eye make-up and took a few hurried steps away.

"YOU FREAK! STAY AWAY!" she screamed at the top of her lungs. Inner Sakura followed her in even, calm steps with the grace of a ballet dancer.

"YOU'RE THE ONE THAT SHOULD DISAPPEAR! YOU'RE SCREWED UP! YOU SHOULD DIE!" Kin shouted as she stumbled and fell on her rear, twisting her ankle. Her make-up dripped down her cheeks, making her face look rotten and gaunt. Inner Sakura smiled as she took a small step forward.

"Friends shouldn't say that to each other, Kin-chan," Inner Sakura replied in her sweetest voice as she crouched in front of the trembling girl. She reached out and scraped her blade across Kin's face, tearing the skin and mutilating her best asset. The face that had seduced the father, the face that had laughed with her at lunch: she hated it and loved it so dearly. Kin's shriek pierced her ears. And Sakura, huddled in the corner of her mind, sobbed and covered her ears as she sickening sounds of flesh being ripped apart filled her head.

"I GIVE UP!" Kin screamed out, clutching her maimed face in her shaking hands. The referee who had been anxiously hovering at the edge of the arena, rushed out, pushing Sakura away from the sobbing girl.

"Winner…Haruno… Team Suna advances!" the referee blurted out as he knelt to help Kin to her feet. Blood fell in rivers down her disfigured cheeks. The paramedics sprinted over to help her and try to stop the bleeding.

Inner Sakura felt the strength draining from her. Her fingers felt cold as she gripped her katana, its handle sticky with blood. And as Sakura took control over her body again, she felt Gaara's strong hand on her shoulder. She couldn't look him in the eyes. Instead, she pushed away his comforting touch and strode back into the waiting room. As she passed an old mirror, her face, splattered with Kin's blood, stared back at her. She closed her eyes, drew her fist back, and felt her knuckles burn as glass pierced her skin.

"Disgusting," she hissed at her distorted reflection before she made her way back up the stairs to her spot in the audience.

_"What do you want to be when you grow up, Sakura-chan?"_

_Sakura looked up from her brand-new teddy bear that Sasori had bought for her. She fiddled with the yellow ribbon around its neck, thinking. A fire crackled merrily in the hearth, filling the room with a warm, sleepy smell. A log popped in the fireplace as Sakura pondered carefully. Finally, she stood, gathering the teddy bear that was almost the same size as her, into her arms and made her way to her brother. He was sprawled lengthwise across a red armchair, his legs dangling over one of the armrests. Sakura abandoned the stuffed animal, reaching her arms up to him._

_Deidara smiled as he lifted her onto his lap. She snuggled against his warm chest, listening to the sound of his even breaths._

_"Sakura…doesn't know. What does Onii-chan want to be?" Sakura replied. He chuckled as he patted her soft hair._

_"I want to make a world where Sakura-chan can live happily, yeah," he responded. Sakura thought for a moment. She peered up into her brother's sky blue eyes. She reached up and pecked his cheek. Deidara blinked, surprised as the little girl curled back up against his chest with a little sigh._

_"Then Sakura-chan will be Onii-chan's bride," she whispered. She yawned like a little kitten, tiny and trusting before she drifted off to a peaceful slumber._

_And Deidara pressed a kiss to her forehead and held her close._

Sakura suddenly stopped on one of the cold, stone stairs. Pain stabbed through her chest as the memory hit her. She crouched down, holding on to the railing with one hand and covered her mouth with the other to muffle her sobs. Her body shook as hot tears streamed down her cheeks. A long wail left her mouth and she pressed her face against one of the stairs.

"Onii-chan! Why did you leave me?" she screamed. Her broken voice echoed off the walls, mocking her.

"I'm scared. You left me all alone. Onii-chan…" she whimpered out through the sobs shaking her shoulders.

"I'm sorry, yeah…Sakura-chan."

Sakura sucked in a shaky breath as the warm, quiet voice broke through the sound of her own weeping. She felt the presence draw closer, heard the quiet rustle of his trench coat trailing against the ground as he crouched beside her. He smelled like French cigarettes and tangy aftershave. Very slowly, gently, he drew her into his arms. She was paralyzed, falling into his comforting embrace without a sound. He pressed a soft kiss to her slightly wide forehead and inhaled quietly.

"I'm sorry," he repeated and rested his chin on top of her head.

Sakura slowly regained control of her limbs and wrapped her arms around him. She pressed her face to the familiar chest, rubbing her cheek against the fabric of his shirt just to confirm that he was real. The low rumble of his voice in his chest, the way he would always stroke her hair: this was real. He was real.

The fear that had gnawed away at her chest and the angry, acidic bite of resentment boiled furiously in her heart as she clutched at him.

"You left me all alone," she finally whispered. She wanted to hit him, to be furious at him for leaving her to deal with Danzou-sama all on her own. She wanted to hate him for making her wait. But she couldn't will her hands to let him go.

"Onii-chan..." Sakura said, her voice wavering. Deidara's arms tightened around her.

And Sakura quietly let her anger and resentment slip through her fingers like sand. She held on to her brother and let his steady, comforting aura swallow her.

* * *

Sakura didn't return to the room that night. There would be a day of recuperation for the remaining contestants so it didn't matter that she was gone. But as Gaara lay in his bed, he couldn't help but wonder where she had gone. After her match, she had been a complete mess, blood smeared across her face and hands. But it had been her eyes that had frightened him because she had obviously been more scared than anyone else. She had looked so completely lost.

Gaara rolled onto his side and watched his older brother snoring contentedly on his own bed. Kankuro had suffered some bruising but that was it. But Sakura, who had been so worried about Kankuro during the match, hadn't even shown up to check on him. With an aggravated sigh, Gaara sat up and pulled on a t-shirt and spared his brother one last glance. He sprawled across the Queen-sized bed, hogging the entire mattress. Gaara walked over to the glass door and slipped onto the balcony. His bare feet were cold against the cement but he ignored the sensation as he stared down at the street below. Most of the city was still lit up like a Christmas tree. As he listlessly watched, a black car pulled up in front of the hotel.

"What the-" Gaara blurted as he saw Sakura exit from the back. She took a few steps before a blond man in a dark coat grab her and tightly hug her. Gaara felt his insides burn as the man leaned over and kissed her cheek. Sakura spoke to him for a bit and watched him climb back into his car and drive away.

Gaara stormed back into the room, slamming the balcony door behind him. Kankuro snorted a little but didn't wake. In a fit of rage, Gaara flung himself onto the bed and threw a pillow across the room. How dare some man touch **his** girlfriend?

Gaara paused. He leaned against the headboard and stared up at the ornate ceiling.

Was Sakura his?

And the more he pondered this question, the more he realized that Sakura had never been his.

Heaving a sigh, he closed his eyes just as the door swung open and Sakura tip-toed inside. And with a pang of disappointment, Gaara listened to her curl up on the sofa to sleep. He knew that it was the logical thing for her to do. But he couldn't help but feel the cold space against his side where Sakura would have fit perfectly.

* * *

Reviews are always super-appreciated!


	11. Moronic

Goodness, yes. I'm alive. Sorry for the delay in what was supposed to be a weekly-updated story. But things have been a little crazy with school and I've been pretty sick for the last few days. Anyway, I dragged myself out of bed to finish up this last chapter. I'm so sorry to everyone I've kept waiting but I really hope all my readers will enjoy this chapter.

* * *

Black Widow

Chapter 11: Moronic

Sakura's eyes snapped open at 5:30 am. She hadn't set an alarm and there wasn't a particular noise that had woken her. Her body simply refused to rest any longer. She lay on her side, quietly contemplating her surroundings. She could hear Kankuro quietly snoring in one bed while Gaara breathed evenly in the other. There was a blanket draped over her that hadn't been there when she had curled up on the sofa the previous night.

With a quiet sigh, she sat up and raked her hands through her messy hair. Her back was sore from being squished all night. She stood and did a few stretches before tip-toeing to the bathroom to take a quick shower. Rummaging around in her suitcase, she found a long navy t-shirt and a pair of grey skinny jeans. She retreated back into the bathroom to dress and to dry her hair and apply some light make-up. She checked her phone as she looked through her suitcase for a jacket.

"Where are you going?" Gaara mumbled. His husky, sleepy voice made her freeze and turn to him. He was sitting up in bed, covers pooling around his narrow waist. His sleepy jade eyes peered out through his messy bangs: too bright, too trusting. Somehow, she felt like she had been caught doing something wrong.

Her throat felt tight as she said, "I made plans with someone," in a forcibly casual tone. Gaara pushed his hair out of his face and nodded. He blearily muttered something that sounded like, "_Iterrashai*"_ before rolling over in the covers to sleep again. Sakura gulped down a deep breath as a foreign emotion stabbed through her chest. She carefully walked over to Gaara and crouched down beside his face.

When she caught her hand reaching out to smooth back his hair, she realized with a start that she actually felt fond of him. His brow furrowed a little as he muttered something in his sleep. For a moment, she imagined dropping everything and climbing into bed with him. She knew, without a doubt, that he would pull her close, pressing his face against her damp hair. And she would curl up against his chest, warm, comfortable and safe. And for the first time in her life, she wanted something more desperately than she wanted to see her brother. While she silently battled with herself, Gaara felt her eyes on him and cracked an eye open.

"What are you doing?" he grumbled. Sakura started a little, and she quickly shook her head, as if the simple motion would get rid of her doubts. Gaara's hand peeked out of the blankets to rub at his sleepy eyes and then retreated back into the warmth. He opened his other eye too as he realized that something was wrong.

"Gaara, what would you do if I said that I didn't want to go anywhere today?" Sakura asked in a small voice. He was silent for a moment. And then, like it was the most normal thing in the world, he made a "come hither" motion. He scooted over on the bed, leaving a spot open for her. Sakura glanced down at her watch and then back at him. He arched his eyebrows.

"Don't try anything weird," she warned him as she placed her phone on the nightstand. She heard him mutter something that sounded like "as if I'd want to" as she cautiously climbed onto the bed. It was soft and still warm from Gaara's body. She stretched out with a sigh of contentment. She was so comfortable that she almost forgot that Gaara was there, less than a foot away. He snorted as he listened to her practically purr with satisfaction.

"You should get some rest. That sofa looks like it'd make a shitty bed," he commented, crossing his arms behind his head. Sakura stopped stretching. She turned on her side to look at him. He was staring up at the ceiling, eyes pointedly avoiding her. They both tensed a little when Kankuro snorted a little and mumbled "Temari, stop hitting me" in his sleep. They were completely silent as Kankuro smacked his lips, rolled over in bed and went back to snoring.

"It was. Thanks for the blanket," whispered after a moment. Gaara merely nodded. Sakura took a deep breath through her nose. The sheets were deliciously comfortable against her suddenly tired body.

"You know… you could have slept here last night if you wanted," Gaara suddenly said.

"….Because you're in love with me?" she asked with a half-smile. For the first time, Gaara looked over at her. He was completely serious, unsmiling. Sakura felt the expression fade from her lips. He watched her with an almost hungry expression, as if he was trying to pull information directly from her eyes. She was trapped in his gaze, unable to speak and unable to look away. After a minute, he heaved a sigh and then made to turn away from her. Sakura couldn't stop her arm from reaching out and tugging on his shirt.

"I'm cold," she whispered. Her own words scared her and she immediately wished that she could take them back. There had always been some sort of boundary in their relationship. They both knew that it was strictly for show, that it was only part of a bargain. But it felt like her two words had somehow crossed the line, like it was something that she shouldn't have said.

But it was true. She was cold.

And in the quiet room, as the sun began to peek over the horizon, Gaara rolled onto his side, put his arm around her waist and pulled her close. She fit perfectly against him, resting her hands against his chest like she had always belonged there. They shifted a little, Gaara stretching out his left arm so that she could used it as a pillow and Sakura pressing her cool toes against his legs for extra warmth. She pressed her ear against him, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeats. And just like she had predicted, Gaara rested his chin on top of her head. They sighed in unison.

"Are you still cold?" he asked. But Sakura had already fallen asleep again. And Gaara, knowing that he wouldn't get caught, pressed a kiss to her forehead and slept too.

Two hours later, Sakura's cell phone buzzed obnoxiously from the nightstand. Several seconds passed before either of them moved. Sakura groaned as Gaara lightly shook her awake. The annoying sound of her phone shattered what had been the best sleep she had gotten in several months. She reluctantly opened her eyes and found Gaara looking down at her with a mixture of irritation and amusement. With a sigh, she stretched out her left arm and groped for her phone. Her fingers closed around it and she flipped it open to find a text message that read "Outside." She snapped it shut and tossed it towards the foot of the bed.

Sakura automatically cuddled back up against Gaara, relishing the warmth. He chuckled, making his chest rumble.

"I have to go," she grumbled. He made a noise of assent. Still, Sakura lay still in his arms for a good five minutes until she managed to gather the will power to sit up. She immediately missed how comfortable she had felt. Gaara's arm slid from her waist and flopped down onto the bed. She glanced at him over her shoulder. His eyes were closed again. She envied his ability to go back to sleep so easily.

Sakura's entire body felt sluggish as she rolled off the bed. She slowly pulled on socks and a black leather jacket with her family's symbol, a white ring, proudly displayed on the back. Her eyes continued to drift back to Gaara's peaceful face. And each time, she was tempted to join him again. But she managed to control herself as she slung her bag over her shoulder and pulled on her favorite black boots.

She spared both her roommates another look before exiting the room. The concierge greeted her with exaggerated vigor as she strode through the lobby. Outside the hotel, a black car sat, idling. When she approached, the heavily tinted passenger side window opened and Deidara poked his head out. He peered at her over the top of his sunglasses.

"Hey, pretty miss, want a ride?" he asked with his signature smirk. Sakura cracked a smile as she pulled the door open. But as she began to climb into the car, she felt someone staring at her. She turned, scanning the front of the hotel and scrutinizing the bushes but there was nobody there.

Slowly, she lifted her head and saw the curtains in her room drawn to the side. There stood Gaara, wrapped in a light green blanket, watching her. His eyes, intense, stared down at her, searching for something. When he finally met her curious gaze, he slowly lifted his hand and waved. It was such a childish gesture, so stupid, so trivial. But Sakura couldn't stop herself from smiling a little as she wordlessly waved back.

She turned away, quickly climbing into the car.

"Who's that, yeah?" Deidara asked.

"No one," she whispered as the car pulled away from the hotel. Deidara glanced over at her but didn't comment on her obvious lie. Instead, he rolled down the windows and turned on the radio. A smooth, crooning voice flooded the car as they sped down the deserted streets. Sakura felt her hair whip around her face in wild tangles. The cool morning air kissed her cheeks as the car pulled onto the highway.

"Where are we going, Onii-chan?" Sakura asked as she watched the cramped metropolis whip past. She looked over at her brother and watched the sun glint off his long blond hair. He grinned.

"Did you have breakfast?" he asked.

"No…"

"Good! Let's eat and then I'll show you around the place, yeah!" he laughed, raising the volume and speeding down the highway. And for some reason, Sakura felt a little unsure around this person. His smile, his laugh and all his mannerisms were the same. But she couldn't feel at ease. She watched his long fingers. Even the way he tapped his silver ring against the steering wheel was the same. He felt her staring and glanced over at her, cocking an eyebrow.

"You okay?" he asked.

Sakura closed her eyes and nodded.

* * *

It became clear after lunch in one of Suna's most expensive restaurants that Deidara was well off. Rich people recognized him, business owners feared him and the women were making not-so-subtle eyes at him. They had spent the better part of the morning touring the big city, stopping by shops and shaking hands. Deidara always kept Sakura close to his side, sometimes absently petting her head like a cat. All the attention was flattering, but when he dragged her into an upscale boutique, Sakura felt her patience grow thin.

"Kana, get my sister the best dresses you have. We're going to a party tonight, yeah," Deidara instructed the store owner as he sprawled easily on a leather couch by the dressing rooms. The employees lined up by her, politely motioning for her to follow them. But Sakura stared into her brother's kind eyes and then she shook her head.

"I don't need anything, Onii-chan," she softly said, reaching into her bag for her cell phone. She flipped it open and pressed number 2 for speed-dial. As she held it up to her ear, she felt Deidara's eyes on her; not accusatory, but just confused. And like always, after two rings, he answered.

"Sakura," he whispered. His one sigh was so full of relief and exasperation that she couldn't help but feel a little guilty. She took a deep breath, searching for the right words to let him know what had happened. She wanted to apologize for leaving without telling him where she was going. She wanted to apologize for always pushing him away and then clinging to him like a child. But in the end, all she could do was close her eyes and say "Hi".

"Sasori told me that you were in Iwa for some sort of competition," Itachi finally said. Sakura made a little noise of assent. And as always, she waited for a scolding. She waited for him to finally say that he was tired of her selfish ways.

"…I was worried, Sakura," he said instead. And even though he didn't know it, his kindness pierced her like a thousand invisible knives. She exhaled noisily, pressing her free hand against her throbbing temples.

"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry," Sakura whispered. She winced as pain stabbed through her head again. It came in waves, receding for a moment before pounding into her again. Her wince didn't go unnoticed.

"Sakura, are you still feeling ill?" Itachi demanded at the same time that Deidara took her hand the pulled her to sit down beside him. His big hands touched her cheeks, her forehead. He peered into her eyes, like he would be able to find the problem there.

"I'm fine. Anyway, I need you to send someone over with a dress," she snapped as she pulled out of her brother's reach. When she glanced over, she saw Deidara's sky blue eyes, startled.

And then she saw what was making her feel so uneasy.

The "Onii-chan" in her memories had never been startled or flustered. He had always been so tall, reliable, and perfect. He was always kind, always knew what to say. And this person in front of her, even though he looked just like him, wasn't the "Onii-chan" that she had always imagined. As she stared into her brother's loving face, she had the strangest impulse to claw her nails across his skin. Instead, she let Itachi's voice wash over her and held back the tears that threatened to spill out.

Thanks to Itachi's connections, a dress was delivered within a few hours. Deidara took them to one of his apartments where Sakura changed into the shimmering black piece and had her hair done by his personal stylist. She did her own make-up though: smoky eyeliner, bright red lips and a dab of mascara. The face staring back at her from the mirror sneered. It was Inner Sakura, not her, who was reflected. They had a simple dinner prepared by his personal chef and then Deidara drove them downtown. This part of the city was illuminated by neon lights and blinking billboards that advertised sex, food and music. They pulled up in front of a building with the words "Aurora Blue" glowing above the front door. A valet parked their car, pausing to bow nervously to Deidara. The bouncers wordlessly parted as they sailed past the long line of people waiting to enter. Inside, the DJ spun music that made the floors tremble. Bodies writhed together on the dance floor. Cocktails and beer flowed from the bar. The women wearing low-cut dresses and criminally short skirts laughed, throwing their heads back and rubbing up against the men.

Deidara shouted over the music to greet friends as he led Sakura through the crowd. Eventually, they came to a flight of metal stairs that led up to a second floor. The bouncers guarding it bowed respectfully as Deidara passed. Sakura silently followed her brother's lead as he climbed up the stairs. They led up to a balcony where a few people were lounging on the leather seats. The people quickly stood to greet Deidara, the women fluttering their eyelashes as they spoke. But Deidara's eyes never strayed to them once, keeping his arm around Sakura's shoulders. They sat on a black sofa and drinks were immediately offered.

"And one for you, miss?" someone asked as they offered a glass filled with a fizzy orange liquid. Deidara made to refuse it, but Sakura accepted with a faint smile. She lifted the glass to her nose, seemingly taking in the fruity smell. After a moment, she dipped her pinky into the drink and placed it against the tip of her tongue.

"It's clean," Sakura declared after a moment and then took a sip. She glanced over at Deidara and lifted her glass towards him in a mock toast. She quickly finished the drink and it was whisked away, almost immediately replaced by another. With a little bit of alcohol in her, Sakura felt relaxed. Deidara chatted with his associates, occasionally stroking Sakura's hair. The dull pounding of the music downstairs sent faint tremors through her bones as she settled comfortably in her seat.

A few hours passed and Sakura grew bored. She took note of the faces that came to visit, some vaguely familiar and some that paused, surprised, to greet her. It was evident that Deidara had friends in high places. But in the middle of the "friendly talks", Deidara suddenly tensed. Sakura, who had been curled up against Deidara's side, glanced over at the metal stairs that led up to their VIP balcony. She closed her eyes and felt the weak chakra from the bouncers downstairs. There was a small flicker from one of the signatures. She immediately tensed, her fingers digging into Deidara's arm. After a moment, she began to pull away from his side. But Deidara noticed, automatically tightening his hold on her as he looked down at her troubled expression.

As he watched, the silver earring in her right ear glinted in the dim, pulsing lights in the nightclub. It was a flat disk with a black spider etched in the center. The red mark on its back seemed to glow menacingly. He slowly let his hold slacken and Sakura leaned back in her seat, crossing one leg over the other. She picked up her glass to sniff the contents before taking a sip.

And then, under the pounding of the bass, there were footsteps. Sakura let her chakra flare a little, warning the intruder. Much to her relief, the chakra that responded was familiar. It was Sasori that climbed the stairs, his sleepy eyes a dazzling array of colors in the club's multicolored lights. He scanned the area, his expression calming when he found Sakura. He quickened his pace, skipping the last few steps to stride up to her. He leaned over to press a light kiss to her cheek. He breathed a quiet sigh of relief against her ear.

"Hime," he finally said with an irritated frown. He belatedly noticed Deidara and politely inclined his head. Sakura patted the empty spot beside her with a "sit, please". Sasori complied, his eyes darting back to the stairs.

"So?" she prompted as she lifted her glass to her lips again. Sasori quickly glanced around and then leaned forward to speak so that no one else could hear.

"We've found Orochimaru's headquarters, Hime," he murmured. Sakura's fingers tightened around the glass. The stem snapped off, falling onto the floor. A staff member was immediately on the scene, gathering up the pieces and apologizing for the mess. Sakura barely noticed as the drink was taken away and replaced with a new one. Her eyes narrowed as she processed the information.

"Are we going to take vengeance for your father's death, Hime? After all, isn't is obvious that it was Orochimaru controlling Kabuto?" Sasori inquired when she didn't comment. Very slowly, Sakura grasped the lapels of his black jacket and drew him even closer. She could feel his stubble rub against her cheek as she opened her mouth and whispered "No. Bring me Itachi." She released him and Sasori didn't even bother to feign surprise as he saw her irritated expression.

"Sasori, I've known Itachi for 11 years. I'd know his chakra anywhere. Send him up," she scoffed with a smirk. Sasori pecked the top of her head and hurried down the stairs. Sakura saw Deidara's frown out of the corner of her eye.

"You're still working with those guys?" Deidara demanded, his steely blue eyes disapproving. Her lips quirked up in a humorless smile at her brother's irritation.

"No. They work for me now," she replied as Itachi climbed the stairs in his usual unhurried pace. Like Sasori, he was wearing a black suit with a black shirt and a red necktie. He completely ignored Deidara as he walked over and kissed her forehead. He sat in the space that Sasori had previously occupied without being asked.

"Do you want a drink?" she asked as she motioned at her own fruity cocktail. Itachi's mouth pulled down in a frown.

"You're not legal, Hime," he reminded her.

"Neither is my business. Whiskey?" Sakura said and watched him reluctantly nod. She snapped at one of the nearby staff members and he hurried off to complete the order.

"So…What's Sakura up to?" Itachi casually asked as his drink was placed on the glass coffee table. Deidara's eyes widened and he abruptly stopped in the middle of a conversation to turn to his left. Sakura's mouth was curled up into a cruel sneer as she traced her fingers around the rim of her glass.

"Sleeping," she replied.

"For how long?" Itachi demanded.

"Hm… since your phone call? She hasn't been feeling very well anyway," Sakura responded. She barely even noticed when Deidara grabbed her shoulder.

"What the hell are you two talking about, yeah?" Deidara growled. He glanced over at Sakura and was completely sure that it was her chakra he sensed. Her face looked no different, even if her expression was a little distant. Slowly, Sakura looked over at her brother and her upper lip curled.

"Don't touch me," she snapped, shaking his hand off her. Itachi stared at Deidara over Sakura's hand and a silent agreement passed between them. Itachi offered Sakura his hand and she accepted without hesitation.

"We should go, Hime," he whispered. Inner Sakura's cold eyes appraised Deidara and then turned back to Itachi.

"Ah, he's curious. That's fine then," she replied and sauntered off downstairs.

Inside her head, Sakura watched her body weave through the crowd and emerge outside. The evening air smelled like cigarettes and incense. Inner Sakura noticed Sasori waiting by a black car parked across the street. The tip of his cigarette glowed as he glanced up at her.

"Hey… are you awake?" Inner Sakura wondered as she crossed the street. From inside, Sakura nodded, uncurling herself from the fetal position. Inner Sakura climbed into the car and paused to greet Kisame who was sitting in the driver's seat. He turned the radio off, and muttered something as Sasori climbed into the passenger's seat.

"Have you been following me?" Inner Sakura inquired. Her soft voice cut through the quiet air in the car.

"No, Hime. We only arrived a few minutes ago. Itachi suspected that you would need us," Sasori finally replied. And Inner Sakura made a faint noise of assent before settling back into silence. A few moments passed and Itachi quickly sat beside Sakura before slamming the door shut. The faint sounds of Deidara starting his car behind them reached their ears.

"Follow him, Kisame," Itachi softly instructed as Deidara's car sped past them. And as Kisame drove them through the dark streets, Itachi pulled Sakura to his side.

"I'm not her, you know," Inner Sakura reminded him. Itachi's crimson eyes stared out the window.

"I am well aware of that. Go get her for me," he replied. And Inner Sakura closed her eyes, rested her head on his shoulder and went to sleep.

As soon as her body's eyes closed, Sakura found herself face-to-face with Inner Sakura. They silently appraised each other before Inner Sakura spoke.

"I hate him," Inner Sakura sighed. Sakura almost smiled.

"Onii-chan?" she asked.

"Yeah. Fucking abandons you and then comes back like some fucking Prince Charming. What an asshole," spat Inner Sakura and Sakura chuckled. They lapsed back into silence, Sakura's laughter quickly fading. They both knew what was going to happen.

"They need you, not me, Sakura. You've got to wake up," Inner Sakura quietly said as she sat down next to her counterpart. It was quiet as they both thought.

"You're the one that can kill. I can't handle that stuff. I'm no good," Sakura finally admitted. Inner Sakura stunned her by wheeling around and backhanding her across the face. It didn't hurt, of course, but the action still surprised her. Inner Sakura was violent but never without reason. And as she pressed her hand against her warm cheek, Sakura watched Inner Sakura rake her hands through her short hair and begin to cry.

"Don't you get it?" Inner Sakura shouted. Sakura, still half-stunned by the blow just gaped at her. Inner Sakura stomped over and sat in front of her. She grabbed Sakura's hand and pressed it up against her chest. It was cold and still, no heartbeat and no breathing.

"You are me, Sakura. But I'll never be you. I'm not REAL," Inner Sakura half-shouted, her eyes filling with tears again. She grabbed Sakura's shoulders and shook her a little.

"I can NEVER replace you!"

"YES YOU CAN! YOU CAN! YOU SHOULD!" Sakura screamed back, shoving Inner Sakura away. She clawed her nails across her own face, letting out a yell of frustration. When she opened her eyes, Inner Sakura was glaring at her.

"Don't look at me like that. You LIKE to kill people. You LOVE to slice them open. Just look at Kin!" Sakura spat. Inner Sakura's face turned white. Sakura tensed, waiting for Inner Sakura to attack again. But Inner Sakura just let out a tired sigh. She ruffled her short hair, making it stick up in the back.

"You and I both know that's not true. Tell me, Sakura. Why am I here?" Inner Sakura quietly asked. Sakura's eyes narrowed as she lowered her hands.

"Because I can't-"

"No, Sakura. Not because you can't. Because you won't," Inner Sakura interrupted with a frown. Sakura's eyes widened.

"I know you better than anyone because I am you. I get it. You were scared, alone. You didn't want to deal with such a scary world without Onii-chan. I get it. But you're not 6 anymore," said Inner Sakura as she walked over to her counterpart. Sakura grabbed Inner Sakura's hand. She couldn't stop shaking, as if she were shivering, but there was no cold.

"Up until now, I've dealt with all those assassinations and missions and I pretended to love it so that you could hate me. That way, I could protect you from me. But you can't keep running away, Sakura. The headaches are getting worse and I'm taking over way too often. I might steal this body away from you someday," Inner Sakura whispered as she knelt beside her. Sakura buried her face in her hands. She wanted desperately to cry but no tears were coming out.

"I need you! I can't do this alone!" she wailed. Inner Sakura threw her arms around her in a tight hug. Sakura grabbed onto her, afraid that she would slip away if she wasn't holding on enough.

"You don't need me. And I can never replace you. That's why… I'm telling you… wake up. We're almost there," Inner Sakura murmured. Sakura looked up and saw Inner Sakura's face, her own face, dissolving. Through the fading celadon of her eyes, she saw red. Slowly, she forced herself to focus, and she saw thick eyelashes, three black commas.

"Sakura, we're almost at Deidara's apartment. Wake up," Itachi said, shaking her arm. Sakura, dazed, blinked once, twice. She saw the city, glittering and sparkling with traffic lights and the neon signs on buildings that whizzed past. Every once in a while, they would pass under a streetlight and Itachi's necklace would sparkle. His eyes were tense, tired. She heard Sasori murmur quietly to Kisame who snorted. And for the first time in a long, long time, the inside of her mind was quiet.

"How long was I out?" she asked over Sasori's low voice.

"An hour. What did she say?" Itachi said, his hand stoking her long hair.

"Who?" Sakura retorted, closing her eyes again. And she listened to Itachi's quiet sigh that meant that he had given up. Kisame belched loudly and Sasori scoffed under his breath. The car's engine hummed soothingly in the background.

"Nii-san," she softly said. And even though she couldn't see him, she knew he was listening.

"Call him and tell him that I'm tired and that I have a competition tomorrow," she ordered.

"He's not going to be happy, Hime," Sasori commented from the front and Kisame chortled, evidently in agreement. Still, Itachi obediently dialed his phone and waited.

"What?" she heard Deidara bark.

"Our Hime says that she is very tired. She has her competition tomorrow so we're going to be heading back and dropping her off at the hotel. I'll explain things to you tomorrow," Itachi said. Sakura heard Kisame laugh as Deidara spluttered a string of curse words.

"I deserve an explanation! Let me talk to her!" he roared. Sakura opened her eyes as Itachi held out the phone to her with a bemused expression. She closed her eyes again and repeated, "I'm tired."

"She says to shove it up your ass. Good night," Itachi snapped before sliding his phone shut and putting it back in his pocket. Kisame continued to roar with laughter as she jerked the car around in a U-turn and began driving back to the hotel.

"He'll probably drink himself to sleep while crying, Hime," Sasori commented dryly. But Sakura had already fallen back asleep.

* * *

Gaara was woken by something in the room smelling like cigarettes and booze. He blearily opened one eye and saw a dark blur moving past him. It sighed and he immediately knew who it was. When he heard fabric rustling, he closed his eye and again and gave her some privacy. He listened to her walk to the bathroom and shut the door. He fell back asleep to the sound of water splashing out of the shower head.

"Gaara. Sorry, but can you scoot over?" he felt Sakura whisper against his ear. Barely conscious, he slid away from the edge of the bed, leaving a warm spot open for her. She smelled so clean and- was delicious the right word? She smelled good. He waited as she climbed into the bed and comfortably arranged the covers over herself before he spoke.

"You okay?" he mumbled.

"Yeah. But I'm a little cold," she replied. Like it was the most natural thing, he reached for her in the dark and found her hand. He pulled her close, wrapping both his arms around her. She sighed against his chest. And even though he knew that something was clearly wrong, he knew that all he could do was hold her. So he did.

And Sakura slept soundly that night.

* * *

*Itterasshai- rougly translates to something like "have a safe trip" or "have a nice day". It's something that people commonly say to someone leaving for work or school at the beginning of the day. In other words, it's something very familiar and intimate for Sakura to hear from Gaara.

Review please!


	12. Insecure

Merry Belated Christmas to everyone! Is it bad that writing this chapter really hurt? Uh.. yeah... advanced warning: major angsting in this chapter. But, you do get the full story on Sakura's past so I guess it's not all bad. It's super long because... I couldn't stop myself from typing...OTL

Anyway, I keep forgetting to mention this, but I want to give a shout-out to:

**SasoLOVE111** and **miikodesu** who have reviewed on pretty much every chapter. Your reviews always made me smile and sometimes they even inspired me to add certain things. Thanks for your continued support and input!

I feel terrible that the final round of the tournament hasn't started yet, but this chapter would legitimately be 20 pages long if I added that in, so I'll save it for next chapter.

Enjoy!

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 12: Insecure

"Tell me you used protection!"

Sakura groaned as Kankuro's laughing voice pierced through her dream. She half-heartedly raised her arm to swat at him but he only laughed harder. Something went sailing over her head and Kankuro let out a muffled "ouch". She forced one eye open and found Kankuro lying on the floor with a pillow on his face. And Gaara, pillow-less, cuddled up against her back and wrapped his arms around her waist.

"Morning," he mumbled. His warm breath ghosted over the back of her neck, making cheeks go warm.

"What time is it?" she asked as Kankuro sat up. Gaara resisted a little but eventually his hands fell away, flopping uselessly onto the bed. Kankuro tossed the offending pillow onto his messy bed with a grin.

"It's time to eat breakfast. Rise and shine, baby brother!" Kankuro sang as he pounced on top of Gaara. Sakura rolled off the bed just in time to see Kankuro grab his brother in a headlock. Gaara barely opened his eyes as elbowed him in the stomach, but was unable to break free. They wrestled for a minute until Gaara managed to push Kankuro the edge of the bed and throw him to the floor.

"I love you too, baby brother," Kankuro grumbled, rubbing his arm. Gaara buried his head under the sheets, pausing to give him the middle finger.

"It's almost ten," Sakura observed as she retrieved her phone from the nightstand. She skimmed through the text messages and phone calls she had missed during the night. There were six missed calls from her brother alone. There was also a voicemail that Sakura highly suspected would be from him too. With a sigh, she set her phone back on the nightstand and stood. She stretched her arms and legs, listening to the joints pop back into place. When she glanced over her shoulder, Gaara was slowly arranging himself in a sitting position. She couldn't help that her gaze lingered on his six-pack and the way his muscular arms flexed as he moved. His sleepy eyes looked up at her and he cracked a smile before Kankuro suddenly tackled him from behind.

"I'm taking a shower," she announced, rolling her eyes as the brothers fell to the ground and continued abusing one another. They didn't notice her grab her cell phone along with her toiletries before she slipped into the bathroom. She locked the door behind her and flipped the phone open.

_Sakura-chan, what's going on? I'm worried about you._

_-D_

Sakura skimmed through a few more messages until she found one from Itachi about three hours later.

_We'll be at your match today. Be careful._

_-I_

She scowled. Itachi would be paranoid enough to do something like that. She half-considered calling him to tell him not to show up. Just as she started to ask Inner Sakura what she thought, the previous night's memories came flooding back. The cold, emptiness inside her head made her ears ring. The space, where Inner Sakura's caustic remarks and snide commentary normally resided, was completely silent. She felt naked without Inner Sakura there to sigh angrily and offer to take over when things got too tough.

"Hey, Sakura! Hurry up! I've got to take a dump!" Kankuro shouted through the door.

"You're fucking disgusting," Gaara snorted. Sakura rolled her eyes as she heard Kankuro's growl and the loud thump that followed. Still, she smiled a little. Despite their cursing and roughhousing, the brothers really did love each other. She shed her clothing, folding each piece neatly and stacking them on top of each other. Crossing the bathroom in a few steps, she fiddled with the knob in the shower until the water came out at the perfect temperature: balancing perfectly between warm enough and scalding hot. As she stepped under the hot spray, she heard Kankuro's boisterous laugh.

She glanced down as the soothing rhythm of water massaged her tense shoulders. She watched the water bounce off the tiles before swirling down the drain. Her hair was dark, almost red, sticking to her shoulders and back. After a quick rinse with shampoo and lavender-scented body wash, she stood under the falling water, letting her mind go numb. She stood, completely motionless, with her eyes closed and palms pressed to her ears.

"Sakura, I seriously need to GO," Kankuro whined, knocking the door again.

Sakura stared at the wall in front of her. Kankuro cursed, wondering out loud if the people next door would let him use the bathroom. She mechanically turned the water off, listening to water drip off of her hair. The sound echoed eerily, mixing with the low drone of the ventilation fan. Slowly, she groped in the steam for her towel and dried herself off. She patted her long hair dry, wincing as some of the strands tangled around her fingers. Her quiet sigh bounced off the tiled walls, making her temples throb.

"Hey, you okay in there?" Gaara called. Sakura hurriedly pulled on her clothes.

"Sakura?"

"I'll be out in a minute," she snapped back as she quickly gathered her things. As she passed the sink, she caught a glimpse of her face. And for the first time, she noticed that there were tears streaming down her cheeks. She rubbed them away with a quick swipe of her hand. After a deep breath, she pulled up the vestiges of Inner Sakura's presence up: her strength, her ability to smile when she felt like crying, and her ability to smile even though her heart was screaming out in pain.

It was like slipping on the white porcelain mask she had used during missions for Danzo. Her body knew what to do. Lips pulled up into an easy smile while shoulders relaxed. With a giant hole punched through her chest, Sakura held her head high and exited the bathroom. When she re-entered the room, Gaara had Kankuro in a headlock.

"Thank you, Buddha!" Kankuro blurted out when he spotted her. Gaara quickly released his brother and they both watched the puppeteer scramble to his feet and launch his body into the bathroom.

"What's wrong?" Gaara demanded as soon as the door shut. He stared up at Sakura as he sat cross-legged on the ground. Sakura felt her shoulders automatically stiffen a little. She quickly recovered her nonchalant smile as she stepped over him to sit on the edge of the bed. Her fingers combed through her damp hair, patiently untwisting and untangling. Gaara's accusatory silence stretched out, pricking her in the back like a thousand needles. Still, Sakura slowly finished tying her long hair back in a loose ponytail, ignoring him.

"Haruno," Gaara began in a tone that made her jaw clench. She stood, brushing imaginary dust off the back of her red miniskirt. She averted her eyes from him, instead focusing on the wooden bench neatly pushed up against the vanity. Her back was turned to Gaara as she sat on it. The polished wood creaked slightly. She clearly heard him stand. The grey carpet made a soft rustling noise against the fabric of his black pants. His muted footsteps drew closer, big and confident.

"You were talking in your sleep, you know," he began in an unusually quiet voice.

Sakura closed her eyes as she massaged foundation into her forehead and cheeks. The light scent of the perfume brought back memories of Inner Sakura's hard gaze; it had echoed strength and confidence as she sat applying make-up before the nightly assignments. But when she opened her eyes, her tired reflection was looking back at her. For an instant, she thought she saw a flicker of that old strength and her eyes widened. Over her shoulder, she saw Gaara's furrowed brow, the way his mouth turned down at the corners.

"You begged someone not to go," Gaara continued. He hesitated for a moment and then sat on the bench beside her, facing the opposite direction. His shaggy hair fell into his face, nearly sweeping his pointed chin. The dark crimson tattoo on his forehead peeked out with slices of pale skin.

Sakura forced her hand to stay steady as she traced the curve of her upper eyelid with eyeliner. She repeated the process with the other eye, careful that the dark lines swept out just a little past the edge of her eyelid. She blinked a few times, mentally measuring to see if both sides were even. When she was satisfied, she rummaged around in her make-up bag for her favorite lipstick. The cap popped off easily. She twisted the bottom, watching the scarlet color rise to the perfect height. She leaned forward to get a better look at herself.

"Haruno."

Sakura froze with her lipstick just a few centimeters from her mouth. The corners of her lips curled up into a humorless smile. She glanced over at him for a moment and then returned her attention to her reflection.

"What?" she inquired.

"You know **what**," he snapped, crossing his arms over his chest. Sakura ignored him as she carefully applied a coat of bright red over her mouth. She puckered her lips once and then smacked them together. After checking herself from a few different angles, she capped the lipstick and stuck it back in her bag. She pressed her palms against the vanity, getting ready to stand, but Gaara's hand locked around her wrist.

"What the…" Sakura began protesting, but she trailed off when she saw Gaara's rigid expression. He looked like a man preparing himself for his own execution. A quiet sigh escaped her as she sat back down. She curled up her legs, hugging them against her chest and stared at the mirror. The back of Gaara's head, the same shade of blazing crimson that she remembered, was still. But his fingers were still wrapped around her, enough to hurt a little. But she didn't say anything because she knew that she was about to hurt him even more.

She hadn't wanted to do things like this.

"Tell me everything. Tell me who the hell you are. I'm tired of all this bullshit," he quietly said. His voice was low and even but that scared her a little. She had been expecting his anger, his usual temper to flare up. That was Gaara: passion and impulses. His composure made her heart clench tight in her chest, preparing for the worst.

She felt his icy eyes following her every move as she plucked her phone from her pocket. She flipped it open, pressed #4 for speed-dial and waited.

"Hime?" Sasori immediately answered.

"Is my room bugged?" she inquired without the usual playful banter. Sasori hesitated.

"I know you've been in here already. Did you plant some of your own?" Sakura pressed. She paused to stare at the hand still caught in Gaara's tight grip. He noticed and slowly let his fingers relax. Frowning, she flexed her fingers. Her hand tingled as the blood rushed back in all at once.

Sasori exhaled noisily, making the phone crackle. "No, Hime. I only sent Kisame to check your room. We haven't left anything behind," he admitted.

"Good," said Sakura and then snapped the phone shut. She took another deep breath, trying to anchor herself to something. She needed to focus, to be calm. Gaara made a noise in the back of his throat; it was a cross between a fake cough and a growl. Sakura clenched her hands together, the nails digging into her skin.

"What do you want to hear?" she finally asked. It was quiet as she waited. Kankuro let out a sigh of satisfaction and hummed off-key. People chattered happily as they passed the room. Someone laughed loudly and the sound pierced through the walls. The noise seemed almost abrasive in contrast to the quiet room. Sakura's shoulders tensed as she felt Gaara's hand press against her bare arm.

"Sakura," Gaara uttered. Sakura barely had time to register that for the first time, Gaara had called her first name. He wrapped his big hand around hers, pulling her to her feet. He marched over to the bathroom and without knocking, opened the door. Kankuro, who had been washing his hands in the sink, gaped at them.

"What the hell, Gaara?" the puppeteer demanded, raising an eyebrow. Gaara made some sort of vague expression, jerking his chin towards the room. Kankuro, forehead furrowed and lips puckered, seemed to think this over. His face lit up as he flashed his brother a thumbs-up.

"You kids act responsible," he teased as he scooped up his jacket from his suitcase and headed for the exit. Sakura, who wasn't exactly in the mood for jokes, stared blankly at him. Kankuro coughed once and, giving his brother a mock-salute, quickly exited the room. As soon as the door swung shut, Gaara turned all three locks. Sakura twisted her hands in his grip. His hold had grown uncomfortably tight again and she wasn't in the mood to use force to break free. Gaara glanced back at their joined hands, his face strangely empty.

"Do you even know what you're doing?" Sakura finally asked with a weary laugh. Gaara's gaze drifted up to her face. He shrugged.

"No," he relented, averting his eyes. Something about his vulnerable expression made her teeth clench. It felt like a knife was being twisted straight into her chest. He must have noticed because he reached out to her with his free hand.

"Sit. I'll talk," Sakura quickly said, turning away from him. And she felt Gaara's fingers pull on hers as she drifted away. But after a second, his grip slipped and her hand felt unexpectedly cold. She sat on the bed they had shared the night before, still not looking at him. She sat, dangling her toes over the edge. The mattress dipped as Gaara sat on the other side. She expected him to at least sit next to her. But his back, muscular and warm, pressed against hers. He sighed and some of the tension left him.

Sakura stared down at her knees, tracing random patterns over the fabric of her skirt.

"I was born March 28 at Konohagakure University Hospital. My mother's name was Imamura Aiko. She was just 20 at the time. She was studying to be a veterinarian at Konohagakure University," she finally said. Her tone was dispassionate, detached, almost as if she was talking about a stranger's life story. Gaara was still against her back, only moving to breathe.

"Aiko raised me until I was almost five. But she was depressed, maybe even schizophrenic. She tried to drown me in a bathtub, to abandon me at the mall and even to starve me. But she would stop just before. You see, sometimes, she was really loving and fun. But she would have these episodes. She would tell me that I had ruined her life and that I was the reason why **he** didn't love her anymore. I loved my mother as much as I was terrified of her. Just a few days after my fourth birthday, she hung herself."

Sakura clenched her hands into the sheets, trying to hold back the bitterness that threatened to spill out of her chest. All of the days spent trying to get her mother to leave her bed, the moments of terror where her mother would hold her hand above her head, ready to strike. But it was her mother's tears that frightened her the most: unpredictable and unending. The bottles of pills her mother tried were always cluttering the kitchen counter. And the rare moments where her mother was smiling, where she would hold her close and call her "my beautiful flower" hurt her the most. It would have been easier if her mother had been a terrible, evil woman. But Aiko had merely been broken and in all her brokenness, she had loved her daughter as best as she could have.

One morning, Sakura had woken to completely silence. She had peeked into her mother's bedroom and only found photos of a man with dark hair and dark eyes. There were dozens of them, littered across her mother's cold futon. And even though she had been too young to understand suicide and death, something icy had taken hold of her heart. She had run through the small apartment, screaming for her mother. And in the living room, above a chair that had been knocked sideways, she had seen her mother's body dangling. The toes were purple and cold. There had been no response.

"Two days later, men dressed in black suits broke into our apartment. They found me hiding in the bathtub. They told me that my father had sent them. I was taken to his house- actually, it's my house now. When I entered his study, all I could see were his cold, cold eyes."

Sakura paused to look up at the ceiling. Her head rested against the dip between Gaara's shoulder blades. A sad smile touched her lips.

"You know, I had always imagined my father to be a loving person. Maybe he was a king of a foreign country. And one day, he would send for mother and me and we would all live together in his castle. Well, he had finally sent for me. And you know what he said to me? The first words he said to me?"

"_Your mother is dead," Danzo said. His voice was as frigid as his eyes were. He folded his hands on top of his desk, watching her. Sakura, clutching at the folds of her wrinkled skirt, stared blankly up at him._

"_Dead?" she repeated. Her bright eyes, the same color her mother's had been, were wide. She didn't like this man. She wanted to go back home. Maybe, mother had climbed down from the ceiling and was making breakfast. Maybe, it would be a good day and mother would take her to the park to play._

"_She won't wake up again. You're going to live here from now on," Danzo explained as he stood. He motioned towards one of the men standing by his desk and he stepped forward with a coat. Danzo shrugged it on as he walked to the door. Sakura stared down at the floor, listening to the sharp snap of his shoes against the polished hardwood. She squeezed her eyes shut, dredging up the courage to speak._

"_Are you… my father?"she squeaked. His footsteps stopped._

"_You will refer to me as Danzo-sama from now on," he simply replied as he strode out of the room. The tall men that had been standing near him followed. The door slammed shut behind him, leaving her alone in the dark room. There was a fire crackling in the fireplace, but it seemed frightening instead of comforting. _

_She was cold. She was hungry. And she was all alone. Her knees buckled and she fell to the hard floor. As she took a big breath, her chest ached. A choked noise escaped her mouth. Tears fell from her eyes, landing on her hands and the pretty blue skirt her mother had liked. She pressed her cheek against the floor as sobs shook her body. She wrapped her arms around herself, trying to remembering the few times her mother had hugged her. _

_The door swung open and a narrow slice of light spilled onto the floor. There were slow, quiet footsteps. _

"_Are you Sakura-chan, yeah?" a voice asked. It wasn't as deep as Danzo-sama's voice had been. Sakura trembled as a warm hand touched the top of her dirty hair. She shrank away from it. To her surprise, it reached for her again. _

"_Sakura-chan. Come here. I'm your onii-chan, yeah. I won't hurt you," he coaxed. And unlike all the times her mother had roughly yanked her to her feet and yelled at her for embarrassing her, his hands were gentle. He pulled her into a sitting position. In the dim light, she could make out eyes the color of the sky. He reached into his pocket, pulling out a white handkerchief. He carefully wiped the tears from her cheeks, even helping her blow her nose. After surveying her for a moment, he looked over his shoulder._

"_Oi, go get something for Sakura-chan to eat," he ordered and someone immediately ran off. Sakura hiccupped, trying to stop herself from crying. But her chest hurt so much, like it was being ripped apart. She clenched her hands to the place her heart was, like she could grab what was hurting. _

"_Poor kid. You must be freezing, yeah," he murmured as he wiped her tears with his fingers. _

"_What kind of mom leaves her kid behind like that?" someone else muttered. _

"_N-n-no. It's be-because Sakura w-was b-ba-bad!" Sakura managed to say before another sob erupted from her chest. She clenched her fingers into the fabric of her shirt because she had nothing left to hold on to. _

"_Sasori-danna, look! You made her cry even more!" he complained. He cupped her face in his hands, tilting her head up to look at him. The door opened wider and the light in the hallway flooded the room. She could see that he had hair that was gold like the sun. He smiled, wiping her cheeks with his thumbs. _

"_Sakura-chan, don't cry. I'm Deidara and I'll protect you from now on," he announced. A woman appeared behind him. There was a strange piece of metal in her lower lip. For some reason, Sakura could smell roses as the woman crouched beside Deidara. Her purple hair fell into her eyes as she lightly touched Sakura's forehead._

"_Are you cold?" she asked. Sakura slowly nodded. Deidara shrugged off his black jacket and wrapped it around her. Then, after he whispered something to the woman, he lifted Sakura into his arms. He smelled like something smoky and bitter but at the same time, it was comforting. She rested her head against his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heart. As he carried her into the hallway, she saw that there were several adults waiting outside. Sakura hiccupped again. She felt too tired to really cry anymore. Deidara's strong arms tightened around her. He glanced down at her to smile again._

"_Welcome home, yeah," he whispered._

"Iwa no Deidara: My half-brother. We had the same father, but his mother had been our father's first wife. He was sixteen years older than me. And even though Danzo-sama became my legal guardian, it was my onii-chan who really took care of me," Sakura whispered. It was so quiet in the room that it felt wrong to be speaking. But when she felt Gaara's fingers lace through hers, she knew that she had to continue speaking.

"He was always there for me. He told me that his life goal was to create a world where I was happy. And I was happy. As long as onii-chan was with me, I wasn't afraid. But…"

"_Did you have fun today, Sakura-chan?" Deidara whispered as he smoothed her hair back. Sakura snuggled deeper under the covers, nodding sleepily. He kissed her forehead and tucked her favorite teddy bear, the one Sasori had bought for her, under her arm. It was what he did every night before bed time. But for some reason, his face looked a little different. _

"_Onii-chan?" Sakura said. Deidara's eyes drifted down to her. She felt like he wasn't really seeing her, even though he was right there. She reached out her hand and he took it in his own. His fingers were big and strong. _

"_I love you, Onii-chan," she said. Even though it had been over a year ago, she felt the same way she had the morning she had woken up and found her mother hanging from the ceiling. But she didn't know what to say or how to make things better. She stared up at his loving face and her chest hurt again._

"_Love you too, Sakura-chan. Sweet dreams, yeah," Deidara replied. He released her hand and stood. For a moment, he looked down at her and he looked so terribly sad that Sakura thought he might cry. But then he put on his usual smile, patted her head one last time and left. _

_Sakura stared up at the ceiling, trying her best to figure out what felt so wrong. After a morning in the park, they had eaten lunch, watched a movie and had cake and hot chocolate before bed. But she was too tired to keep her eyes open for very long. As her eyes slid shut and sleep beckoned, she felt something nag at the very edges of her mind. She reached up, and touched her very first Christmas present. Deidara's ornate lighter hung from a long chain around her neck. She clutched it tightly in her hands, curling up on her side._

_And for the first time, she realized that her brother hadn't said "see you tomorrow, Sakura-chan" before bed._

"And when I woke up, he was just gone."

Sakura felt Gaara shaking and she stopped. She twisted around and saw that he was hunched over, his head bowed. His jaw was locked, his eyes glaring holes into the carpet. For a moment, her heart ached for him. She had read his files and she knew that his uncle, the one who had raised him from birth, had tried to assassinate him. The anguish rolled off of him like tangible waves. At the very least, her love hadn't been reciprocated with a lie. Gaara had been betrayed in the cruelest way possible.

"Gaara," she sighed. She tried shaking his shoulder but he didn't say anything. Slowly, he turned his head to look up at her and the pain in his gaze made her choke back any words she had thought about saying.

"People….should **never** abandon their families," he hissed through gritted teeth. He took a shuddering breath, like he was trying to stop himself from crying. Sakura stared at him. It struck her that there was something so incredibly intimate about what he was showing her. Sabaku no Gaara: the famed Sandman who was rumored to have killed ten men with his bare hands. And here he was: Sabaku no Gaara, man-no, boy, incredibly vulnerable and weak.

And then, she saw that his strength wasn't any form of violence. It was his pain manifested in a form that he could handle. Inner Sakura had been hers. Gaara didn't fight because he wanted to. He did it so he could deal with his suffering and his fears. It was the only way he knew how to cope.

Sakura felt tears welling up in her eyes. She knew what he needed to hear from her. She knew exactly how to make him feel better. But the words weighed in her chest like lead and she couldn't make her mouth form the sounds.

"_I love you, Gaara. I'm in love with you. So don't feel hurt anymore. Don't feel scared. I love you."_

Instead, she wrapped her arms around his waist, pressing herself against his back. She didn't know what sort of things to say to comfort him. After all, her mother had never done that sort of thing for her and her father had hardly been the nurturing type. All she could do was close her eyes, press her cheek against his back and feel his pain.

"It crushed me. My beloved onii-chan was gone. Danzo-sama's agents searched for him but there was no trace. But I wasn't completely alone."

Gaara gradually stopped shaking. His muscles were still tense and he didn't move, but she could feel his shallow breaths slowly even out.

"My father was the boss of a gang called ANBU. He-"

To her surprise, Gaara's head shot up, nearly knocking into hers. He twisted in her arms to fix her with a skeptical stare. His mouth was pressed into a thin line as he searched her face.

"ANBU? Isn't that the gang that basically rules Konoha?"

His question surprised her. Not many outsiders knew about the shadow government that really ran the city. Then again, she realized as she eyed the tattoo on his forehead, not many people were underground fighters like Gaara. Slowly, she nodded. She belatedly realized that his face was very close to hers and he seemed to realize it too because his arms tightened around her. There was a fraction of a second where she wondered if he would kiss her and she knew that it wouldn't bother her if he chose to. But his eyes, the color of polished jade, narrowed a little.

Sakura cringed. She knew that look well. He was about to talk about their relationship. "Us" was a term that she tried to avoid using around him. Before he could speak, she opened her mouth.

"You said you wanted the truth. Let me finish?"

That seemed to pull Gaara from his train of thought. He nodded and released his hold on her. Sakura let her arms fall away too, scooting back a little bit on the bed. They sat, facing each others, knees just barely touching. Sakura paused for a moment, reassembling her thoughts.

"Do you know the Akatsuki?" she inquired. Gaara snorted.

"Who doesn't? They were a criminal group of mercenaries," he retorted.

"Good… except… they're still around. Just because the media hasn't caught on doesn't mean that they've stopped existing." She could feel the question in his eyes and half-smiled.

"ANBU- rather, Danzo-sama formed a contract with the Akatsuki. Collaboration in exchange for financial support and rights to several of his companies. So, the Akatsuki became his trump card. They formed a division of ANBU that he referred to as his Black Ops. The person who saved me back then was a part of Akatsuki," she explained. For a moment, she almost felt like she was leading a lecture with the way that Gaara's eager gaze was fixed on her.

"_Sakura-sama hasn't left her room in over a week," one of the maids whispered loudly from outside the door. Sakura didn't even bother to acknowledge the noise. She laid face-down on her bed, practically suffocating in the pink silk sheets. Come to think of it, she had always hated the color. It had been onii-chan who had chosen the ridiculous hue. There was some more whispering from the hallway and then the noise faded away. _

_Someone knocked on the door. _

"_Hime, may I come in?" a man's voice asked. She recognized him as one of the men always hanging around her father. For a moment, she considered refusing, but then she decided that she didn't care enough to say anything. The door opened anyway and she heard soft footsteps against the carpet. _

"_Hime, it's Uchiha. The household staff tells me that you refuse to leave your room," he said. Sakura pretended to be dead, unmoving on the mattress. She knew from experience that if ignored long enough, adults would get annoyed and leave her alone. It had worked on the butler and four maids and it would certainly work on this person. She waited awhile, perfectly still, but all the man did was sigh and sit on the opposite side of the bed. _

"_Go away," she finally muttered, still not looking up. _

"_I'm sorry that you're hurt," he just replied. _

"_Just leave me alone. Adults only lie and break promises," she whispered, feeling the bed beneath grow wet with tears again. And unlike the others who had come to visit, he didn't promise that things would get better. He didn't try to lie and say that her brother hadn't abandoned her. Instead, he put his hand on top of her head and listened quietly as she cried because for the second time in her short life, her family had been broken._

"Uchiha? Any relation to the one with a stick up his ass?" Gaara interrupted. Sakura almost smiled.

"He's Uchiha Sasuke's long-lost brother. Don't tell him you know or he'll rip your throat out," she responded with a strangely pained smile. She touched her chest, right over her heart.

"I almost feel bad. Sasuke lost his brother but I got to keep his. It's almost unfair. Anyway, I hated living in that house with Danzo-sama. When I was in the fifth grade, we moved to Otogakure and I found him screwing my only friend. When I was 13, I joined the underground fighting circuit. I had training as an agent for Danzo-sama so it wasn't hard for me to adjust. But some asshole stabbed me and Itachi-Nii-san put an end to that. And last March, I moved to Konoha and I met you," she finished blandly. Her calm tone seemed to out of place with her words.

"But I heard rumors that Danzo's gone missing," Gaara added with a strangely cautious tone. Sakura's lips spread into a mischievous smile.

"Rumors will be rumors," she vaguely replied as she stood. Gaara grabbed the edge of her sleeve, his expression suddenly hard again. His eyes were shining jades, cutting through her soul like a serrated knife.

"You still haven't told me who you are," he reminded her with a scowl. Sakura deftly flicked her arm, twisting his wrist into a painful angle. He slowly released her, never looking away from her face.

"I'm the Black Widow. We should get going soon, Sandman," she replied with a cold smile. For a moment, she startled herself. The facial expression, the acerbic wit: they all belonged to Inner Sakura. In a brief burst of hope, she wondered if Inner Sakura had somehow returned. But she knew that the inside of her mind was as cold and alone as it had been when she had woken up. It took a second, but she remembered Inner Sakura's words that had been thrown at her like daggers.

"_You are me, Sakura. But I'll never be you. I'm not REAL. I can NEVER replace you!"_

It felt strange without that inner source of rage and strength to channel from. But the more she searched, the more she realized that it had never disappeared. It was right there, an integral part of her. Inner Sakura had just been a way to blame someone else for her weakness and fear. As she stared into Gaara's suspicious gaze, she found the strength to turn away from him. She was able to stop herself from hugging him, telling him that she loved him and that she didn't want this to be a ruse anymore. Instead, she put her phone in her pocket, pulled on her black coat and silently exited the hotel room.

After all, Haruno Danzo's greatest lesson to her had been this:

"_Love is a bond that weakens. Sever it and you will climb to the top."_

Sakura heard his slow footfalls following her down the corridor but she didn't slow for him. The sound of her own steady breathing and the drum-like beat of her heart filled her ears. She closed her eyes, imagining Danzo's frigid gaze. And instead of fear, a profound sense of power flowed through her body. As she waited, the elevator doors slid open and inside were three men in black suits and matching expressions of boredom. When they saw her, however, their faces changed. At the far left, Kisame grinned, giving her a playful wink. In the middle, Sasori inclined his head. To the right, Itachi looked up from his cell phone and held out his hand to her.

Without hesitation, she took Itachi's hand. As the doors slid shut, she saw Gaara's eyes, full of accusation and hurt. And she mustered her cruelest smile for him.

There was no place for love in her life.

* * *

For every review, the major stick stuck up Sasuke's butt will be pulled out a little.


	13. Omake: Itachi's Side

Sorry guys. I don't know why but I've been having a lot of trouble writing lately. So here's a sort of side chapter. I feel like Itachi needs a little bit of love and maybe it'll clear up a little bit of confusion to see what Itachi's been thinking of all this time. I promise that the tournament will start/take place in the next chapter...as soon as my brain lets me write.

Hope you enjoy!

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 12.5: Itachi's Side

"Hey, come back to bed."

Itachi finished knotting his red necktie and observed it in the mirror. He gave it one last tug to the right before turning around. He quickly scanned the room, barely noticing the naked woman lounging in his bed. After a moment, he found his black blazer resting on the back of his leather sofa. As he pulled the jacket on, the woman's high-pitched whine assaulted his ears again.

"Come on. It's so early. Let's have one more go," she pleaded. Itachi's quiet sigh was drowned by what was supposedly an alluring sound that sounded more like a dying frog. When he reached for his cell phone on the nightstand, the woman's claw-like hand shot out and grabbed his wrist. On pure reflex, he twisted her arm, forcing her to release him. She let out a high screech of pain.

"Oh my God! What the hell's the matter with you?" she wailed as she scrambled off the bed, not even bothering to cover herself. She alternated between sobbing and roughly pulling on her clothes. With her eyeliner smeared, hair resembling a bird's nest and nose bright red from crying, she gave him one last sour glare. With another dramatic sniff, she strode out of the room, slamming the door behind her. The mirror hanging on the wall shook with the force. Itachi, however, felt a profound sense of relief with the woman gone.

What was her name? It was Yoko or something like that. Not that it mattered. She had warmed his bed for one night and now she was gone.

Itachi almost cringed when he imagined Sakura walking in to find a naked woman in his bed. He imagined that things would not end well for Yoko. Just as he imagined the teenage girl tearing Yoko's bleached hair out in fistfuls, the door swung open.

Something about Sakura's presence made him happy and exasperated all at once. Her long hair was perfectly straight, falling to the small of her back. There was a red lollipop dangling between her fingers as she leaned against the door frame. For once, she had abandoned her signature black jacket that bore her family crest. Instead, she was wearing a simple white t-shirt with artfully ripped jeans and a sleek gray jacket on top. Deidara's lighter hung from her neck, lying flat against her stomach. Her eyes were narrow as she surveyed the rumpled bed and his annoyed expression. Finally, she seemed to decide that she didn't care whoever had been in the room last night and settled for popping the candy in her mouth.

"No cigarette today?" Itachi wryly remarked as he checked the time on his phone. Sakura scowled as she crushed the lollipop to pieces between her molars.

"Don't remind me. I'm all out," she snapped back as she plucked the white stick from her mouth and tossed it into the trashcan by the door. Itachi, sighing, reached into his pocket. He offered the half-empty carton to Sakura but she wrinkled her nose. Of course, she would only smoke those French ones her brother had been obsessed with.

"Don't you have school today, Sakura?"

To his surprise, Sakura froze. The corners of her mouth twitched downwards, a sure sign that she wanted to cry. But just as quickly as the expression had come, it was gone. She quickly composed herself, hiding herself behind a faint smile. She refused to meet his eyes, instead pretending that she was fixing the sleeve of her jacket. Itachi watched the back of her head and gave a little sigh. He tucked his phone into his back pocket and, placing his hand on the small of her back, led her out of the room.

No matter how tall she grew, how strong she became and how much she complained, he could never stop himself from leading her, protecting her. As she peeked at him over her shoulder, he caught a glimpse of the little girl who had arrived at Danzo's mansion nearly 13 years ago. She had been shivering, half-starved for food and completely starved for affection. The memory of her big eyes filling with tears was something that still made his teeth clench.

"Nii-san?" she quietly said, touching his free arm. Itachi didn't need to look at her to know what sort of face she was making. Her aquamarine eyes would be wide, completely trusting. There would be a little furrow in her forehead and the little dimple in her right cheek would just barely be visible. He simply nodded, reassuring her that everything was alright. He felt Sakura's gaze trained on him for another second. But after a moment's hesitation, she released his sleeve and continued walking. As Itachi dared to look up, he noticed that Sakura's hair had grown even longer, nearly touching the small of her back.

"Are you ever going to cut it?" he asked her as he trailed after her. There was no room for them to walk side-by-side down the narrow hall. She didn't answer him. Only her short, brisk footfalls filled the silence, followed by his longer, quieter strides. When they reached the metal door, her fingers glowed with light green chakra as she slid them down the side. The door swung open slowly, making an eerie creaking noise. Sakura stepped onto the landing, staring down at the spiraling stairs. There was something so desperately empty about her face.

"I won't… not until I see him again. He asked me not to," she finally whispered.

Itachi's words cut through the quiet:

"Why are you being so stubborn?"

Sakura's eyes widened as she turned to look at him. He leaned against the doorframe, staring at her. He knew that the surge of emotion had turned his eyes red. But he didn't care. All he could see was her wounded expression. Itachi mentally berated himself. He had always tried his hardest to keep everything else from hurting her. And here he was, carelessly losing his temper and stabbing her where it hurt the most. As he watched, her carefully constructed mask fell to pieces.

Sakura never cried in front of people. Even on nights where she crawled into his bed after a mission, she hid her face from him. Maybe it was because she trusted him so much, but tears gathered in the corners of her eyes.

"Why would you say that?" she quietly said as her fists clenched at her sides. She stared straight into his eyes as her tears trailed down her pale cheeks. There was so much hurt and accusation in her gaze that he wanted to look away. A part of him was ashamed for making her cry. After all, he had sworn to protect her. But another part of him was angry, even furious. It seeped into his limbs, seizing control of his body and his mind.

"Because it's true," he snapped. He watched her flinch, as if the words physically hurt her.

"He **will** come back. I know he will," Sakura hiccupped through shaky breaths. She lifted a trembling hand to wipe her tears. But there was no conviction in her words. She looked so desperately frail and hopeless. And through all his frustration, Itachi knew that he wasn't angry at her.

"Sakura…" he said, his arms hanging uselessly at his sides. She pretended not to hear him. Her quiet sniffling cut through his chest with burning pain. His fingers twitched at the air, as if they could take back the words he had said to hurt her. He didn't know what to do.

That damn Deidara. All he had to do was look at her and she would always stop crying. All he had to do was be there and she would be smiling. And then, after she had invested all her love, all her hope in him, he had abandoned her. Then, he had left Sakura so broken and left her to rot all alone.

Itachi reached out for her, just barely touching the back of her hand. She shied away from him.

"Don't. Just don't…" she whispered. Anything would have been better than this. He would have gladly accepted a punch in the gut or a slap to the face. But not her tears. And with the shame clawing like acid at his throat, he turned his gaze from her and closed his eyes.

For the first time, he didn't know how to protect her.

**

* * *

**

"Pein will be returning from Snow Country soon. He says that he has news but didn't say if it was good or bad," Itachi said, skimming through the email on his cell phone. When he paused for her input, all he heard was the dull hum of the refrigerator. Then, he listened to the metallic clang of her soda can falling to the marble floor. A dull thud followed, the sound of a body falling. Terror seized his heart, clenching it with iron claws. He hadn't heard a bullet come through the window. And it couldn't have been poison in her drink.

As he turned, he saw Sakura lying flat on her back, eyes closed, fingers limp. He fell to his knees, fingers immediately searching for the pulse at her throat. After a second of searching, he felt the reassuring rhythm against his fingertips. A few of the maids had heard the noise and came running. They huddled around like a bunch of chattering birds, gasping and looking at one another.

Itachi ignored the noise as he cradled her head in his left hand. To his relief, there was no blood. But she was so unnaturally still, as if she were sleeping. One of the maids knelt down, trying to pull Sakura into a sitting position. Itachi turned to pin her with an acid glare that quickly sent her running.

"Make yourselves useful and go find Kisame and Kakuzu," he snapped, his anxious eyes immediately returning to Sakura. There was the light clatter of their matching shoes hitting the floor as they ran off.

"Sakura. Can you hear me?" he said, lightly shaking her shoulder.

He listened to Kisame's roared expletive from two floors up. But he focused on the way that Sakura's eyelids just barely twitched. As Kisame came thundering into the kitchen, Kakuzu hot on his heels, Itachi shook her again.

"Sakura, are you alright?"

As he spoke, her long eyelashes fluttered. Slowly, he watched her eyes open, watched the hazy green rove around the room. After a moment, she focused on him. Her lips formed words but no sound came out. For an instant, he wondered if the fall had somehow impacted her brain. But then, she gave a jerky little nod to say that she was okay. Kisame and Kakuzu knelt on the floor to help her sit up. Her hands shook as she tried to push her hair out of her face. Itachi gently pushed her fingers aside and helped her tuck her bangs behind her ear.

"What happened, Hime?" Kisame demanded. Kakuzu stood, scanning the room for anything suspicious. Sakura raised a trembling hand to touch her right temple.

"I-…I was so dizzy….and then….I'm tired, Itachi…." She trailed off, her eyes sliding shut again. Kisame immediately jerked forward, afraid that she had passed out again. Instead, she slowly slumped forward, resting her forehead against Itachi's collarbone. Her skin felt unnaturally cold against his.

"Let me sleep," she muttered. Itachi watched her for a moment and then glanced up at Kisame and Kakuzu. He jerked his head towards the door and, with some reluctance, the two men got to their feet and left. Itachi lifted Sakura into his arms, careful not to jostle her too much. Her head drooped against his chest even though her eyes were open. He walked past the anxious maids and up the stairs to the second floor.

"What happened?" he asked, not looking down at her. Sakura's fingers curled into his shirt, holding onto the fabric. But she didn't talk. As he stopped in front of her bedroom, he glanced down and found her staring up at him. There were dark circles under her eyes and her face looked a little thinner. Even the color of her eyes seemed a little bit dull. He was so tempted to ask her if she was alright. He wanted to see the girl who was always smiling: the one he had seen with Deidara.

"Let me sleep," Sakura simply repeated before she pressed her cheek against his chest and sighed. She was a shadow, lying limply in his arms. There was no way that she could feel so light. As Itachi opened the door and carried her to the four-poster bed, he kept his eyes on her pale face. For a moment, he wondered if she had fallen asleep. As he gently set her head on the pillow and pulled the sheets over her body, her eyes opened.

"My head hurts, Nii-san," she whispered as she turned her head to look up at him. Her lashes were damp with tears. Slowly, her hand slid out of the covers and reached for him.

"Will you be here tomorrow?" inquired Sakura as her eyes closed. Itachi placed his hand over hers, tucking it back under the warmth of the blankets. Her fingers lightly closed over his. He watched the steady rise and fall of her chest. Her face, pinched with pain, gradually relaxed until she resembled a porcelain doll. When he was absolutely sure that she couldn't hear him, that she wouldn't feel anything, he leaned over and pressed a kiss to her cheek and to whisper, "I hope so."

**

* * *

**

It was unbearably loud. Of course Deidara would choose to take Sakura to a flashy nightclub. He was great at that: showing off. As he weaved through the crowd, a few women eyed him, holding their heads higher and swaying their hips as they walked past. But they were cheap things, not nearly as important as the girl sitting upstairs. He carefully reached out with his chakra, cautiously feeling for her. But as soon as he released his cover, he felt a sharp stab as Sakura's chakra flared, letting him know that she had found him. He heaved a sigh as he brushed past yet another woman with a painted face and approached the two bulky bouncers guarding the stairs. They flexed their arms threateningly. But Itachi pointed to the earring in his left lobe. It was a flat black disk with silver Sakura petals pressed into the center. It was clear that the bouncers were not too intelligent, but they had enough sense to move for him. As he began climbing the metal stairs, Sasori appeared at the top step and began slowly descending.

"Hime's asking for you. Damn, she's gotten sharp," he yelled into Itachi's ear as they met in the middle. Itachi simply nodded, choosing not to try and shout over the sound of the pounding techno music blasting through the club. Sasori patted him once on the shoulder as he paused to shoot a dirty look up the stairs. The two men exchanged a look.

"Give him hell for me," Sasori said. And with one last pat, he continued down the stairs and out of the club. Itachi took a deep breath and took a moment to fix his tie before he continued up to the VIP lounge above.

The first things Itachi saw were Sakura's cold eyes fixated on him. Her lips were pulled up into the most mechanical, frigid smile. There was a glass of orange liquid held between dainty fingers. Their eyes met and Sakura's eyes immediately lit up. And then, he knew that it wasn't the girl he had come looking for. Still, he walked over to her, acting as if nothing was wrong. He paused to kiss her forehead and then sat in the empty spot between her and Deidara. It was significantly quieter upstairs, although the pounding music still shook the floor beneath his feet. He saw Deidara stop talking to look at him, but he pretended not to notice. After all, nothing irritated Iwa no Deidara more than being unnoticed.

"Do you want a drink?" Inner Sakura asked with a coy smile, reclaiming his attention. Still, Itachi felt Deidara's glower shooting into the back of his head. Inner Sakura pointed to the drink in her hands and Itachi could smell the alcohol on it. He fixed her with a stern look.

"You're not legal, Hime," he reminded her. For an instant, Inner Sakura's eyes widened. She had noticed the distinction in titles. But it didn't seem to bother her. In fact, her smile only grew bigger as she snapped towards one of the nervous club employees who had been hiding in the corner.

"Neither is my business. Whiskey?" Inner Sakura offered, without leaving him much of a choice. He considered refusing, but he had been witness to her nasty temper and reluctantly accepted. The frightened employee immediately ran off to get the drink. Inner Sakura crossed one leg over the other, revealing a dangerous amount of thigh to the people gathered around Deidara. One of the men leered, his tongue darting out to wet his cracked lips. Itachi felt the chakra surge to his eyes and his vision momentarily went red. The man noticed, blanching, and quickly turned away.

"So... what's Sakura up to?" Itachi asked as the employee scuttled over to set the glass of cool whiskey on the table and hurry back to his corner. To his irritation, Inner Sakura seemed completely delighted by the question. To his right, Deidara abruptly stopped talking. His chakra suddenly fluctuated, piercing through the air like knives.

"Sleeping," the girl replied as she ran her finger along the edge of her glass. Itachi thought back to the phone call, remembering how her voice had suddenly become perfectly level towards the end of the conversation. His eyes narrowed as he tried to put the pieces together.

"For how long?"

And just like he had suspected, the girl smirked and shrugged, replying with a blasé, "Hm… since your phone call? She hasn't been feeling well anyway."

Deidara's hand shot out and grabbed Sakura's arm. It didn't matter that the girl inside wasn't Sakura. It was her body. And he didn't have any right to be touching her, not after what kind of damage he had done to her.

"What the hell are you two talking about, yeah?" Deidara demanded. Itachi felt his hand twitch towards the other man. He wanted to rip his fingers away from her. He wanted to keep him as far away from Sakura as possible. She couldn't handle being hurt like that again. She would break. But as he looked up, he saw utter disgust spread across her face. And even though he knew that she wasn't really Sakura, some part of him was relieved to know that even a small part of her knew not to go near Deidara. As he watched, she shook her brother's hand off like he was some sort of bug.

It was better that way.

He would protect this girl until the end. Even if she ended up crashing and burning. Even if she ended up using him and discarding him, that would be fine. As long as one day, he could make her smile again.


	14. Narcolepsy

Since this question has come up more than once, I feel obligated to answer.

Is Itachi in love with Sakura or does he just love her like a younger sister?  
The answer: Your guess is as good as his. He's really unsure of which way his feelings are swaying and you might figure out what he feels by the end of the story. Yes, I'm evil for keeping this a mystery.

I'm not really one hundred percent satisfied with how this chapter turned out but I figured stewing over it wouldn't accomplish much. This is the last official chapter of the fic. There will be an epilogue after this and I am leaning towards having some sort of sequel.

I think I lost a couple of brain cells writing this chapter because I hit my keyboard with my face more than once. Please forgive overall fail-ness of this chapter and enjoy!

* * *

Black Widow and the Sandman

Chapter 13: Narcolepsy

"So…I thought you were just going to come see my match," Sakura said as the elevator doors slid shut. Her smile faded into a small frown, puckering her face. Kisame heaved a sigh as he fished a pack of cigarettes out of his pocket. Without thinking, Sakura snatched the packet out of his hands. He stared at her.

"Read," she said, pointing to the 'No Smoking' sign above the doors. He grumbled under his breath but settled for shoving his hands into his pockets. There was an acidic bite to her voice that he recognized all too well. The three men exchanged wary glances. Whatever had gone on with her teammate had obviously led her in a foul mood. Sasori lifted his eyebrows at Itachi. Kisame did the same, silently urging Itachi to talk as he was the least likely to lose a limb. And Sakura stood waiting, her already fraying temper coiling tighter and tighter until the vein in her temple began to physically throb. She could feel the apprehension around her and she instinctively knew that her beloved, yet impossibly pig-headed brother had something to do with it. She tightly crossed her arms across her chest, her nails cutting into her soft palms.

"Deidara seems to believe… that you're willing to abandon your empire to live with him. Yesterday night, after we dropped you off at the hotel, he demanded that we 'hand you over'," Itachi finally said. They held their breaths, waiting for her reaction. She was so still, like the calm right before an explosive thunderstorm. After a moment, she let her hands fall to her sides and she took a deep breath. Just as the three men relaxed a little, chakra exploded to life on her hands and forearms. It swirled up and down her skin in iridescent green patterns. The smell of ozone filled the small elevator as it slowly made its way down to the lobby. Thin wisps of the chakra snaked off the tips of her fingers, evaporating in whiffs of dark smoke.

"Sakura," Itachi said, firmly grasping her arm. The chakra seared against his skin, filling the air with a sickening sizzling sound. Sakura's eyes widened and the green immediately retreated back into her. She clasped his burned hand in hers, her expression torn between anger and embarrassment.

"That was stupid of you," she finally said, her forehead furrowing. Itachi gave her a faint smile and placed his uninjured hand on top of her head. Her cheeks grew hot as she realized how childish she had just seemed. Of course, it was obvious that her brother would want her to live with him. Of course. And when she had been younger, loveless, she had adored that overprotective side of him. To be loved too much was better than being unloved. But it was degrading that he automatically assumed that she would throw away all her hard work just to make his fantasies come true. Itachi's uninjured fingers lightly ran through her hair, brushing her bangs out of her face. Sakura looked up at him, into the calm eyes that never seemed to judge her. She looked over at Sasori, who was always the voice of reason, pulling her back to reality. And Kisame dramatically rolled his eyes, always trying to make her smile.

But it was the memories that pulled her heart away from them. On the dark nights where she would wake up screaming for her dead mother, Deidara had always held her close. When she had gotten sick, he had stayed by her side, putting cool cloths on her forehead and feeding her spoonfuls of soup. And every year, when Danzou-sama didn't bother to remember her birthday, he had always gotten her a present. Each time she remembered his kindness, her chest squeezed a little tighter until she almost forgot how to breathe normally. The elevator shook as it landed on the first floor, jostling Sakura straight from her thoughts.

"Be safe," Itachi whispered into her ear. Sakura sighed as she pulled away, her fingertips lingering on his charred hand. Her eyes darted down to his fingers and back up to his face. There was an odd tension in his gaze and she knew that he was trying to hide the pain. Lifting his hand up, she pressed a light kiss to his fingertips, where the burns were the least severe.

"I'll be alright," he reassured her with a faint smile. With one last look at the damage she had done, Sakura took a step back from him. Sasori reached over to give her a quick but tight hug, holding her close. Kisame squeezed her shoulder with a smile, revealing pointed teeth. The elevator doors slid open, shattering the deafening silence.

"Thank you," Sakura mumbled as the gold doors slid open. Putting on her bravest face, she turned her backs to the three men, the black spider on her back standing proud. And with slow, measured steps, she walked through the lobby and into the gray morning. The heat wave had quickly passed, revealing the land's true weather: gray and cold. Even with her black jacket on, Sakura felt the faint nip of early-morning chill touch her spine. There was a gray van parked out front, coated in a fine layer of sand, a souvenir from their two-hour drive. Kisame hung out of the window, grumbling under his breath.

"Hey, Kank?" Sakura called as she walked up to the car. The man blearily opened one eye, his stomach rumbling obnoxiously.

"If you're from Suna, why is your dojo in Konoha?" she asked as she yanked the passenger side door open. Kankuro sighed as he took his bare feet off the dashboard. He shoved them back into his sandals as Sakura climbed into the van and shut the door.

"Some problems with gangs and Gaara wouldn't stop getting kicked out of schools," Kankuro vaguely replied as he started the car. Sakura glanced over her shoulder and saw Gaara trudging up to the car. The back door snapped open. Gaara threw himself into the seat, jostling the entire van. Sakura stared out the window with feet propped up on the dashboard. She had to look uncaring. That was the only way to keep these people far away. If they weren't close to her, she couldn't tangle them up in what was about to happen. She felt Gaara's glare on her back during the entire fifteen minute ride.

"Fuck this," Kankuro sighed as a guard flagged them down at the stadium's front gate. He put the battered van in park and opened the window. The wintry air outside invaded the car, sucking the warmth right out. Sakura pulled her jacket a little tighter around herself and curled up in her seat, tucking her cold feet under her legs.

"We need your papers and once you've been processed, you'll receive a ticket and line up to enter the parking lot," the guard sneered as he proudly patted his stomach. He gestured toward the impossibly long line snaking down several city blocks. Sakura rolled her eyes. It was always the people who had no purpose in life that lorded what little power they had over others.

"We're Team Suna. You know. Today's contestants for the match?" Kankuro said, barely managing to stop himself from rolling his eyes. Gaara snorted from the backseat, finally tearing his eyes away from Sakura. Kankuro argued with the guard for a minute until Sakura's bare feet slid off the dashboard. She felt Gaara's eyes suddenly return to her as she lifted her feet up to tug her boots into place. Letting her feet fall to the ground, she snapped impatiently in the guard's direction. The two men stopped arguing to look her way, Kankuro with relief and the guard with disbelief that a teenage girl would order him around like a waiter. Still, the guard squared his shoulders and marched over to her side of the car. Kankuro opened the window and leaned against the steering wheel, waiting for her to work her magic.

"Is there a problem, young lady?" the guard growled through his teeth. He stuck his head into the window, trying to intimidate her. But all Sakura felt was repulsion at his bad breath and the hairy mole on his right cheek. Resisting the urge to cringe, she pulled down the collar of her shirt. Kankuro's face turned bright red and Gaara immediately leapt out of his seat to see what the problem was.

Directly over her heart, in the darkest black ink, was a black spider. It seemed to come alive, like it would leap out of her skin and bite the guard's eyes out. The guard blanched and began sputtering half-sentences that sounded like apologies.

"Please excuse me. I didn't recognize you," he finally managed to say, turning completely white. Sakura smirked as she leaned back in her seat. She watched as the flustered man fumbled around in his breast pocket before extracting a bright yellow pass. She could see the sweat beading on his face as he handed it over with shaking hands. It would be a lie to say that she didn't enjoy his terror. She finally understood why people's terrified faces always made Inner Sakura laugh. The power brought an even more pleasant feeling than the buzz of alcohol. It was a mixture of satisfaction and pride that trumped any adrenaline rush. Sakura looped the yellow piece of plastic over the rearview mirror and then let her hands fall back into her lap. The guard was still hanging through the window like a lost puppy.

"Have a nice day," she said and Kankuro began to close the window, forcing the guard's head out.

"I'd hate to piss you off, Sakura. You're damn scary sometimes," Kankuro muttered as he drove through the parking lot, searching for an open spot. Sakura ignored him as she stared off at the stadium in the distance, listening to the unnatural silence outside. It was as if everyone was holding their breaths, waiting for the fight that was to take place in two hours. She wanted to look back, to see what he felt. She wanted to know if she had really hurt him. Instead, she locked her muscles in place and searched deep inside herself to pull on her mask. She was Haruno Sakura, daughter of Haruno Danzo and the leader of ANBU. She didn't have time for love when she had spent most of her life being honed as the perfect weapon.

She loved him.

It made her sick to her stomach, but she wanted him. She wanted to touch him, to kiss him, to listen to his deep voice in her ear. She wanted to wake up every morning with him holding on to her. She wanted to see his sleepy smile, to share secrets and to lie in bed on lazy weekends with their limbs tangled together.

To her horror, she even found herself imagining their married life. Maybe he would continue in the world of underground fighting. Maybe he would end up running the dojo with his siblings. All she knew was that she would drift back from the edges of sleep as he crawled into their bed late at night. His muscular body would be warm as he pressed his body against hers and cradled her against his chest. No matter how tired he was, he would kiss her hair and whisper about his day. And she would nestle up against him, half-listening as she fell back asleep. She wanted to do every single clichéd thing couples did in movies. She wanted to spend dark and stormy nights in his arms because she felt safe there. But it was impossible.

"Everything ends today," she whispered. It made her chest ache that Gaara quietly replied, "Aah," from the back seat. But she shook her head to clear away the thoughts of their dysfunctional romance. She forced her brain to focus on the upcoming match. She mentally compared the stats and information she had read on the Konoha team's files just a few months ago. After a quiet moment of consideration, she leaned her head against her seat and sighed.

"I call Uchiha," she declared. Gaara's glare pierced her back. She was well-aware of the ongoing bitterness between the two, but she had her own agenda to deal with.

"Hyuuga," Gaara finally relented through grinding teeth.

"Guess I get Uzumaki then," Kankuro conceded, sounding less than enthusiastic as he eased the van into an open parking space. He shifted the gear into Park and the trio sat in the suddenly silent van. Kankuro squirmed in his seat a little, probably sensing the tension between Sakura and Gaara. He glanced over, meeting Sakura's eyes and she lifted an eyebrow.

"I thought you were starving to death," she remarked when Kankuro continued to look at her. As if to accentuate her point, his stomach gurgled unhappily. Sakura pressed her lips together, unsure whether she was amused or annoyed. After a minute, she eased the door open and slipped out of the car, leaving the two brothers behind. As soon as she left the heated bliss of the van, Iwagakure's cold air swept around her. Her open-toed boots did little to keep her extremities warm. Sakura glanced around furtively to make sure no one was around before channeling chakra to her toes to warm them. Her pace was neither fast nor slow. She was just walking through a quiet parking lot.

It had been nearly two years since she had felt any excitement as she approached a ring. The air felt stagnant around her, not buzzing with anticipation. She could almost feel the sweat trailing down her face as she raised her head to look at the crowd. There would be hundreds of hungry eyes taking in her bloodied opponent and then her. The feel of her heart pounding inside her ribcage hurt as much as it filled her with joy. But as soon as she blinked, she was standing in a cold parking lot. The roar of the crowd was replaced with Kankuro and Gaara's shoes shuffling across the asphalt. She took a deep breath and the air stung the inside of her chest. Disappointment flooded through her, settling like a heavy rock in her heart.

"Go on without me. I'll catch up," she suddenly said as her heels dug into the ground. She needed to get away for just a few minutes. Maybe she would go for a quick run. All she needed was to have a minute to finally breathe. Her stop was so sudden that the brothers walked right past her. Gaara wheeled around, his jade eyes already sharp with accusation. Kankuro stopped too but remained at a distance as he watched Gaara stalk up to her, only stopping when their toes nearly touched.

"What?" Sakura snapped as the red-head stared her down. For a moment, his lips pulled back in a sneer and she thought he would yell at her. She could see the hurt stewing inside of him, threatening to burst forward in a torrent of anger. She wouldn't begrudge him that. She owed it to him. Instead, Gaara took her hand, his expression tight with pain.

"Come back soon," he gruffly said. Lowering his eyes, he turned back to his brother and continued on to the stadium. Sakura stood, watching his broad shoulders that seemed to be carrying a thousand pounds with each step. She watched them cross the asphalt, finally reach the stadium and enter the building. As the glass door swung shut behind them, Sakura unclenched her hands and let the chakra flowing in her feet focus. With a deep breath, she bent her knees and jumped into the air. She sailed past the light poles and over parked cars. The wind whipped her face, stinging her cheeks and making her throat ache. But there was a sense of deep relief as she landed on top of the stadium.

"Are you really going to let him go, Sakura?" she asked herself as she stared down at the parking lot. As if responding to her, the gathering crowd inside roared approvingly. A soft laugh escaped her lips as she stared upwards. The few feeble rays of sunlight visible disappeared as a huge cloud was carried past by the wind.

"Breathe, Sakura," she whispered as she closed her eyes and jumped. The concrete sidewalk below cracked a little when she landed. She counted her breaths as she pulled the metal handle, opened the door and stepped into the lobby. Warm air washed over her like a blessing. She sighed as she reached into her pocket, fished out a cigarette and lit it. Her lighter fell back against her chest with a smack against the place where her now-hidden tattoo was. The smoke filled her mouth and throat with the familiar bitter taste, unwinding the tight knot in her chest. She exhaled, and through the smoke, she saw his hair blazing in the crowd. She turned away. She couldn't deal with him.

Maybe after another cigarette and some black coffee.

**

* * *

**

Sakura sucked on her fourth cigarette of the morning as reclined in the plastic chair. A faint gray haze filled the room with a bitter smell. There was a cigarette resting between Gaara's lips but it was unlit. He was sitting in the chair across from hers, eyes unfocused and arms crossed over his chest. Kankuro paced furiously, his shoes threatening to burn holes into the carpet. Sakura's eyes followed the puppeteer's footsteps.

"Why do you think Grass suddenly dropped out? I mean, they had a one in three chance of winning all that money?" Kankuro thought out loud, coming to a certain stop. Gaara glanced over at him, his expression filled with interest.

"Yeah…I've been wondering too…" agreed as he looked at Sakura. She was unsurprised when she felt his accusatory stare on the side of her face. She pretended to be absorbed in thought as she sucked at the very last remains of her cigarette and then tossed it into the nearby ashtray. When she reached into the carton for a fresh one, Gaara cleared his throat.

"Do you know anything, Haruno?" the red-head inquired, expression tight with irritation. Sakura smirked as she placed the cigarette between her lips and reached for the silver chain around her neck. Her thumb glided over the lighter and an orange flame jumped up. She held it up, letting the flames lick the paper until it began to sizzle quietly. She tilted her hair back to blow a long stream of smoke into the air. The gray curled around her mouth and face. She peered up at him through the haze.

"Team Grass was using steroids so they were banned," one of the paramedics waiting by the door suddenly piped up. Sakura nodded once to confirm his statement. She felt oddly calm. With the nicotine filling her brain and the rich smell of Gaulouises, her brother's scent, surrounding her, she could almost see the haze separating her from her two teammates. It was easy to bury her feelings deep inside her heart. Something trivial like love was shut away by the steel wall in her mind. She closed her eyes and listened to the crowd's excited chatter outside.

So when Kankuro touched her shoulder, telling her it was time to go, she was ready. It wasn't Haruno Sakura that walked into the arena: it was the Black Widow.

Sakura tossed her lit butt on the concrete as she exited the waiting room. It fizzled against the floor for a while but after a while, the wisps of smoke faded away, leaving just its bitter smell.

It was cold outside. Her head hurt. She closed her eyes and swallowed once, tasting the tar and smoke lingering in her mouth and throat. When she opened her eyes, Team Konoha had lined up across from them. Naruto scratched the back of his head and paused to give her an awkward, nervous wave. Neji's face was a mixture of anger and confusion. His eyes met Sakura's for a moment, but he quickly looked away. And Uchiha Sasuke, his face contorted with unconcealed hatred, glared straight at Gaara.

"Hey," Gaara suddenly whispered, not looking away from Sasuke, and nudged Sakura's arm. She slowly turned her head towards him, not really paying attention.

"This is to piss Uchiha off," he muttered under his breath before grabbing her face in pulling her in for a rough, angry kiss. It was supposed to look passionate, and Sakura supposed that some women would have been delighted. But all she could feel was that Gaara was hurt. Even with his tongue plundering her mouth, all she could do was pity him. His teeth scraped against her lower lip and she felt the metallic taste of blood on her tongue. When he finally released her, he was panting, eyes already a little glazed over. His hand rested against her shoulder. It was that familiar warmth that made the voice locked behind the wall scream, beating its hands against the barrier. Sakura stared into his jade eyes, doing her best to look indifferent. She knew she had succeeded when she saw the hopeless anguish, hollow and dark, seep into his gaze. He had lost all faith in her. And part of her was grateful that he finally understood. But the small corner of her heart that had been locked away cried out.

She wiped her mouth on the back of her hand, pausing to observe the red streak across her pale skin. Chakra sizzled at the edges of the bite mark, closing up the wound with ease. Sakura ran her tongue over the newly-healed skin, wiping away the last traces of blood. The coppery smell made her stomach churn. She wiped her thumb across the corner of Gaara's mouth where some of it had rubbed off. She felt her lips curling up into a cold smile.

"Quite a tantrum, Sandman. You're such a child," she whispered before turning back to the other team.

"Welcome to the final round of Annual International Marshal Arts Tournament! This year's contestants have been particularly impressive. Today's final round is the long-awaited battle between Team Suna and Team Konoha!" the referee shouted into his microphone. The audience should have exploded into cheers. Instead, it was dead silent. All eyes were fixed on the waiting contestants. The referee coughed nervously before he continued.

"During this last round, there is only one rule: Once your opponent has lost consciousness, no more injuries are to be dealt. There will be no penalties dealt for death unless the killing blow is delivered after the loser has lost consciousness. The team with the most people standing wins the grand prize," the referee quickly rattled off as he scurried up the stairs leading to his viewing platform in the VIP section. There was a thick layer of bullet-proof glass surrounding it, ensuring his safety. Sakura scoffed.

Sasuke immediately took a step towards Gaara but the red-head stepped aside, gesturing to Sakura. Sasuke looked confused as he looked towards Kankuro but the puppeteer had already sidled up next to Sakura, directly across from Naruto.

There was something profoundly empty about Sasuke's eyes as they squared off across from each other. There was sweat beading across his forehead as he stared at her. She tightened the Velcro of her gloves, flexing her fingers to test the fabric.

"Don't underestimate any of them," she heard Gaara murmur behind her.

"Tch. Watch your own back," she sneered.

"Begin!"

A bell rang through the silent stadium, signaling the beginning of the match. To her right, 2 shapes flickered out of sight. Half a second later, she heard the metallic screech of knives clashing. Karasu materialized, teeth clicking furiously as it unraveled itself. Kankuro's chakra strings glowed cerulean as Karasu pierced the air like a bullet. Red sparks flew into the air as Naruto deflected a blow with his kunai.

"He can use chakra?" Naruto bellowed, cursing the heavens.

Sakura stared straight at Sasuke as Karasu's arm smashed into a wall. Someone detonated a smoke bomb, enveloping the arena in darkness. Sakura barely acknowledged when Neji and Gaara disappeared into the smog, the sounds of their combat ringing through the darkness.

"You're scared," Sakura scoffed as she heard Sasuke taking slow steps toward her. She saw his silhouette the same time that he saw hers. They began slowly circling each other, one measured step at a time. The smoke began to clear and she saw his eyes bleed red. His jaw was twitching.

How cute.

"You're scared," she repeated as her boots scuffed against the worn cement. The wind whistled above the stadium's open ceiling, howling as it scraped against stone. His eyes narrowed, burning like live coals.

"You're not?" Sasuke retorted, flinching a little as someone flew past him, slamming into the arena wall with a sickening crack. Sakura reached back, as if to pull her hair off the back of her neck. In one smooth motion, she pulled her katana from the sheath, listening to the steel grate against steel, and flew past him. He stood, completely frozen as strands of his dark hair slowly fluttered to the ground. A thin line of red appeared across his cheek. Sakura turned on her heel, smoothly ducking as Karasu flew past, blades protruding from his palms and mouth.

"What do you like about me?" she suddenly demanded as she watched Sasuke's back shake a little.

"Is it my face?"

Sakura rested the flat side of her blade against her shoulder as she waited. Her words seemed to pull him from his stupor. Still visibly shaken, Sasuke tried to brush off his surprise with the usual arrogant tilt of his head.

"You're hot. And you're playing hard to get. What else is there?" he sneered as he turned to face her. For the first time that day, Sakura's face broke into a real smile. She swung her katana in a wide arc, listening to it whistle as it split the air. After inclining her head in a mock-bow, she ran her fingertip along the edge of her blade. She paused for a moment, looking from her gleaming katana back to Sasuke's face.

"Do you like to dance, Uchiha-san?" Sakura asked as she sheathed her weapon. The floor seemed to shift a little and she glanced over. There was a giant crack in the ground and sand swirled around Gaara's arms and legs like a mass of writhing snakes.

"Let's dance," she said as she drew chakra to her foot and slammed it onto the concrete. Sasuke stared, completely mute as a deep fissure radiated from her heel. The cement crumbled in on itself, sending puffs of powdered rock into the air. The ground began to collapse under its own weight, tearing itself apart. Sakura watched Sasuke lithely jump to safe ground nearby, his crimson eyes boring into her.

Adrenaline flowed into her blood like a drug. Her heart began to pound and sweat gathered on the back of her neck.

"Finally," she sighed as she felt the long-anticipated rush. She closed her eyes, listening to the metal clashing and someone's roar of pain. There was a soft rush of air just an instant before Sasuke appeared in front of her. He pulled the sword from his purple belt and it crackled to life, icy blue chakra running through it like electricity. Her upper lip pulled up into a sneer as she channeled chakra to her hands and feet. Sasuke's eyes widened with surprise and he momentarily forgot to keep his guard up.

"You're not the only one with chakra," she laughed as she slammed her open palm against his unprotected left shoulder, sending him skidding back a few meters. It felt so ridiculously good to let her full power flow through her. There was no need to keep herself hidden and there was no reason to hold back. When Sasuke staggered to halt and glowered at her, she knew that he would hesitate to kill her. What a pity. She could see him trying to analyze her with his sharingan, to try and analyze her attacks and anticipate her moves. His muscles automatically tensed when she took a step forward.

"Come on, _Sasuke-kun__**. **_Fight me. I would **die** for you…to do so," she seethed, holding her arms out at her sides.

"_Sasuke-kun, please! I love you! I don't want to move away! I would die for you!" Sakura screamed as she held onto his sleeve. Sasuke coldly brushed her off as he stuffed his hands into his pockets._

"_You're so annoying, Sakura," he replied, pulling out of her desperate grasp. Sakura lost her balance, falling to her knees. Tears rolled down her face as she watched him slowly walk away. Her knees stung where the unforgiving sidewalk had scraped her. As she watched his back disappear into the darkness, she wailed. Not even ten years old, Haruno Sakura had experienced her first real heart-break. Danzo-sama's associated waited by the car, their sunglasses glinting in the sunlight. _

"_Are we all set to go?" a familiar voice inquired as footsteps approached._

"_No, Uchiha-dono. Hime is-"_

"_Let me through," Itachi cut in, his tone freezing over. Sakura hunched over, sobbing into her hands. His even footsteps stopped right beside her. The smell of his aftershave enveloped her as he gathered her into his arms and lifted her. He rubbed her back, trying to calm her in hushed tones._

"_Onii-chan," she whimpered, hiding her face against Itachi's shoulder. Itachi's hand froze._

"_I want Deidara-Onii-chan," Sakura whispered, his tiny hands grabbing the front of his jacket. She wanted him to be there with his warm, comforting voice. She wanted to be hugged, to be immersed in the smoky smell that had always lingered in the room even after he had gone. He would pet her head and make her laugh. Where was he when he had promised to always protect her? Itachi's arms tightened around her._

"_Hime. I… I will protect you while Deidara is gone. I'll be your brother from now on," Itachi swore as he stroked her tangled hair. _

_But it hurt. It hurt so much that even Itachi's words didn't make things any better. She just wanted to sink into the ground to where her mother was. To sink forever._

Sasuke's muscles seemed to lock in place as he stared at her. His jaw hung slack. He didn't even seem to notice when Naruto staggered backwards and knocked into his arm. The blonde spat out an apology as he dove back into his battle with the puppeteer.

"Come on, Sasuke-kun. Tell me I'm annoying," Sakura continued. All the bitterness hiding in her heart suddenly spilled out. It tasted foul against her tongue, like a stale cigarette. But it had festered for so long in her chest that there was nowhere else for it to hide. So it emerged, stewed in seven years worth of anger.

"S….Sakura-chan? From 5th grade?" he stammered. His gaze was so childish and open that Sakura almost pitied him. Instead of responding, she sprang and smashed her fist straight into his left temple. Sasuke staggered, falling on his butt. He struggled back to his feet, swaying a little and cupping his hand to the side of his head. He might as well have had stars and birds circling his head. Even though his eyes were having trouble focusing, he looked over at Sakura. To her surprise (and to some extent, amusement), he looked angry.

"What the fuck do you want from me? An apology? I was fucking ten!" Sasuke spat. He shook his head, like a dog after a bath.

"Do you want to know a secret, Sasuke-kun?" Sakura asked, ignoring his comment. She pressed a finger to her lips, as if suppressing an all-knowing smile. After a dramatic pause, she smiled.

"I'm not really dating him. It was all a fucking ruse to get you and pretty-boy off my back. Worked pretty well, huh? Did it piss you off?" she taunted. Even to her own ears, it sounded petty and shallow. But it worked. Sasuke bristled as an incoherent snarl of frustration tore from his throat.

"Yeah. I was fucking with you the **entire time**. Are you mad? Are you?"

Sasuke's sword ripped through the air, crackling with chakra. Sakura just barely managed to move to the side as the sword smashed into the ground, incinerating the broken chunks of cement. A laugh rose from somewhere deep inside her chest. His anger made him sloppy. His sword swung through the air again, missing her arm completely. Sakura drew her foot back and it collided with his ribs. She caught the crackle of bone snapping as he flew backwards, smashing into the wall.

"Come on, Sasuke-kun. Entertain me a little," she taunted. But as she watched Sasuke rise to his feet, a shaking hand pressed to his side, she noticed something. There was another chakra lingering the air. It sizzled, white-hot, completely different from anyone else's chakra. She whirled around a fraction of a second before kusanagi, screaming with chakra, sliced into her right shoulder. The pain was so sudden, so blindingly intense, that she couldn't even scream. Her face contorted with silent agony as she gripped the gaping wound. Blood spilled out between her fingers and soaked into her shirt.

"Don't get too carried away, Haruno. Just because I want to do you doesn't mean I'll go easy on you," Sasuke sneered. Sakura gritted her teeth as tendrils of chakra rose from the throbbing gash. They spread across the bleeding mass of torn nerves and flesh, knitting the skin back together. All the while, Sakura felt the hatred bleeding into her eyes. The desire to close her hands around his throat and watch his eyes roll back overtook her. Sasuke took a step back from her, his lips pulling into a tight line. When she pulled her hand away and wiped the blood on her shirt, the skin was a little pink and puckered but definitely healed.

"Bite me," she spat.

"Gladly," Sasuke replied with equal venom as he lifted kusanagi high into the air. The blade was slick with thick, dark blood.

Sakura took a step just as he did. He moved so fast that he was just a faint flicker in the corner of her eye. He reappeared, blade crackling with raw energy. Sakura managed to catch him in the elbow with her forearm, deflecting the deadly attack enough to miss her uninjured shoulder. The katana instead grazed the tips of her hair, searing the tips into soot. He charged again, teeth bared and katana swirling furiously. For an instant, she could have sworn that his sharingan shifted, as if the colors had inverted. But when she blinked, it was back to normal and she quickly pushed the thought from her mind. She barely had enough time to rake her katana from the sheath and parry his blow. The force of the strike reverberated through the steel, making her still-tender shoulder ache. Sasuke took a moment to catch his breath and Sakura used the opportunity to slam her elbow into his right arm. They broke apart, Sasuke gripping his arm, in obvious pain, but too stubborn to say anything. The next time Sasuke attacked, Sakura's katana split in two under the sheer force. She tossed the broken metal aside, her upper lip curling.

"Getting tired, Haruno?" Sasuke sneered through pants as she dodged his swift jabs. Sakura responded by just barely grazing his nether regions. His clever retort was to slice through her forearm so hard that kusanagi struck bone. Sakura snarled as she aimed a bone-shattering punch at his head. She just barely managed to catch herself when Sasuke dodged.

They eyed each other, Sakura rolling her slightly sore shoulder. It was Sasuke that charged first, his footsteps heavy and hard against the ground. Sakura took a deep breath through her nose and waited. She couldn't lose her temper. It would make her lose focus. She watched Sasuke run at her and just as the blade pierced her stomach, she disappeared. Sasuke stabbed through the air and stumbled forward. He quickly righted himself and swiveled around several times. But she was gone. Sasuke turned in a circle and Sakura could see the veins standing out in his arms as he clenched his sword. She watched the other two battles from the very top of the stadium.

Karasu was in pieces and Kankuro was engaged in hand-to hand combat with Naruto. His movements were sluggish and sloppy. Taijutsu had never been Kankuro's forte. That battle had already been lost. It was only a matter of time before Naruto managed to land the finishing blow. A little ways off, Neji was attacking Gaara's wall of sand. His violent, spiraling attacks were useless against the Sandman's absolute armor. Neji would wear himself out and Gaara would only need to move in for the kill. Sakura immediately found Sasuke, alone and alert. She carefully looked him over, searching for the perfect area to attack. After some deliberation, her eyes honed in on his legs.

A quick end would be the best for Sasuke. He would have been a worthy opponent for anyone else. Not her. And for once, the voice trapped behind the wall agreed with her.

Sakura took a couple of deep breaths and eyed the distance she would have to fall before she took a few steps back. After one last look, she ran and jumped off the edge of the opening, plummeting through the hole in the ceiling. The icy air tore against her skin as she fell and the ground seemed to come up to swallow her whole. She gathered chakra to her feet and joints to absorb the oncoming shock. An instant before she landed, Sakura smiled.

"Look up," she whispered and Sasuke's head snapped up as his femur bone snapped in two.

Sasuke's strangled scream pierced the air. He fell to the ground, convulsing. Tears welled up in his eyes as his empty hands clawed at the ground. There was a heavy thud and out of the corner of her eye, Sakura saw Kankuro fall to the ground, his chest heaving. When she turned back to Sasuke, there was a thin line of saliva dribbling out of the corner of his mouth. His fingers dug into the crumbling cement and his lips soundlessly trembled.

"Breaking a femur bone is supposed to be the most painful experience a human can have," Sakura coldly observed as she crouched beside him. One of Sasuke's twitching hands rose, grasping at the air. His wide eyes tried to focus on her but she could see that the pain was too much for his brain to process.

"Do you want me to make it stop?" she whispered with her kindest smile. Sasuke gave a jerky nod as the tears streamed down his face. His face contorted into the face of absolute agony as another choked shout gurgled up his throat. Sakura took her time refastening the Velcro of her glove as Sasuke lay whimpering in the dust. She grabbed Sasuke by the front of his shirt and forced him to sit up so that he was at eyelevel. She could feel him shaking from the sheer agony. The wall in her heart faltered a little and she began to pity him. It was then that it occurred to her that it was suddenly silent in the stadium. The sounds of the other battles were gone. She could hear footsteps approaching, occasionally kicking a stray piece of broken concrete aside.

"S-S-Sa-u….ra," Sasuke choked out, swallowing thickly. His chest heaved as he tried to stop himself from screaming. Sakura paused, looking back at his pale face. He struggled desperately to bring his hands up and wrap them around her arm that was holding him up. A high-pitched whimper escaped his clenched teeth.

"B-br…th….w…he….re?"

"Your brother? Who told you I knew where he was?" Sakura asked, her anger receding. Instead, she was amused. She already had a good idea of who had revealed the information, though. Unless Itachi himself had decided to leave Sasuke a message, only their perverted former homeroom teacher would be able to reveal anything.

"Kakashi?" she inquired and Sasuke nodded, his breath hitching in another sob.

"That old bastard," she scoffed and then looked back at Sasuke.

"I'll have your brother visit you in the hospital, Sa-su-ke-kun," Sakura whispered. But when she raised her right hand, Sasuke grabbed her arm again.

"S…ry…" he sobbed.

And the voice trapped behind the wall wriggled free and seized control of her mouth.

"You were fucking ten," she quietly replied, echoing his words. There was no venom left. She had broken him, exactly what the sick, putrid anger raging inside of her had wanted. There was nothing left for her to say. But it didn't matter because Sasuke was in far too much pain to understand what was going on. Sakura tightened her hand into a fist, drew it back and smacked it straight into Sasuke's forehead. His eyes rolled back, mouth going slack. The shaking stopped and his sobbing abruptly cut off. Instead, his chest rose and fell in an even pattern, free of any conscious pain.

"You fought well," she told his unconscious form as she rose to her feet. She turned and Gaara stood, watching her, with Kankuro slung over his shoulder. He hovered a little bit away from her, as if he was _afraid_ of her. As she watched, Gaara eyed Sasuke's twisted leg. His thigh muscles had contracted around the severed bone, turning his leg upside down in the process. Gaara eyed his own leg and then looked back up at Sakura.

Good God. He **was** afraid.

Sakura rolled her eyes. She had made it clear that everything was over after the competition so there was no need to monitor his reactions anymore. Turning her back to him, she signaled for the referee to get off his damned platform to wrap things up. As if on cue, the previously quiet audience broke into an equal combination of applause and fearful whispering. Even the flowers that people traditionally threw at the winners were tossed carefully, as if Sakura were some bomb in danger of detonating. A man in a crisp suit and a million-dollar-smile walked on, carrying a giant check, addressed just to Kankuro and Gaara are she had requested.

"Congratulations, Team Suna. That was quite the performance. On behalf of the founders of AIMAT, I'd like to offer my sincere congratulations for your victory," he said as he pumped Gaara's free hand with gusto. Sakura's eyes drifted to the audience above and something golden caught her gaze. In the very front row of the VIP box, sat Deidara. A few rows up, she saw Kisame lounging across two chairs and Itachi sat beside him. Their eyes met and Itachi inclined his head and mimed clapping. Sakura jerked her head towards Deidara who immediately perked up.

'Did you bring him here?'

Deidara swiveled around to glower at Itachi but was ignored. Itachi shook his head. Sakura circled her pinky above her head once and then made a cutting motion across her throat.

'I'm cutting all ties here.'

Itachi half-smiled.

"Congratulations, Miss," the man with the check interrupted, holding his hand out. When Sakura finally paid attention, she realized that he had been addressing her. She ignored him as she gathered up the fragments of her sword and the sheath that had broken at some point during the match.

"Haruno, where are you going?" Gaara demanded, grabbing her wrist.

"Don't touch me so casually, Sabaku," she stated in such a flat tone that he immediately released her. As she spoke, Itachi and Kisame disappeared from the VIP box. Trying her best to show much she didn't care, she cruelly turned her back to the boy that had pretended to be her boyfriend for nearly nine months. Without any farewells, without any lingering looks, she held her head high and walked out of the arena. The paramedics in the waiting room sprang up as she approached but one look from her was enough to keep them away. She climbed up the deserted stairwell and travelled down the echoing hallways until she finally reached the lobby where some of the audience was beginning to gather. A few people glanced her way but let her pass without complaint. It was only when Sakura reached the parking lot outside that her peace was interrupted.

"Congratulations, Miss Black Widow!" some middle-aged woman blabbered, oblivious to the looks of horror others were giving her. But when she drew closer, a group of men in black suits appeared with their backs to her. They closed ranks, forming a tight circle around her. Directly in front of her was Itachi.

"I assume that you're done with all this child's play, Sakura," he quietly said, glancing back at her. His gaze lingered on her shoulder where dried blood was beginning to flake off. Sakura reached out, taking his bandaged hand, and channeled the rest of her chakra into him. When she finished, his fingers clung to hers for an extra second. But he released her and flexed his fingers, testing the newly healed skin. Sakura held out her hand and Sasori tossed her a brand new carton of Gaulouises. She ripped the cardboard open and stuck one in her mouth. As she flipped her lighter open, she spotted a familiar head above Kisame's shoulder to her right. She took a deep breath and exhaled a cloud of dark gray.

"Well… you're usually right, Nii-san," she responded as she lightly tapped Kisame's back. He shifted to the side, revealing Deidara standing, staring at her. The crowd that had gathered in the lobby kept a wide berth around them. Even if they didn't quite understand what was going on, it was easy to sense the tension in the air.

"Ah, Onii-chan, did you enjoy the match?" Sakura asked. Her mouth was smiling but her eyes were made of steel. As she took a step forward, Deidara almost took a step back, his right food sliding a little against the asphalt.

"Oh well lookey here! Girly-boy here is practically pissing himself in front of Hime. Some fucking brother you turned out to be, shit-head," Hidan snorted. Sakura didn't say anything. She would have chosen a less coarse wording, but that was essentially what she had wanted to say. At Hidan's taunt, Deidara's eyes narrowed. He boldly took three steps towards Sakura, as if to prove Hidan wrong. Sakura had to fight to suppress her laugh. How childish.

"Did your goons deliver my message, yeah?" Deidara asked, sending Akatsuki an extra venomous stare. Sakura arched an eyebrow.

"Yes. And I only have two problems with your glorious plan, Onii-chan," Sakura stated with a smile. The corner of her lip twitched with barely-concealed irritation. Deidara's face lit up.

"Oh sure. Whatever you want, Sakura-chan. Whatever makes you happy, yeah."

Sakura lifted one finger streaked with dried blood.

"One. You don't just abandon a six year-old girl and then reappear 12 years later to tell her what to do," Sakura said with an innocent expression. The contrast between her words and her tone seemed to throw Deidara off for a moment. But his eager expression slowly faded into one of confusion. Kisame chortled quietly in the background.

"Two. You're not my brother. My brother, the one I knew 12 years ago, no longer exists. You may look like him, but my brother would never demand that I abandon everything for one of his stupid whims. So take this," Sakura continued in her light tone. She paused to take the silver chain around her neck and pull hard, severing a couple links. With a sickeningly sweet smile, she threw the lighter at Deidara's feet.

"And go. I don't care what your goal in life is anymore. **I** will make my own world where I'll be happy," she said. Sakura thought for a moment and then added a quick bow, like they were businesspeople completing a transaction.

"It's been a pleasure seeing you, Deidara-dono. Perhaps we'll meet again to discuss business," Sakura said. As she turned, Itachi's hand found its way to her lower back, supporting her as she walked.

"You look tired," he quietly commented as Sasori flipped his cell phone open to call their drivers.

"HOLD ON, YEAH! WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?" Deidara exploded. Sakura sighed. She had been expecting the anger, although she secretly hoped that it would occur after she left the premises. She stopped, barely glancing at her enraged brother over her shoulder. Deidara stomped around the wall of bodyguards to face Sakura. Itachi made to move but Sakura touched his shoulder, shaking her head.

"Yes, Deidara-dono?" Sakura said in her perfectly distant tone.

"I…am your brother. We share blood. So why are you choosing that Uchiha prick over me! Sakura-chan, remember? You said that you wanted to be together forever, yeah. Look! I built up my own name from the ground here. I finally have enough power to protect you, to make you happy!" Deidara shouted, gesturing wildly. The tattoos of mouths on his hands leered menacingly at her.

The gentle side of her that had been locked away behind the wall nudged its way forward. She could feel her expression soften as she searched for the right words. For some reason, she could only remember cheesy sayings from greeting cards. She raised her eyes to her brother. He was a little older, a little taller and probably a little more muscular. But his eyes were so different that she didn't recognize him anymore. They were the hardened, thoughtless eyes of an adult. Maybe that was what she had loved about her brother. He had been in his late teens: old enough to make promises but young enough to believe them.

"Neither of us are the same people that had those dreams. We were children. Let it go," she quietly said. Her words pierced through his anger once he realized that he had no real right to be angry in the first place. Still, Deidara searched her eyes, like he might be able to change something. But Sakura knew that there was no changing her mind and he must have seen it too. With a long sigh, Deidara shoved his hands into his pocket and pulled out a white business card.

"In case…. In case you ever feel like….you know," he trailed off, lowering his gaze. Sakura hesitated for a moment. She could be utterly nasty, smack it out of his hand and sever all ties with him forever. But the kind part of her heart tugged at her again. And the few but fond memories of sitting in her brother's lap and just being completely happy clung to her. She couldn't find the cruelty to do such a thing. Instead, she accepted the card with two hands and nodded politely.

"Hime, the car," Sasori spoke up. Itachi lightly touched her shoulder, guiding her towards the waiting limo. Sakura gave her brother one last searching look before she turned her back on him too. Sasori opened the door and waited for her to climb in the back seat before he sat next to her and shut the door. Itachi looped around to sit on her other side. Hidan, Zetsu and Kakazu paused to quietly greet her before they went off to their separate car. In the darkness of the car, Sakura found Itachi's hand and squeezed his fingers. He responded by pulling her close, resting her head against his chest. Sasori removed his jacket and draped it across her shoulders. Kisame turned up the heater without being asked. For once, he didn't tease her about her "damn foreign cigs" for stinking up the car and she was grateful.

"Where to, Hime?" the driver, a nameless underling inquired, peering at her through the rearview mirror.

"Konoha," she ordered. After a moment, she lifted her head to look up at Itachi.

"My luggage?"

"Already taken care of, Hime. Kisame packed them in the trunk," Sasori replied. Sakura closed her eyes and laid her head against Itachi's chest again. She didn't resist when he pulled the cigarette out from between her lips. Cool air rushed into the car as Itachi lowered the window and tossed the still-smoking cigarette out. There was the mechanical whir as the window began to rise again but it suddenly stopped.

"Sakura," Itachi said.

Something in his tone made her open her eyes. Sakura just barely managed to catch a glimpse of Gaara's forlorn expression through the window before the car began cruising through the crowded parking lot. Their eyes met and for some reason, she suddenly felt her cheeks grow hot with shame.

And just like he had the day before, he slowly raised his hand and waved at her. She quickly buried her face in Itachi's chest, afraid of what she would do if she saw Gaara's face again. Someone like him with such a sharp tongue and nasty temper…making such a heartbroken expression… It didn't seem right.

"Are you sure…this is what you want? Will you be happy?" Itachi quietly asked as closed the window the rest of the way. Sakura's fingers tightened in the front of his shirt.

"Yes," she said without hesitation.

Everyone in the car was silent. Itachi's arms tightened around her, anticipating her tears. But she was done crying. Tears wouldn't change anything. Instead, she squeezed her eyes shut and tried to take a deep breath. Somehow, the smell of Itachi's aftershave, the comforting smell she had come to love, repulsed her. She wanted soap.

Sandalwood and soap and a sarcastic sense of humor.

* * *

As always, reviews are appreciated. I think with the reviewrs' help, Sakura has finally overcome her whiny bitch stage. I'm throwing confetti right now.


	15. Epilogue: Grey

Black Widow and the Sandman

Epilogue: Grey

"Little brother!"

Gaara heard the nagging voice at the edges of his mind. But he was floating in such a pleasant dream that he couldn't bring himself to care. There were arms wrapped around him, hands folded flat across his stomach, and a warm body was pressed against his back. Her soft sigh brushed against the back of his neck.

"Are you awake?" he heard himself ask. He was too afraid to open his eyes. For some reason, he knew that if he saw her, she would really disappear again. To his relief, her soft laugh, the rare one he had always loved to hear, filled his ears. The vibrations of her laughter thrummed pleasantly up and down his spine, making his toes tingle. She shifted her head and he felt her soft hair press against his shoulder blade.

"Hey, Haruno…" he quietly began.

"Hmm?" she hummed. She pressed her cool lips against his spine and Gaara squirmed a little. She laughed again, twisting her legs into the covers.

"You're not real… are you?" he forced himself to say. It wasn't really a question since he already knew the answer.

"Of course not," Sakura replied, still giggling. But her laughter faded into silence. Her arms tightened around him and Gaara felt her pressing her face between his shoulder blades. Her tears were hot against his bare skin.

"Do you love me, Haruno?"

"Of course. This is your dream, remember?" she retorted, her voice thick with tears. Even though she wasn't the person he wanted, just the thought that she might be upset made his stomach churn. Before he could stop himself, he grabbed her arm, pulling him on top of him so that she was straddling him. When his eyes finally opened, she was sitting, still crying. She lifted her hands to her face, trying to wipe the tears away. But they flowed over and a droplet landed on his cheek. Gaara pulled her hands towards him, lacing his fingers with hers. And Sakura, real or not, was looking at him.

"Tell her I love her," he whispered as he pulled her forward, pressing his lips against hers. She half-laughed, half-sobbed.

"I thought I told you, I'm not real," she replied, smiling through her tears. Gaara cupped her cheek in his hand and she put both her hands over his.

"Little brother!"

Gaara felt his heart sink into the pit of his stomach as his heavy eyelids slid open. He stared at the empty space in front of him. He could have sworn that just a second ago, Sakura had been there. But he knew that it had all just been in a dream and it just made the memory sting more. Ignoring Temari's persistent calls, he rolled onto his side and closed his eyes, trying to remember the feel of her lips against his.

* * *

"Sakura!"

She bolted upright when she felt a hand shaking her. Her hand reflexively lashed out. But when her tired eyes finally focused, Itachi was kneeling beside her bed with a strained smile on his face. He kept his right hand close to his chest as two of his fingers stuck out at odd angles.

"I'm sorry," she mumbled as she took his hand. He winced just a little as she set the fingers back into place and soothed them with chakra. But Itachi, who was usually fascinated by her healing, wasn't paying any attention to her hands. His dark eyes were fixated on her face. When she was done, Sakura looked up at him with a tentative smile, silently asking for forgiveness. He didn't notice. Sakura squeezed his newly-fixed hand.

"Nii-san?"

Itachi reached up and brushed his fingers against her cheek. He held out his free hand to her, revealing the moisture clinging to his skin. Belatedly, Sakura realized that she was sniffling. She put her palm against her chest and felt the little hitch in her breath each time she exhaled. When she tentatively touched her face, she felt the tears streaming from her eyes.

"Sakura, what happened?" Itachi softly inquired, looking up into her face. Sakura touched her lower lip as she remembered the phantom touch that had lingered there in her dream.

"I feel as if… somehow… I had a very… very… happy dream," she brokenly replied as a fresh sob travelled up her throat. Itachi got to his feet and tightly wrapped his arms around her. Sakura rested against his strong chest, wishing that the feelings squeezing her insides would disappear. She was suffocating on an emotion she was sure she had locked away. But that didn't make it hurt any less.

"Go back to sleep, Sakura. Sleep and have your happy dream again." Itachi's soothing words smoothed over the ache in her heart that had seemingly come from nowhere. Suddenly, she felt so unbearably tired and she found her eyes closing. The slow rhythm of Itachi's heart pulled her far away from the pain. She felt herself sinking back into the place that she almost remembered.

"Sakura."

This time, Sakura didn't open her eyes. She took a moment to just feel. She was laying in the softest bed, on smooth cotton sheets, the kind luxury hotels used. A fan hummed above them as the blades beat the air. A mosquito buzzed faintly in the background. As she lay, listening, the soft roar of the ocean reached her ears. She took a deep breath through her nose, taking in the briny smell of the sea mixed with tropical flowers and a deeper, musky scent that, for some reason, made her hear skip a beat. She recognized it all immediately. This was her favorite bungalow located on one of the Harunos' privately-owned islands in the Pacific. Sunlight filtered in through the slotted wooden panels that made up the ceiling. The warmth spread through her limbs and-

That scent.

…was that… sandalwood?

She turned her head and barely cracked an eye open. There was dark red splayed across the white sheets. For a moment, she stared at the pale back in front of her. With a sigh, he rolled over, making his muscles ripple with every movement. His sleepy smile stretched across his face as he took her in.

"You're back," he simply said, his deep voice still rough with sleep. Sakura stared at him as he stretched easily in the bed and then, without warning, grabbed her arm. He was so relaxed, as if this was exactly where he belonged. Before she could protest, he yanked her over and pulled her on top of him, forcing her to straddle him. Gaara's lazy smile was the same as she remembered, his thick eyebrows slanting over his glittering eyes. He was so full of that arrogance that she had grown to love and hate at the same time.

"What do you mean? I've never brought you here before," she replied, unable to tear her gaze from him. He was wearing the same dark sweatpants he wore around the dojo. The dark burgundy tattoo above his right eye peeked through his bangs.

"You were dreaming about this place… about me… Don't you remember? Right before you woke up?" Gaara replied. He seemed to deliberate for a moment and then, grabbing both her wrists, yanked her forward and captured her lips. It wasn't anything like their last kisses, or any of their kisses for that matter. He was sweet, gentle and unhurried. It felt so natural, like they had been doing this for forever. They way his lips molded around hers, like caresses, made her chest begin to ache again. When he finally pulled away, his infuriating grin was back on his face.

"He says that he still loves you, you know," he suddenly informed her. Sakura shook herself from her momentary surprise. Ignoring the pleasant tingle in her lips, she forced herself to focus.

"**He**? You mean… the _you_ outside my dream?" Sakura asked. Gaara nodded. His hands relaxed their grip as he began stroking her arms with his thumbs. The warmth felt so real. Every little touch was so perfect that she didn't even try to resist. His hands slid to her waist. He pressed against the small of her back, coaxing her to lie down on his chest.

"How do you know that? You're not even real," she sighed as she rested her cheek against his bare skin. Gaara's low laugh rumbled through him.

"That doesn't mean it's not true, Haruno," he replied. His fingers began slowly stroking through her hair. Sakura exhaled heavily, closing her eyes again. She was so perfectly comfortable there. His fingers lingered on the charred tips of her hair from her fight with Sasuke. After a length, Gaara spoke again. But he hesitated, as if he was trying to figure out how to word his thoughts properly.

"Isn't it about time…that you started living for yourself, Sakura?"

Sakura smiled. She raised herself on her elbows to get one last glimpse of his happy face, to erase that last hopeless glimpse she had gotten from him at the end of the competition. But the warmth suddenly drained from her body. And she knew before she opened her eyes, that he would already be gone. Of course. She was lying on her stomach and the hand stroking her head wasn't his. She was very still for a while. Itachi obviously knew that she was awake, but didn't say anything as he continued to brush his fingers through her hair. Finally, Sakura lifted her head and looked over at Itachi.

"I need a haircut."

* * *

It took Gaara nearly a week to finally emerge from his room. There was a faint layer of stubble on his chin. His hair was a tangled nest of stubborn snarls. His clothes, at least, were passably clean. As he stumbled to the bathroom, he passed Temari hobbling through the house on her crutches. With the prize money from the tournament, they had found her a good physical therapist and paid off all their hospital bills. After setting up Kankuro for the rest of medical school, there had been enough money left over to spruce up the dojo and hire two employees to pick up Temari's slack. Temari, who had been digging through the refrigerator, froze. She straightened, a carton of eggs held in her hand.

"Oh… Gaara…. You're alive…" she said. Gaara half-nodded and shuffled the rest of the way to the bathroom. After a hot shower and a shave, he emerged feeling slightly more human. He sat at the kitchen table, not really paying attention as Temari set a plate stacked with pancakes and bacon in front of him. He ate, not tasting and drank two cups of coffee with generous spoonfuls of sugar. Kankuro, sitting across from him, stared at the spectacle. The puppeteer cleared his throat and Gaara, his mouth stuffed with food, finally noticed his older brother.

"Say… Gaara… I ordered some new training equipment for the dojo. Do you mind going out to pick it up?" Kankuro asked. Gaara gulped some more breakfast down as he finally began to realize just how hungry he was. He took a moment to nod at his brother and finished another plate of food before he was satisfied. After a mumbled 'thanks' to Temari, Gaara retreated to his room to change into a fresh t-shirt and sweatpants. He crammed his feet into sneakers and climbed down the stairs and out the dojo's doors to the street outside. The sun was so blindingly bright that he had to close his eyes for a minute. He dug in his pocket before he found a cigarette hiding at the very bottom. Gaara stuck it in his mouth and lit it before tossing the cheap lighter back in his pocket. When he took a breath, a strong, fragrant scent filled his mouth and nostrils.

It was one of Sakura's cigarettes.

It tasted disgusting and he wanted to spit it out. But for a moment, he remembered the way her soft lips would pucker as she exhaled. Late at night, after a long spar, they would lie together on the floor of the dojo. And if she had had a particularly rough day, she would roll over and kiss him, still tasting of those foul cigarettes. The taste was burned into his mouth, his memory. So, he settled for shoving his hands into his pockets and slowly walking down the street, puffing away on the cigarette. The weapons supplier was only a few blocks away and he made it there in less than ten minutes. He pulled the glass door open, listening to the bell ring merrily at his entrance. As he paused to grind the cigarette out under his foot, a familiar voice greeted him.

"Ah! Good timing, Sabaku! I got your shipment just this morning," the old shopkeeper greeted him with a smile. But Gaara's attention wasn't fixed on him. There was a girl- no, a woman, with her hand frozen in the air, as if she had just been reaching for the doorknob. A katana encased in a black and gold sheath was clenched tightly in her hand. Sunlight streamed in through the shop windows, glinting menacingly off the painted wood. Her pink hair was cut in a shaggy bob that barely reached her chin. The biting emerald of her eyes pierced through his chest.

"It was nice doing business with you, Tazuna-san. Take care," she said, not looking away from him. Gaara felt his chest clench tight, like he was drowning. The glorious stench of her imported cigarettes fanned off of her like cheap perfume. Even the way the corners of her mouth twitched down made his stomach roll. Her lips were painted bright red. A clown's mouth.

"It was an honor, Hime," the shopkeeper called after her. Her arm brushed against his as she walked out of the shop. The tips of her hair barely grazed his cheek and it suddenly felt like the skin there was on fire. Gaara listened to her easy steps against the sidewalk. He told himself to wait, told himself to retain some dignity. But the sounds of her footfalls were growing faint and that seized him with such crippling fear that his voice escaped his mouth.

"HARUNO!" he blurted out.

Her footsteps stopped very slowly, as if she had been waiting for him to speak.

"Is that it? Are you running away again?" he demanded. He knew he was shouting. And he was angry, angry at her for disappearing and angry at himself for being deceived. But he wasn't shouting because of that. He needed to reach her. And somehow, it felt like if he spoke normally, she would never hear him.

"I'm not going to beg you for anything, Haruno. I'm in love with you and you know it. What are you going to do?" he spat. His heart nearly stopped when he heard her take a few steps in his direction. Her cool fingers were on his shoulder, sliding up his throat. She grabbed his chin and jerked his face towards hers. To his surprise, her eyes were wide, like she was trying to hold back tears. Her mouth was set in a firm line, but those eyes gave away everything.

She took a deep breath and for a moment, he had one faint glimmer of hope that she would finally say what she really felt. But he could see that wall go down in her eyes. She was lying to herself again. Locking away herself for the prosperity of her damned clan. Her lips moved as she tried to form words. Her fingers loosened, gently stroking his cheek as they fall back to her side.

"If…if you really are in love with me…. If you really feel stupid enough to keep chasing me…. Come and find me," she finally said. She reached into her pocket and held out a wrinkled sheet of paper her cupped palm. Her fingers trembled as she forced the object into his hand and closed his fingers around it.

"Can I kiss you one last time?" Gaara suddenly whispered. There was a certain finality to her words, as if she were on her deathbed. Sakura gave him the most pained smile as she thought it over.

"Goodbye, Gaara," she simply said, shaking her head. But Gaara ignored her as he took her hand, lifted it up between them and pressed a soft kiss against her knuckles. His eyes locked on hers and for a moment, he was sure that a single tear was glittering on her cheek. But he blinked, she pulled out his grasp and the tear was gone. She took one step back. Her footstep seemed to echo a million times.

"Goodbye," she said one last time, her voice much softer. With a gentle tug, she pulled free from his grasp. And then, she turned, carrying her new katana proudly over her shoulder, and walked in the opposite direction. And Gaara stood, his chest oddly numb and throbbing all at once, listening to her nimble footsteps fade into the morning air. Gaara brought his hand to his face and inhaled deeply. The scent of her stupid cigarettes clung faintly to his skin.

He closed his eyes and kissed his fingers, trying to remember her smile. When her silhouette had become a faint speck in the distance, Gaara looked down at the square of folded paper in his hand. It was crumpled up, as if it had been opened and re-folded a million times. When he carefully opened it, a shiny silver disk sat in the middle of the note.

_If you find me, I'll listen to everything you have to say and I'll tell you everything you need to hear. I'm not giving you any clues and I'm not sending anyone to help you. _

_Tag, you're it, Sandman. _

Gaara pinched the disk between his thumb and forefinger, bringing it to eye-level. The front was black with a silver spider embossed in the center. When he turned it around, he recognized it as an earring. The spider was identical to the ink engraved into her chest. And for some odd reason, as he stared at the arachnid, a laugh ripped from his chest.

He was tagged.

* * *

Thanks to all my readers for sticking with me during this story. I know there are definitely some people plotting to kill me because of the ending. But never fear. A sequel is definitely on the way!

I want to extend special thanks to my reviewers who were always there to point out mistakes and offer their thoughts. You guys are amazing!

Special thanks to a certain someone who nagged me to death so that I could finish up this last chapter.


End file.
